It's Complicated

Chapter 5: Confronting

Hanish was burning with jealousy. I could feel the heat coming from him even though he was riding fast on the chilled highway, zooming through the drizzles and dodging the cars around. It was scary, yet fun. For a second it affected me as I looked at him, his furrowed brows and his silence. The words piled up in my throat and my grip on his shoulders tightened.

As my tongue moved inside to speak, I sighed. Nothing came out of my mouth and I left his shoulders. I was tired of being concerned for him and letting it affect my mood. So, I paid attention to the moment.

The Mumbai lights shone brightly at 11 am as we drove under the clouded sky, huge streetlights whooshing past us and tiny raindrops kissing my face.

Am I using him?

Maybe I am.

Is that wrong?

Maybe it is.

As my brows narrowed deeper, my heart felt light. There was no guilt in it. Though I felt bad for Hanish in the corner of my heart, I did not regret my decision to meet someone through him without expressing my intentions.

What have I come to? I wasn't somebody who could use someone. Or was I?

Even though I was glad about my risk-taking today, some parts of me did not allow me to remain so. I sunk inside my gut as we reached the station, my shoulders drooped as I stood up. As we started walking, he started checking the indicator for the next train, "Platform number 3," he said. I followed him like a puppy, held him by his arm, and slowly looked at his face.

Stoic. One step at a time, slowly we the bridge, but his eyes remained silent. His lips neither curved upwards nor downwards. He looked at me staring at him and bobbed his head asking, 'What?'

I looked straight ahead walking over the bridge, I saw his cheeks had no shine but his brows were just slightly wrinkled.

Got it! He seems upset!

I told myself.

Of course, he will be, Anika!

I rolled my eyes at myself.

Taking a deep breath, I held his t-shirt while climbing down the bridge. My chest felt heavy and confused and my thoughts exhausted me. As we stood on the platform, awaiting the train, I tried to start a conversation, "Tina didn't come?"

He shrugged, "Must be busy."

"But I came after office hours..."

"I don't know..."

"Didn't you ask her?"

He did not reply.

I kept looking at him and he said, "Good that she didn't come, I couldn't have been able to bear her to be the witness to my humiliation."

I knew this was about to come. I was waiting for it. "What humiliation?" I asked with raised brows and a smirk.

"You flirting with my best friend."

I rolled my eyes, "We have had this conversation once. Why are you repeating it?" my gut was starting to boil, "And don't you remember? You have taught me as a boyfriend that I should never keep on going on and on on the same topic," I glared at him, "Then why are you doing the same now?"

He went silent when I showed him his mistake. He kept looking in the other direction, feigning busyness in his phone, and did not want to acknowledge his blunders. This had become my trigger point now. In fact, not just for him, but he had molded me in such a way that anyone denying their mistakes rang a rage in my head and I would shout, "What happened now? Why are you silent? Say something?" I smirked at him with wide eyes, demanding answers, "Why are you starting with the same topic that we have already discussed once?"