In the Shadow of Regret (Sebastian Sallow Story)

Twenty-Three | Only Behind Closed Doors

"May I ask you something?" I hesitantly ask.

Sebastian nods as he opens another door and waits for me walk through.

"Why do you continuously make things difficult between us? First you insist on keeping me away, only to later pursue me. I guess what I am trying to understand is...what do you honestly feel for me?"

"I don't know," he responds in a low voice. I attempt to read his facial expressions, but to no avail.

I stay quiet, unsatisfied with his answer. Sebastian has consistently denied having any feelings for me, and yet the mere mention of a potential relationship Marvolo is enough to provoke a significant reaction out of him.

"But what I do know is that I still harbor strong feelings for you. Both positive and negative," he answers honestly.

"Okay... then be honest. Tell me how you really feel," I insist as he looks over to me. "You said you wanted to talk. To make amends.. this is your chance to do so."

"Not like this... not tonight."

"Stop being a fucking coward and just be honest...how do you really fe-"

Before I am able to react, he grabs ahold of me and apparates us into the undercroft.

Once we are alone, he lets go and paces back and forth before finally turning to me.

"You want the truth? Well, here it is... I hate you." He admits, "I hate you for being so dishonest with me about your past. For manipulating me into helping you find the repositories for your father! Who was working with Ranrok, the goblin who I believed at the time, was responsible for my sister's curse.... I believed you when you said you didn't know that it was your father's doing, but you were fully aware that Ranrok did. And yet you kept that bit of information from me... I hate you for being the daughter of Victor Rookwood... and then continuing to leave me in the dark after the fact!"

"You aren't innocent either!" I argue, "you have hurt me in the past too!"

Without hesitation he walks over to me and leans in. His face is only inches away from mine, and despite our significant height difference, I stand my ground. "Well, this is YOUR chance to be honest with me. You have my undivided attention."

"I hate you for being so goddamn stubborn! for constantly throwing my mistakes in my face as if you had never made any yourself! For not being able to put your ego aside long enough for us to sort things out! For not being empathetic enough to understand I had my reasons for lying! and most importantly, for being so damn difficult that you consistently push me away rather than to admit you still have feelings for me!"

His gaze remains on me, but despite everything I have just said he does not stand down. He has been asking for honesty and I am more than happy to oblige to his request. However, I am the first to break our eye contact in an attempt to deescalate the situation. I wouldn't want Ominis to find his undercroft completely destroyed. I increase the distance between us, when I suddenly feel a hand grab ahold of my wrist. Pulling me back to him.

"And I hate you for all the pain and uncertainty your betrayal has caused me..." I attempt to pull away but his hold tightens, " but despite your flaws...I still care for you. I admire  how selfless, patient, and kind you are. Especially to those who are undeserving of it. I admire how fearless and unapologetically stubborn you are... never once backing down from a fight. But most of all I admire how fiercely loyal you are. Weasley couldn't have said it better himself when he expressed that anyone in your mere presence should consider themselves lucky...Because meeting you, is to love you."