do you hear it

chapter 4 comfort

" Lewis if we want to see Evin for a good amount of time we have to go."

" I know love I'm coming."

We head out the door and walk for a bit until we got to a spot, we could catch a cab we get in and head off to see Evin. All I can think about how he will react to us being in his life will he be mad at us can you really blame him. How could he forgive me I know how bad it hurts to not have parents or someone to lean on. It's so hard not to blame myself for what happened even if everybody tells me it was not my fault.

" Hey buddy."

" Mom dad!"

We sat on his bed with him he took moment to look at us almost like he was making sure we were real. His eyes a deep bule just like his dad Lewis thinks he looks like me, but I look at him and Lewis is all I see. Then he rapped us in a hug Lewis, and I looked at ech other in shock then smile.  

" I knew you would come back for me."

Lewis looks at his son " of course we would."

A little later we had to go home we say goodbye to Evin and head off I hope everything goes well and we can take him home soon. I still think about him coming home it's like it hurts more every time we say goodbye to him. But he wasn't mad at us all how could he not be we got home and Lewis noticed I was off. I was sitting on the windowsill with my knees to my chest watching the cars pass by he came to sit with me. I didn't even look at him or show that I knew he was there just kept watching the car lost in my own world.

" Hey, you ok" he asked with a concerned look.   

  " Fine."

" Lyla... you're not fine I can see it."

" I said I'm fine!"

" My love you're pushing me away."

I stood up and stormed off to the bedroom Lewis followed me in I was still not saying a word I just pasted over and over in the room. he saw I was breathing heavy my hands shaking biting my nails and he knew was a panic attack. He took action sitting me on the bed and him sitting trying to look for how to help me.

" Hey look me you're ok I'm right here."  

" L... Lewis I can't."

" I know focus on me."

I started to hold onto him trying to focus on my breathing feeling his warmth helped me know I was safe. His hands on my knees my arms around his waist my face in his chest his chin on top of my head.

" That's it loves just breathe."

" h... how did you know

" I saw you picking at your skin in the cab, and I knew something was wrong."

" You know about that?"

" Yes... you really should stop that it's not good for you."

" I'm sorry I know it's bad." 

He kissed my forehead his thumbs rubbing my temples, and I relax into his touch I was able to stop shaking he looked me I smirked back.

" Love, you said you would talk to me if something was wrong..."

" Lewis... I don't want to talk about this."   

" Why you act fine and your close to me one minute then you get mad and shut me out the next." 

" I told you I don't trust people..."

" You can trust me."

I know he cares but I thought my mom did and she left me what will stop him from doing the same?

" I know I'm annoying."

suddenly there was a knock on the door I leave Lewis in the room to answer it and it was my best friend Lizzy.

" Lyla why didn't you call me!"

Love... who is that."

" Love? Lyla who is he and why is he calling you love."  

" He is the man I met on the rooftop I told you about, my boyfriend and Evin's father Lewis this is Lizzy my best friend.

" You found him?" Lizzy asked with a shocked look on her face. 

I nod and Lewis and Lizzy shake hands they seem to be getting alone well for the most part even if they are confused. I get a feeling they will be ok with ech other for now at lest' I get a call from Mr. Jeffres. I leave the room to go answer it while Lewis and Lizzy sit down in the living room and talk.  

" So how long have you known Lyla?'

" Oh, since childhood we were in preschool together and best friends ever since."

" Thats a long time."

" Yeah, so how you and her been getting along?"

" Its... ok she acts fine one minute the pushes me away the next."

" Hey, don't take it personal she doses that with everyone since her mom left but she dose that with people she loves the most."

" The people she loves the most?" 

" If she cares she will do that because she doesn't want to lose you and if you do it won't hurt as bad."

" So, what do I do to show her that I won't leave her?"

" Stay with her wait for her to open up she will it just takes time."

" I just wish I could show her I love her."

" I can tell you one thing she really dose love you when you were apart she would not stop looking for you."

" She looked for me?"

" Oh, hell yeah every day she was at that arch 10 o'clock waiting."