The Blast

I know y'all missed me

A week went by, seven days of the two hedgehogs choking down mobian flesh in the public eye while also secretly sustaining themselves with the rations shadow had brought with him. Each meal would consist of the two sneaking off into shadows room to share a can of cut up mangos or peaches. Tonight they were having pears, their backs against the wall sitting on shadows bed as they ate in silence, both lost in thought. The azure sighed a bit, staring out the window. Shadow wasn't eating much. He had seen sonic throwing up after lunch and figured the azure needed the food more than him.
"Do you ever miss your life before all this?" Sonic suddenly spoke up, breaking the silence between them. He seemed really desperate to ask for some reason, as if he was searching for a kind of reassurance.
Shadow didn't remember much of his life before the blast, but he lied anyways to ease the azures concerns.
"Yes, of course." He replied. Sonic turned to face the ebony when he suddenly realizes he ate the whole can of pear slices. He looks guilty.
"Were you not hungry?" He asks.
"I'll be fine." Shadow replied. "Not much of an appetite tonight."
Sonic seemed to hesitate to accept that explanation, but tossed the empty can aside regardless. He has his hands clasped together in silence, sitting on the bed and twiddling his thumbs.
Shadow can't help but feel that the silence is suddenly awkward for some reason, and he clears his throat. "Well then." He stands up and stretches. "You outa get back to your room now, huh?"
Sonics eyes get a little wider and he quickly jerks his head to look up at shadow. "no, please-" he says, catching shadow off guard. "....I don't want to be alone tonight.. can I.. stay here?" He seems embarrassed, and shadow does too.
Regardless, the ebony man's up, straightening his posture and nodding gently in response before sitting back down. He figures this means that sonic will be sleeping in the same bed as him... Unless he'd prefer the floor, which is doubtful.
The thought embarrasses shadow further, but also creates this strange and warm feeling inside him.
They've slept next to each other before... Why should this be any different?
The ebony stops overthinking, shaking his thoughts out and sighing softly.
"Thank you." Sonic says, staring at the door to shadows room.
The ebony hadn't considered that maybe sonic just didn't want knuckles disturbing him tonight, as their activities seem to be a bit off and on lately. He didn't want to think about that, or specifically them, together.. touching each other. Just the thought of it makes his blood boil a bit. He doesn't know why it makes him so angry, just seeing them together. He never thought he was capable of feeling such trivial emotions like jealousy or envy.
Sonic yawned, bringing shadow back to reality. He figured the azure was tired, and decided to make a sacrifice and also maybe test the waters a bit. He stood up, grabbing one of the pillows and his sleeping bag. Sonic watched as he prepared for bed. "what are you doing?" He asked.
Shadow unrolled his sleeping bag. "You can have the bed." He said as he positioned his pillow. "I'll be fine down here."
It seemed like sonic was hesitating to say something he clearly really wanted to say. Eventually he pipes up, giving shadow the type of response he was subconsciously looking for.
"I-I mean... I don't mind sharing the bed... If you don't, obviously..." He's avoiding eye contact, but he seems really sincere.
The ebony doesn't want to seem eager, and he really isn't, but he wouldn't mind. He hesitated to answer on purpose, to seem more reluctant.
"I don't mind..." He stands back up, sitting on the left side of the bed, then lying down on his back, hands crossed over his stomach. Sonic lied down next to him on his right side, facing the ebony with his hands under his cheek comfortably against the pillow. He let out a comfortable sigh, closing his eyes.
Shadow glanced at him, then reached down to the single candle on the floor next to the bed, using his fingers to snuff out the flame. Now that the room was dark he sat in silence, staring up at the ceiling. On one hand he was prepared for yet another sleepless night, or at least a restless one, and on the other hand the sound of sonics gentle breathing beside him is almost.. comforting in a way...
"I don't mean to make you uncomfortable..." Shadow was surprised by sonics sudden statement. He thought the azure had fallen asleep already. He turned to look at sonic. It wasn't much darker than it had already been with the candle, so he could catch the azures gaze.
"I'm not uncomfortable, honest." The ebony spoke reassuringly.
"...you seem kinda tense." Sonic replied.
Shadow slightly evaluated his body language, clearing his throat a little.
"I'm not..." He replied. "I've just never really... Well..." Sonic gave him a weird look at this, which shadow took note of.
"I mean.. what are we?"
Sonics face instantly grew red at the question, mouth suddenly getting dry and hands getting clammy. "Wha- what do you mean? 'what are we?'" he chuckled the last part nervously as if shadow was asking a silly question.
"I just mean... I don't know, it feels like there's something between us sometimes..." The ebony was slightly frantic giving sonics tone, feeling as if he had said something wrong. In reality sonic just had no desire to label their relationship yet. "I think what I really want is just.. some kind of confirmation from you, like some kind of communication..."
Sonic paused, his expression softening slightly. He seemed to realize he's probably been confusing shadow almost this whole time, weather it's by neglecting to share information about their current situation or just leaving it up to the ebony to decide what he wants from him. "...do you just want me to say that I might want to be more than friends?" He mumbled a bit, staring down at his hands.
"I want you to tell me what you want."
The room is filled with silence again. Sonic takes this bold statement the wrong way, of no fault of the ebony, a small tingle running up his thighs. He shakes it off, pulling his head out of the gutters and trying to think of a legitimate response. He knows what he wants, but he's too afraid of rejection to ever admit it, however it seems as if shadow is kind of forcing his hand.
"I... Want..." His tongue seems to be glued to the roof of his mouth. "...I'm sorry, I'm not good with my words.."
Shadow sighed softly in response, staring up at the ceiling. The azure felt shadow had a right to know about his feelings towards him, but he had no way to verbally express them. His finger tapped against the bed, probably the only notable sound in the room, before he sat up slowly, staring down at the ebony for a second. He tried not to hesitate out of fear of it being awkward, leaning in a bit. He felt shadow flinch slightly beneath him, but he didn't say anything or try to stop him. The azure gently closed the gap between their lips, keeping things soft and sweet, a nice change of pace for their current situation.
Shadows eyes were shut a bit tight, only because he was tense. He was unfamiliar with affection and things of the like, having never kissed a person before in his life. A significant portion of the memories he does have from his previous life were spent alone in various spaces. He had grown rather comfortable being alone after the blast as well.
When sonic pulled away the two of them shared a soft gaze in the dark. Sonic was admiring shadows eyes, having never been so close to them before now and shadow was focused on the feeling lingering on his lips.
"I think all I want is... I don't know... You make things a little more bearable, comfortable... I want things to be simple again..." The azure spoke. Shadow blinked, snapping out of his own thoughts. He nodded in response. "I think mostly I just don't want to be alone anymore... If I do have to be alone I'd at least want to be alone with you."
Shadow thought about this as sonic lost himself in his own thoughts. He had a great deal of sympathy for the azure, even if he had never really craved another presence before. He sat up a bit, just enough to place a pleasant peck on sonics lips. He had the desire to reassure the azure, make him feel safer, but he also kinda wanted another kiss, which he'd never admit out loud. Sonic smiled, a soft breath leaving his nose.
The ebony felt kinda mushy, unaware he was capable of making another person feel less alone or more comfortable just by being around. He was filled with a sort of pride, next to an overwhelming Desire to protect and keep the azure. "I'll try not to make things complicated then I suppose." Shadow spoke, lying back down. He clasped his hands again. "I just... I've never really done something like this."
Sonic tilted his head a little. "Never done what?" He asked curiously.
Shadow is a little embarrassed. "Like, a relationship or kissing... Stuff like that, you know? I'm kind of used to just being alone." 
Sonic blinked, his face slightly red. He's surprised on the inside. From his perspective shadow is a rather attractive mobian male, above average at least, so it was hard to believe that he was going about life with no one being romantically or sexually interested in him.
"Really?" The azure asks. "So you've never... Um.."
Shadow seems confused. "Never what?"
Sonic gulped nervously, his face kinda red. "You've never had sex with anyone?"
The ebony paused, then shrugged, shaking his head. "Never really saw a reason to honestly..." He replied. "...I-Is that bad?"
Sonic stifled a chuckle then shook his head softly. Shadows question was almost innocent in a way.
"It's not bad but..." The azure decided to take an opportunity to test the waters a little bit, His hand subtly trailing over shadows chest. "It's.. unhealthy to keep all that... Knotted up... Dissatisfied..." He says, adjusting his tone in a more promiscuous way as he gently walked his fingers up shadows chest.
Shadow trembled a bit, pushing sonics hand away and chuckling nervously.
"Ahem... I'm aware..." He says, his face red and warm now. "I get what you're implying but.. I don't think I'm ready for all that yet..."
Sonic is surprised by shadows boldness, but he accepts that a boundary has been set. He keeps his hands to himself, nodding humbly. "That's fine." He's almost impressed that he took the rejection so well.
"Plus I don't think here would be a good place to do that anyways. Everyone would be able to hear you." Shadow felt he needed to add that in.
Sonics eyes snapped open, realizing what shadow was implying by this. He was embarrassed, but mostly disgusted. The idea that shadow could hear him having sex with knuckles in the room across felt icky. He had no romantic or sexual desires towards knuckles anymore, not after seeing the horrific things he's done. He doesn't believe knuckles was a bad person at heart, he just hates what the circumstances around them have done to him. He doesn't have the heart to break things off with him... But he's also terrified of what knuckles might do to him if he does.
The thought almost paralyzes him, but he shakes it off, gazing at the ebony next to him, depending on him for a kind of comfort. He noticed shadow staring at the ceiling. He seems to do that a lot. He wondered what the ebony was thinking about, distracting him from his more unpleasant predictions. He inched closer to shadow -which wasn't hard given all they had to work with was one twin sized mattress- hesitantly wrapping his arm around his chest and pulling him a little closer.
Shadow froze for a second before the azure could feel his body relax beneath him. The ebony brought his arm up, giving sonic the opportunity to snuggle up against him completely. The azure sighed softly, a comfortable smile on his face as he rested his head on shadows chest, holding him closely and smelling his fur. The natural musk of a mobian man is so sweet and intoxicating. He could hear shadows rapid heartbeat and feel it against his face. It was a beat he could easily fall asleep to.
The ebony wrapped his arm around to the azures back, letting out a soft sound. He had never cuddled with someone but he always imagined it to be pleasant. And it was, honestly. Before it seemed like he'd never fall asleep, but now he can barely keep his eyes open. The gentle and musical sound of sonics breathing was almost mesmerizing. He always took note of how much sonic seemed to crave attention and affection, but he never really took a moment to ask himself if he needed those things too. Now it's pretty clear to him that he probably did.
It's always nice to end the night knowing something new about yourself.

(Ik it's been a while and I know this is short but please enjoy this fluff piece. I just love them so much and I've run out of ideas for the story so idk what else to dooooo 😭😭)