The Faire of Slébhte

Chapter One

    I had lost my desire for life before, not a normal thing for me, but I had reached my darkest point. Life was shit and the alcohol burned sweet. That was my eighteenth birthday motto.

      "Hey! Who has my makeup pallet?" My sister shouted from her bedroom, which wasn't needed considering me and my youngest sister were in the bathroom, and they shared a very thin wall.

         "It's in here, where else." I cracked my usual sarcastic smile, well curated to be my best façade.

           "Thanks smartass." She snaps but she grins, it was around five in the afternoon and we had just got off the bus at four, since then we'd been prepping for tonight.

         "Party at the Block!" My sister Brenhinol had seen a post through a a friend of a friend on her phone and being as I was going through a shitty ass period convinced me to leave my books of distant lands for a night and live a little.

       Like I didn't shave most my head and dyed it cherry red already.

        "Hey, they texted and said they'll be here in about thirty." We both nod and I head to dress.

        Wasn't much in the sense of fashion within my closet, more like a mixture of Adam Sandler meets book worm.

         I grabbed a tank top and my camo pants, securing them with a leather belt.

       Unlike my two younger sisters this was a new adventure for me, one I was prepared for in many ways; one being holding three knives on me in different places.

         "What?" I look at my sister Seren, she shakes her head.

          "Nothing. You about ready?" I nod sliding combat boots on and smoothing what was left of my hair into a small man bun. The sides all around my ears and neck bare and freshly shaved.

        I slide in a pair of screw earrings and one more knife into my bra. Iron blade, my treasure.

       Brenhinolyells about ten minutes later from outside and I see our friends car pull in, the dogs barking like mad.

        "She's here! Let's go!" I sling a satchel over my shoulder, inside is my shot glass with iron sprinkled in the glass, my ID, phone, cords, and a change of clothes for tomorrow.

           I head outside and jump in the front seat, as I reach for her vape with a mischievous smile.

          "Got anything to pre party with?" I joke and she grins back, pulling out a blue raspberry bootlegger and handing it to me.
  
            "Got you three the small and me the big one." I nod and slide it under my leg as I watch my mom walk up to her open window.

           "Please be careful tonight, watch out for your sisters, watch her." She gives my friend a pointed look and we laugh.

        "We're going to her apartment mom. Nothing more." My mom frowns and a voice nags me at the small fib, the knife at my chest itching a bit.

         "You heard me." I nod soberly, showing her I understood both the literal and underlying message.

         I was raised with my reality of the world shattered young, constantly sickly growing up, and because my mom believed I would be the criminal justice child allowed me many hours of shows related to.

        Needless to say my trust in men was never much to begin with and Prince Charming wasn't as charming to me as most girls my age thought he was.

         My sisters pile into the back, giggling as we head out, blasting music and drinking.

         I hid my sour face at the first sip, by the third it tasted like berries and wasn't so bad.

         "The boys are going to meet us at my apartment then we'll all pack into James truck and head there." Our friend Vivian tells us and we all nod as we turn into the parking lot of her place.

         "Now, no one get too stupid tonight, I am so not okay with being a babysitter." I should've remembered those words better.

         "We're Frances's alcohol is in our bloodline at this point." We all laugh but I know most of my jokes hold a darker truth, my knack for being comedic relief fell into dark humor, witty remarks, and barbed sarcastic comebacks when necessary.

We pull into her apartment parking lot and park, grabbing our bags from the back and heading up to her door. My grin widen when I spotted the flower herbal smoker and poofed to the porch with it, sparking it up while the rest chattered and finished getting ready.

As I let the smoke out I stared out over the balcony, studying the rolling hills mindlessly.

I let out a breath feeling the amour loosen around me slightly as I spiraled into my thoughts.

"Just keep an eye on your sisters, only reason you're really hear is to play bodyguard if needed." I think to myself, running my fingertips lightly over my clothed thigh, the handle of a folded knife slightly sticking out.

"Be honest, you sometimes wish something would happen, you want to know what it feels like to stab another human, self defense is the easiest way to do it without looking crazy." I jerk my head slightly to snap myself out of my thinking, knowing that path hovers simply to go darker.

I hated the damn voices, they were my own but not.

Voices I talked with, and they replied back, no not literally, didn't inherit the schitzo gene.

Its like if you internally ask yourself if you want the vanilla or chocolate ice cream, you debate with yourself.

I do that, but deeper.

Rather than constantly viewing things I experience or think with a first person view I sometimes mentally take a step back and think about it as a third person perspective, debate with myself in a new set of views.

....Yeah I know, but I was taught Therapy isn't real nor was mental health issues so, in my mind, I'm as normal as someone else is odd to me and vice versa.

I hated that one specifically though, picture having a voice that somehow someway always catastrophizes things, or thinks the worst things sometimes.

It'd be different if I acted on them, then I'd hold a level of concern.

"Hey did you hear me?" Viv asks and I nod, focusing back in and sterling myself for the night.

Yeah, I'm a kid becoming an adult, not super scary right?

Oh boy you'd be wrong.

Everything was changing and shifting like sand under my feet, nothing was solid anymore and friends became ghosts of the past.

Welcome to adulthood.

It wasn't all bad I think to myself as I laugh with my sisters.

Yeah life sucked and this moment wouldn't last, but it was one that held close, because hell it was rare we three got along, but when we did, I felt like I could conquer the world with ease having them by my side.

And when we fought...I hated it, we fought over stupid things but I always craved being that awesome older sister they looked up to and would burn the world down to protect them, because I really would.

Watching them grow up was amazing but watching them get hurt when I could've stopped it...that will forever be a dark spot in my memory.

I loved em though, beautiful and full of life as they were, two little stars in a spread of lost souls and demons.

Me? I was a mix of the latter.

No I wasn't always this way, I actually used to be a bubbly happy sunspot in my family...I can't really say when that light started to flicker out, but I know it was sometime around my teen years.

Maybe the day I lost my virginity, or the day my grandpa died, or some other horrible unplanned trauma.

But enough of that, I think as we all finished prepping and headed to meet the boys downstairs.