They didn’t leave you because they didn’t love you.
They left because when they were fourteen they had
their best friend come to them with a heart that never
healed. At fourteen they held a human being, trembling
and broken in their paper arms, and they feared the day
they would mourn a last goodbye, a last embrace. They
left because they saw how a cold flame could create a
house fire in the hollow bones of someone who gave
every inch of themselves and still came up short.
No, they didn’t leave you because they didn’t love
you. They left because when they were seventeen they
finally noticed the distance between their parents at
the dinner table. At seventeen they had to tell their
younger brother, sister, that sometimes things get
tough, that sometimes mistakes hang heavy in a rib
cage and it causes people to run away. They left because at a tender age they were taught that “I love
you” doesn’t always mean, I’ll stay.”
They didn’t leave you because they didn’t love you. They
left because at twenty-one they read an article about a
dating app that mentioned how 42% of its users already had partners. At twenty-one they read that plan
Bs and second options were always on the forefront, always in the back pocket of someone who was holding
the hand of a man, a woman, who slept soundly beside
them at night. They left because they convinced selves that there would always be another, someone
better suited, someone better looking, someone more
successful; it would only ever be a matter of time.
See, they didn’t leave you because they didn’t love
you. They left because at twenty-five they watched
their grandfather empty out the oceans within him at
the grave of his high-school sweetheart. At twenty-five
they watched how he slowly deteriorated, how loss
crept into his heart like a bleak December frost; how
the doctor said that her demise killed him before old
age ever had the chance. They left because they finally
understood how cruel it truly was to love something
that death could touch.
Trust me when I say they didn’t leave you because
they didn’t love you. They left you because they never
learned that they could be better than their past. They
left you because they couldn’t convince themselves
that they wouldn’t turn into their parents, that they
wouldn’t wake up one day and want to flee. They left
you because they never saw devotion win, they never
saw passion triumph.
No, they didn’t leave you because they didn’t love you.
They left you because they didn’t love themselves
enough to believe
that they could be different.
YOU ARE READING
The Strength in our Scars
PoetryBy Bianca Sparacino - this tackles the gut-wrenching but relatable experiences of moving on, self-love, and ultimately learning to heal. In this book you will find peace, you will find a rock, you will find understanding, and you will find hope. Rem...
