Second Ave Series: Ac-Counting on You (WLW)

Never Far from My Mind

Gwen sat down on her favorite perch of her balcony and brought her knees up to her chest after setting her coffee aside on the small table to her left. She smiled as she eyed the front cover of her latest novel and opened it after getting her blanket settled along her lower half. Bringing the reading materials to her face, she took a long whiff of new book, coffee and pastries reminiscent of the place that had opened her world. More importantly, of the person who made it possible. Over the last two days, she'd gone even further out of her habitual comfort zone and visited Brook's coffee shop on and off throughout the day.

It being so near to her home obviously helped to get her moving, but her true motivation was the woman running the establishment. Brook's easy grin filled Gwen's mind's eye and she chuckled to herself as she thought of their promise to meet later that day. Peeking over at her phone, also sitting on the small, glass table beside her rocker, she immediately wanted to call Brook and see how her morning was going. It was a peculiar sensation, desiring connectivity with more and more people as of late, though was so much greater with Brook.

Gwen wanted to know everything about her. She craved learning her favorite color, pastime outside of work or reading and possibly even major events in her life that led her to where she was now. Brook was mesmerizing. She flooded her mind when doing the most minimal of tasks, or when she was simply up to nothing at all. Gwen brought her fingers to her lips and brushed them there, recalling the way Brook's curved along hers so softly like every move she made was done carefully as if nothing but care over her wellbeing was at the forefront of her mind.

Nibbling on her bottom lip as she brought her hand to rest along her cheek and propped it on the arm of her rocker, Gwen considered how her lips may feel if they were a bit more heated. After watching one of her favorite films in her bedroom last night before sleep, she'd dreamed of something that was most definitely a little more heated. In fact, it was a lot more spicy than anything she'd ever actually experienced and now she found herself yearning to make it possible. Still, Gwen wasn't sure if that was even possible.

Never one to take the initiative, the idea of putting herself out there more than she had stirred something that bristled with a sensation she knew by heart.

Anxiety...

Not apprehension over actually connecting more with Brook as she knew that the physical would never compare to the emotional, yet anxiety nonetheless. Over what? Well, Brook had already mentioned she had dating experience. While Gwen felt a twinge of jealousy that anyone else other than her had been a part of said experiences, she knew there was no way she'd be able to make the next move to have them herself. Remembering her rather sultry dream from the night prior only made the desire to make it real even stronger and she wasn't sure if that day would ever come.

No, Gwen didn't think Brook would outright reject her. On the contrary, she surmised it would be quite the opposite and that only made things harder. Not only did Gwen feel incredibly unattractive despite Brook's best efforts to help her think otherwise, but she wasn't even sure she'd know what to do. What if her lack of know-how turned Brook off? What if she grew bored of her because of her lackluster, try-hard attempts in making their connection more physical? Most importantly, what if her dream had been wrong and she wasn't truly ready?

Gwen dropped her legs and let them hang down from the rocker, beginning to sway it back and forth as she gazed toward the early morning sky. Brook was fascinating, loving, smart. She was talented and the most genuine person she'd ever known. Gwen knew her fears were at least somewhat irrational, though that never stopped her from having them before and she released a sigh as she glanced down at her body clad in the wine red sweatpants and turtleneck Brook gave her. She slept in them most nights now and thought of the night Brook gave them to her.