That Girl

PSY 2303.003

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Vanessa~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   The bright florescence lights gave no break to my beating headache as I slumped into a desk. The only good thing about being in a class at three in the evening with an unrelenting hangover, is the free a/c. Well, not free. I'm sure my tuition is paying for it one way or another. 

   College, such a scam. 

   I had left my townhome a whole hour early just to receive some sweet release from the 104°F Texas heat. There's nothing wrong with my a/c in the house, the thermostat is just set to where it can't get any colder than 70°F degrees. Which would be fine, if it is not that my room is on the top floor and the window unit I bought won't be in for another two days.

   Okay, so maybe the blasting a/c isn't the only reason I left so early today. I sat sideways in my desk chair looking at the empty black desk diagonal of me. That was the reason. Well not the desk itself, but the girl that sat there.

   This is only the fourth time our class would be meeting for this course, but there was just something about that girl. She's beautiful, gorgeous, absolutely stunning, show-stopping kind of pretty. But it wasn't just how her tan skin brought out her brown eyes, or her black hair with bright red dyed tips that skim across her delicate shoulders that attracted me to her. It was her passion.

   Experimental and Research Methods isn't the most thrilling of courses to take. But when discussions would open up in class, she would speak with such eagerness that I can't help but be captivated by her. Something about the way she debates in such a hurry, as if she just found the answer to the most recent unsolvable psychological study, makes me want to get to know her more.

   She wants to be a therapist. I overheard her say it to her partner on day one of this course when we were forced to do some ice breakers with the person sitting next to us. I was stuck with Bethany Davis. She was pretty, but basic. Not my type of girl. Not even the type of girl I would want to make my friend. The lucky one that day was some chill guy who was in my sexuality class the previous semester. I never caught his name, but that lucky bastard got to talk to her. The girl  who, to this day, made my heart rush as soon as she stepped into the room.

   That wasn't the first time I missed my shot with her. I knew her in high school. Well, kind of knew her. The beautiful goddess' name is Marcilene. We come from the same small town, were in some of the same classes, even flirted with her some when she was a freshman and I was a sophomore.

   I really thought her and I were hitting it off at the time. We would talk when we would see each other during lunch break or before our theatre arts class would start, even after class sometimes. We even had this cute little thing that we would do where we would try to sneak up on each other and be the first to swat the other's forehead and shout, "Shouldda had a V8!" Which could have been classified as bullying to some people; but the way we would chase each other with our faces lit up and her absolutely adorable giggles, there's no way I could call this bullying.

   Well, at least I thought she was flirting with me. All up until one day I went to find her in our theater arts class and saw her in a group of guys perched up on one of their laps. That shit killed me. Broke my little gay heart. I was so sure she was interested in me; even though all my friends kept telling me to drop her, that she was straight. I didn't believe them...till then.

   After that I kind of backed off. I didn't try and chase her to win our "V8 challenge". I didn't try and initiate conversations when I saw her. I kept my eyes forward when I walked past her in the halls as her look towards me had turned colder. I would blame it on a RBF, but anytime she had looked at me prior I was always greeted with a smile and a flirtatious wave. Or I guess what I had mistook as flirtatious.