summary: jake takes a leap of faith with this blind date. warning: cursing pairing: fem!reader x jake peralta word count: 2.9k+ words
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"alright, charles, why'd you blow me off this time?"
"aw, c'mon! you know it wasn't like that," he says, shrugging off his jacket to put on the back of his chair. "i never get to see her, and i don't know how long she's in town for."
"i'm kidding, i'm kidding. but i have to say, i'm getting kinda curious. like, who's this chick? you talk about her all the time, but i've never met her."
"she's from florida."
"okay, first ick already."
charles plops down in the chair next to jake's desk. "no, no, no. she's not 'from' from florida. she lives there."
"that's not better, dude," jake shudders.
"she's a family friend."
"so, like, childhood bestie?"
"no, she's much younger than me."
"never a good sentence in any context."
"oh, my— just let me finish. i used to babysit her when i was a teenager. don't make it weird, jakey."
"wait, wait, so how old is she?"
"mm, 27? maybe 28 now? something like that, i'd say."
jake turns back to his computer, continuing to type. "okay."
out of nowhere, charles gasps, "oh, my snickerdoodles—"
"nope."
"what? i didn't even finish!"
"whenever you start a sentence with 'oh, my snickerdoodles', i always end up significantly more uncomfortable than before."
"this is a good snickerdoodles, i swear."
jake groans, throwing his head back. "fine. what's it this time?"
"okay, well, you know how you're single?"
"thanks for reminding me."
"well, she's single too!"
"charles, i'm not—"
"you see, it's perfect! and she's not even that much younger than you!"
"a: lower your voice, you're making me sound kind of like a pedo; b: no."
"why?" he whines.
"no offense, man. seriously. but you kinda suck at this stuff. i mean, last time i went on a blind date you set up, i ended up with a peacock for a pet."
"but this one's so good!"
"dude. charles. you kinda... well, it's just... you hang out with people like you. and that's not a bad thing! i just don't know if i want to date a... charles," he winces.
