Jenna on Writing

Writing Subtext: Letting Your Message Seep In

Instead of doing my usual writing tips segue of spewing out insane word counts of yap, I thought that actively showing an example could also be helpful in conveying writing hacks. Dahil ilang beses ko na rin nasabi 'to sa recent posts ko, I won't be lingering on tackling subtext for too long.

However, in a nutshell, subtext is many things. For starters, it's (1) concealing, (2) sugarcoating, (3) implying something, or (4) passive aggression. Let's focus on subtext mainly in terms of dialogue and giving the readers a life lesson through your work. The principles of subtext is similar to the principles of show don't tell; instead of getting lost in exposition and pounds of straight-up unrealistic OOC (out of character) babbling, you allow the reader to engage and infer from the narrative. The more the reader is involved, the more the reader is immersed.

I've said this before. Ang dami ko nang nakikitang works that claim to be "inspirational" pero ang way nila to convey the life lesson kuno is through (1) theatrical monologue, (2) extensive back-and-forths, or (3) straight-up melodrama, cringe at best. It's common, even in my works, especially the older ones. Despite how good your message may be, you will still run the risk of being too on the nose. Kasi, again, hindi mo hinayaang mag-isip ang reader. Nag-babble ka na lang.

If you market your book as, let's say, about academic validation (that's one of the main premises in my on-going novel rewrite) tapos kapag binasa, ang academic validation life lesson thingamajig ay nakita lang through the character having a moment blatantly saying, "Academic validation bad. Yet, I can't help but have academic validation. Here's a ten feet long list of my internal conflicts that the narrative failed to show all those chapters ago, ICMYI." That's, er, no.

Maraming ways to convey your message in beautiful, not "on the nose" ways. But, I will focus on subtext, since this is an extremely useful hack that will spice up your writing to a different level.

NOTE: Marami ring ways to use subtext, aside from this one. I highly recommend you do further research if you're invested.

NOTE AGAIN: Subtext doesn't work alone. Maganda rin 'pag nakakapag-incorporate ka rin ng other story elements.

So, 'di ko na patatagalin pa, read prose one (bad example) and two (edited) and my annotations.

PROSE ONE - from 'Paint The Skies' (2021)

This prose is from the first draft of my novel 'Paint the Skies' (now retitled as 'The Art of Science') written three years ago, 2021. Gosh, I was so young back then. Minsan din talaga depende sa edad kung ga'no kalalim ang works mo, e. Not to shame on the younger writers, but I've just observed that in my own writing. Kasi dahil mas marami na ang experiences ko, it subconsciously bled into my newer works.

Uh, anyway, this was painful to read. My main problem was this is the second chapter. Second. The story is fresh. The plot wasn't supposed to roll that much yet. Following the story circle plot arc, I should've let the initial personalities of the characters introduce themselves more kaysa ipakita ko agad na alam na ni protagonist kung ano 'yong misbelief n'ya. Para, kapag dumaloy na ang plot and conflicts challenges the character, they will be forced to contemplate and change.

Here's the Dan Harmon story circle for reference.

photo from: Reedsy Blog

Second chapter, I already failed to set that up. Alam na agad ng lola n'yo 'yong dapat ay subconscious belief lang n'ya, even though I was supposed to hide that away first because Lea must go under experiences before realizing that.

Another problem, it's too on the nose. One other issue I had with the first draft of PTS was there is too much obvious statements. As I said earlier, that's not good.

Let's apply subtext.

PROSE TWO - from 'The Art of Science' (2024)

DISCLAIMER: To those reading this who had also read PTS back in the good ol' days, super dami talaga ng nabago, hehe. Albert and Isaac are gone. I didn't need them anymore.

Before the subtext, I modified the characters to help with writing what will they imply in their dialogues and creating tension. To create tension, one effective way is to put the characters against each other. I reconstructed Mari's character to instead share the same perfectionist perspective as Lea. Thus, I can now stuff in some subtext: there are implications of their misbelief against the art field and I got to insert their tension with the other character, Mika.

Then, may bagong character rin, si Archer. She doesn't share the same principles as the two and she's worried about their well-being.

One main issue I had with my first draft was that Lea's way of carrying herself didn't really fit with the personality and beliefs I wanted her to have. Gusto kong perfectionist siya at strictly academics, pero ang open n'ya agad towards considering the latter. Gusto kong may toxic behavior siya na gustong siya lang lagi ang nasa unahan, pero never napakita 'yong kan'yang ego at ang aggression n'ya kapag nararamdamang na-t-threaten ito.

So, I applied subtext in their back-and-forths. There was the subtle passive aggression of Archer by mentioning an oddly specific fact about Isaac Newton (and also helps to convey that these are STEM inclined students). Nand'yan din ang subtle implications ng pagpunit ng papel ni Lea at ang mention ng tarpaulin. She's always unsatisfied, yet, she never straightforwardly tells us that she's unsatisfied—unlike the first prose na sinabi n'ya lang agad na gusto n'ya ng academic validation.

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I tried to explain it as best as I could, pero again, I recommend you to look up for more resources online if you want to learn further.

Keep writing!