Before Descended Afternoons (Unhinged Series # 1)

04

I didn't think staying here would still make me realize how inadequate and inept I am in several facets of life. It was almost shoved at me, and I'm having a hard time accepting it. 
 
I never enjoy thinking about other people having the best time of their lives. Yes, it is toxic, but I suppose I am still a person after all. I am still envious of other people's florid approaches to life. I could stop to adhere and refrain myself from feeling that way, but it will just consume me more, slapping me with the reality that there is a greater probability of me not having it than of experiencing it again—a fulfilling existence.

The days passed quickly. Medyo nasasanay na rin ako na maabutan ang parents ni Jere dito sa bahay nina auntie. They're really close. They're like a close friend of them. I mean, what can I do about that, really? Hindi naman ako ang may-ari ng bahay para mag-inarte. They're actually nice, too. I have no comment on that.

It was early in the morning, I was rubbing my eyes, walking down the stairs when I saw a kid playing in the living room, his toys scattered on the floor.

I blinked for a few times, trying to wake myself up in case I'm still sleeping. What's a kid doing here?

"Good morning."

"What are you doing here?" It was Jere. Lumipat ang tingin ko sa bata. Tapos inilipat ko rin sa kanya na nakatayo sa harapan ko. They looked alike.

"Grabe, wala man lang good morning? What are you doing here agad?"

Hindi ko pinansin ang sinabi niya. I ruffled my hair and fixed it, while watching the kid put a piece of biscuit inside the toy car.

"Hindi kayo umuwi kagabi?" I asked instead.

"Oo. Kami lang naiwan. Nakatulog kasi itong kapatid ko, kailangan kong samahan."

Their parents had a little dinner last night here with uncle and auntie. Then they started drinking, I think. That's the last time I saw what's happening here downstairs before I locked myself up in my room. I didn't know Jere and his brother came afterwards.

Tumango na lang ako at dumiretso sa kusina. I searched the cupboard and took a box of cereal there. I put it in a bowl and poured milk on it. Manang is not here today so I had to prepare my own food. Both auntie and uncle have work so I'll be alone here for the whole day, I guess.

"What?" I asked. Nakatayo lang kasi siya roon sa may pinto. Parang sira.

"Gusto mong gumala?"

"No."

He chuckled. Tinaasan ko siya ng kilay. What's his problem?

"Tignan mo." He showed me his phone. I squinted. It's a text message from auntie saying Jere should take me to their house because I would be left alone in the house and no one's going to prepare my food. She's on it again. Forcing me to hangout with this guy.

"Just ignore that. I can take care of myself." I said, although knowing I would eat a sandwich for lunch and an orange juice.

I know how to cook, okay? I just didn't have it in me to cook and prepare something. I'm not in the mood. And I won't die if I don't eat anything with rice for today.

He put his phone in his pocket and crossed his arms. "Pero kailangan mo talaga sumama. Pinapasama ka ni mama, eh."

"Why?"

"Anong why? Wala lang. Trip lang?"

Tinalikuran ko siya at lumabas gamit ang backdoor, dala ang cereal. I ate it while walking towards the wooden chair and sat on it after.

"Aino, please? Tara. Ibinilin ka ni tita, eh. Ipakilala rin kita sa mga kaibigan ko."

Ibinilin? Ano ako, sanggol?