The long jump

watching her

From the moment I got her number...I haven't texted her once..which is bitchy because I mean I'm the one who asked for it but she's just too pretty I can't possibly talk to a goddess like her but it's been weeks and I can't just not see her right? and beside I miss my little stalker she used to be around so much back then before I had her number I mean I even got gifts from her like candy, letters, cologne! I miss it so much, I check her plan book for this find evening and it shows me that she'll be at the store working the night shift. I park next to her in the back by employment parking, her car looks nicely painted next to mine, oh how I've missed  her little black car! I walk around to the front door to the store so I don't seem weird or suspicious at all because the last thing I wanna do is get kicked out of the only place I see her at anymore, she's probably seen me spying on her from yesterday because now she's being more careful with being out late or getting ready for  her night-shifts lately, I've noticed a lot of big changes in the patterns she takes when going on walks night or day. It's weird it's like my little bunny is avoiding me...I hope not or i'll be sad so sad that I might visit while she's sleeping at night..you know she sleeps so peacefully at night probably dreaming of me..not she has too be dreaming of me because she's not allowed to dream about another man. I am the only one she'll ever get to love in her life. she can only love me...I need her to look at me..I need her to want me...I miss my needy little angel back. 

I watch as she stocks a shelf with a boy. She's not allow to hang out with boys, that's my rule but to be fair I never told her that but she should know that because she is mine and only mine. I need her, I want her, why can't she see that? I mean I do so much just for her.  I do everything for her from taking photos of her, to watching her sleep...I mean I need to protect her, she's little and small so she needs me. She can't get rid of me even if she tried, I can't believe my pretty angel is ignoring me...like must be torture for her not being able to talk or get close to me because she loves me so much. I miss my angel so much and I miss her sneaking around me thinking I didn't realize it, how cute but this is childish to me because she means so much to me. I wonder how she's living without me- her life line- because she used to cry on the days that she couldn't see me but I knew like I always knew like I know everything, I miss when she was like that. I watch slowly as she moves from shelf to shelf putting things on shelves and taking off expired things from the shelves, the way she sways her hips with so much rhythm that it's putting me in a trance. I wonder if she even knows that i'm here because I hope she does..I am getting her a gift which is a bouquet of flowers as an apology for no texts or calls, 'I hope she can forgive me..' are the only thoughts that run in my mind at this moment in time. I need her to forgive me...I need her...I want her. I watch as she stares at me, maybe she's finally realizing how much she actually misses me. She has to miss me. 

I wonder if she misses as much I miss her, I wish she could see how much I missed her...I've been watching her and I noticed that she barely leaves the house anymore...her apartment is clean and tidy which is a first in a while...I never seen this part of her before, it's like I don't even know her anymore, I feel like she changed so much in the time that she was gone. I miss her smile, her touch, her gifts,...her in general. I wonder if she's dreaming when she sleeps...I walk into the aisle that she is restocking in, I start to get closer and closer to her slowly...very slowly. I smile at her and grab her favorite type of chocolates. I feel her starring but  I act like I don't notice because this is the first actually attention she's given me in a while! I wonder if she knows she starring, she used to stare without even realizing it, I love when she stares...her eyes feel so safe and soft to me, while gaze is also a blessing for me like a goddess like STARRING at me a weak and horrible person...she LOVES  so much that she looks at her with love and need...I feel like I could take her away and just keep her to myself...forever and ever..never letting go. I NEED HER TO SEE HOW MUCH I NEED HER