To Be Alive At All Is To Have Scars (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)

Chapter Eight

The following day, Iruka finds himself roaming the streets of Konoha. His stomach is churning- in a good way, weirdly enough. Most people describe the feeling as 'butterflies', which he isn't sure is quite right. It feels more like the excitement of jumping to the ground from somewhere high up and feeling his stomach drop after, when he thinks about Kakashi and the friendly outing they had on Ichiraku. Since he didn't propose it as a date, he doesn't see it as one, but... It's progress, and even if Kakashi doesn't fall in love with him, becoming Kakashi's friend is one step closer to that.

So, he's excited- even more so as he looks around the village and sees signs advertising the end of summer festival that happens in the village each year. The streets are lined with stands being set up, and the smell of fresh festive food being cooked wafts through the air. The festival is supposed to start tonight at sunset. Lots of people go with friends, family, or lovers, so he figures asking Kakashi would be a wonderful idea.

When he gets to Kakashi's apartment, he knocks on the door, only for it to swing open less than a second later. Kakashi stands in the doorway in his Jonin uniform with a bag on his back. Iruka briefly wonders if the man is going to train, but before he can dwell on it too hard, he decides to get what he knows is going to be the most difficult part of this interaction out of the way.

"Kakashi, would you like to go to the summer festival with me tonight?" He asks, albeit a bit awkwardly.

"Sorry, but no," Kakashi bluntly answers. Iruka's stomach drops once more- except in the bad way, this time. Iruka is unable to help how he frowns. Kakashi must notice, because he quickly rushes to fix it while gesturing to the packed bag sitting on his back. "I mean- I want to- It's just... I have to go on a mission and while it's not very far from the village, I can't assure you that I'd be back in time. I was actually just about to head out when you knocked on my door."

Iruka crosses his arms.

"Since when do you have a problem with being late?"

"I'd like to avoid being late if it's to spend time with you," Kakashi breathes out, and before Iruka can respond, the Jonin slips past him, shuts the door to his apartment, and rushes down the stairs of the complex.

"Oh... Well, maybe next time," Iruka sighs. "I guess I can still go with Naruto."

~

Early that evening, Iruka sits in the chair in his bedroom and stares at himself in the mirror as he gets ready for the festival. Naruto is in his doorway, watching Iruka put his father's old earrings in and fix his hair into a bun.

"Iruka, what's wrong?" Naruto questions.

Iruka shakes his head. The interaction with Kakashi is still fresh in his mind even though it was hours ago. Kakashi had a mission to go on and obviously their work is more important than Iruka's silly crush. Still, Iruka can't help how hurt his feelings are- and how disappointed he is that he's going to this festival alone for the eighth year in a row since he's become an adult.

"It's nothing, Naruto, don't worry about it."

"Oh, c'mon! You suck at lying, y'know that?" Naruto tactlessly points out and wander's into Iruka's room. "Just tell me what it is so I can help you out!"

"Fine, but don't be mad at me, and don't say anything to Kakashi."

"Huh? What's this got to do with Kakashi?"

"Well... I've been looking for my soulmate for a long time, but I have no idea who it is. I've decided I'd like to move on for now and try dating, because there's a good chance I'll never find my soulmate- they could be across the world for all I know."