melancholy of haruhi suzumiya fics

Haruhi thinks an inflatable alien is a real alien then falls in with M&M plushs

It was another weekday afternoon, which meant another SOS Brigade meeting, but it started off differently. As Kyon entered, he saw everyone wearing birthday hats and a giant banner that went across the whole room that said, "Alien found!1!!!1!!1!".

"Hello, Kyon, After so long, we finally found an unusual being: John the alien.” Haruhi said while hugging John.

“Not to be that guy, but that's just an inflatable alien."

"That's not an inflatable alien; that's just John the alien; he's very cool and tubular."

"It won't be so cool and tubular when I grab a pin to pop it and prove it's just an inflatable alien and nothing more."

"Sorry to butt in, but I baked some cookies for the club to share." Mikuru shyly said.

"Go ahead and put them on the table so we can each grab one."

"Okay.”

Mikuru grabbed a nearby tray and placed the cookies on it before sitting back down. Haruhi grabbed a bunch and started putting them near John the alien's mouth, thinking it would eat them, but instead it just resulted in a whole lot of crumbs on the ground.

"Hey Mikuru could you please be a dear and clean up after John the alien?"

"Okay, j-just give me a moment."

Mikuru quickly grabbed a dustpan and started cleaning up the crumbs.

"Hey, Haruhi, look, bigfoot is behind you.”

She turned, giving Kyon the chance to grab a pin. “I don't see hi-” but before Haruhi could finish speaking, Kyon had popped John the alien, which not only freighted Mikuru but also meant she had more to clean up. "Oh, that's gore, gore of my comfort character.”

“So you see, Haruhi, it wasn't a real alien; it was just an inflatable one.”

Yuki turned the page of her book before closing it and announcing, “What if the real John the alien were the friends we made along the wa-"

"No, there is only one John the alien, and Kyon the meanie murdered him; actually, I'm calling the police. Get ready to serve life in prison, you big meanie!"

Kyon took a seat and sighed. "Alright, I'll sit here till they come arrest me for this “crime” against humanity.”

"You think I'm joking? Just look it up on your phone. Alien murder has been outlawed ever since last week."

"Don't you mean search it up on the computer?"

"Phones have web browsers now, don't they?"

"Haruhi, this is 2006; no one here has a phone with a web browser."