Confused By You: Niall's Story

•11•

The unusual brightness of the room woke me from my drugged slumber and I felt weak for a moment, and then ten times stronger than I have for almost two days. I was back in a normal hospital room, but I was alone. Where was Liam? He promised to be there when it was over! I was close to ripping my hair out with worry and hurt when he came through the door with...food! I hadn't had the hospital food but I hear things, so I don't really want to. My worry was immediately replaced with joy as Liam sat down next to me.

"The doctors said you should be awake soon, so I figured I would go grab some food while I had the chance. I'm sorry I wasn't here when you woke, Nialler," he gave me an apologetic look that made my heart melt and all thoughts of scolding him left my brain like dandelion seeds blowing away in the wind. I gladly accepted the breakfast sandwich and tea he handed me, scarfing down the food in a heartbeat.

"So, how're you feeling?" he asked after swallowing a mouthful of food.

"A little sore, but a lot better," I smiled, and Liam finished off his breakfast and engulfed my hand in his. He didn't entwine our fingers the way I liked, but the soft kiss he gave me made up the difference.

~

The next day I was free to leave the hospital. Liam made me promise never to hurt myself again, and I did just that. I learned self harm isn't a way out, but only a temporary way to cover up the real pain inside. But like the flavor of gum, it wears off and leaves you regretting it.

My life...is perfect. There's no other way to describe it. Maybe I lived with my captor, had no parents, spent my days bored in a massive house with nothing to do, but I had Liam and that was what mattered. Of course I still hadn't been able to bring myself to say I loved him, but it would come eventually. My personality has improved, as well. I was no longer a sad, confused fool, but instead a fun loving, carefree fool. Liam's love was why made me feel on top of the world, even if I couldn't return the favor...yet.

The truth is, life will be filled with unanswered questions. It'll throw you in all kinds of different directions, leave you with no where to go, but the loose ends always tie up. I couldn't ever see myself giving up again like I had so many times before. And that road? It never stops turning. There's always bumps and the occasional dead end. You don't have a destination, but that's not what life's about. It's the journey that matters, and I don't care how much of a deep idiot I sound like right now, because it's the truth. And I'm not skimpy when it comes to the truth. If life had a specific place it wanted you to be then you'd be there. But which turn you take when there's a fork in the road is what gets you places. It's your own choices that take you where you want to be, or don't want to. And I've made a lot of damn mistakes, and taken a lot of wrong turns, but at least I was brave enough to travel the opposite direction on a one way street. Because if there's one thing I chose right, it was Liam.

The boy who could take my breath away just by breathing himself. The boy whose slightest touch made my heartbeat quicken significantly. The boy whose chocolate brown eyes, tufts of brunette hair that curled when they got too long, strange fear of spoons, full pink lips, and even the weird way he played with my hair so much, made my insides fill with butterflies. He makes me so happy, and I want to be with him every minute of every day. Is that how you tell if you love someone? If they can make your heart melt just by looking at you? We'll see.

~

*1 year later*

"Niall, I have a surprise for you," Liam whispered, the feeling of his warn breath on my neck sending an involuntary shiver down my spine. I allowed him to lead me through the halls of the company headquarters, turning corners and pushing through doors. This wasn't the first time I'd been able to actually see the place over the time we'd been together. Sometimes Liam let me come to work with him just like it used to be.

He tugged me into a round room, in which the walls were lined with all kinds of instruments. It ranged from drum sets to clarinets, and there were all different types.

"This is technically a storage room, and we use these for recording in the booths," Liam explained. He led me farther in and my eyes widened at the sight of an entire line of guitars I never would've dreamed of touching.

"Go pick one out," he gave me a little shove forward, and I stumbled because of the surprise that was overwhelming my body. I ran my gads of the smooth surface of an expensive Gibson, and couldn't stop touching each and every one of the many types splayed out in front me. I finally decided on a shiny acoustic, picking it up as if it would shatter at the gentlest touch.

"What am I picking one for, again?" I asked, surprised I was even able to speak properly.

"Well...you're going to play for me. And sing," Liam informed me. I shook my head.

"No," I refused. Liam gave me his best puppy dog face, but I squeezed my eyes shut, shaking my head back and forth.

"If you do it, you can keep the guitar," Liam countered. That did it, and I didn't even need the puppy eyes. I slung the guitar strap over my shoulder an looked patiently at Liam, who gestured to some wooden stools in a corner. Once we were seated, I strummed a few soft notes to make sure the guitar was tuned correctly.

Though my eyes were trained on the chords I was hitting, I could practically feel Liam's smile on me as I began to sing shyly.

"Do you hear me?

I'm talking to you

Across the waters, across the deep blue

Ocean, under the open sky, oh my

Baby I'm trying," I sang. I continue strumming when Liam took over the next part, his smooth voice filling the small room.

"Boy, I hear you

In my dreams

I feel you whisper

Across the sea

I keep you with me in my heart

You make it easier when life gets hard..." we sang the chorus in harmony.

We continued belting out the lyrics of the duet, the song that Liam sang the day before my life took more ups and downs than ever. We'd been through so much together over all this time. As I strummed the last note on the beautiful guitar, I turned to look Liam in his warm eyes. He met my blue orbs with happiness flooding his entire face, his entire body.

"Hey, Liam?" I asked timidly. He acknowledged me with a warm smile, nodding to tell me to go on.

"I-I think that I maybe love you a little. A lot," I smiled sheepishly. I'd said it, and I meant it with every fraction of my heart. His eyes lit up and then proceeded to fill with tears, of joy I hoped.

Liam crushed me in a tight embrace and gently pressed a kiss to my temple.

"I love you, too Niall. And nothing will ever change that," he replied, his voice a bit choked up. I rested my head on the brunette boy's shoulder, inhaling his scent.

This was the best moment of my enire life. Saying those three words, and meaning them, felt so extremely good. It put an entire new perspective on what I thought of Liam. Now he wasn't just my boyfriend. He was my boyfriend who I loved. That's right, I absolutely loved him and I should've known it'd be like this since the day I met him. I remover when I would argue with my inner concience and I wondered how on earth I could deny my feeling for so long. This just do meant to be that I didn't have words. And I didn't need them.

•••

I. Am. Dead. HE SAID IT. HE SAID IT GOD DAMMIT. and also...it's over. This is the end. I'm thinking of adding an epilogue type thing a few years forward when you know Harry had Louis and stuffs. Im sad :'( why is it overrrr now what will I do with my life?!?! I suppose I could sleep. It's late And I have to get up oh so early. Bye lovelies! Have a wonderful time sleeping! I know I will ;)

~Brooklyn