First Light

Harry

"Every person I killed I strongly believe that they were bad. When I do go face God there is going to be lots of things I will have to account for but killing any of those people is not one of them." – Chris Kyle.

When you're in the middle of a war and there's not much to do in your free time, you find yourself reading a lot. Besides all of those organizations you hear about that send food and blankets and items such as those to us on a regular basis, there are also a fair amount of books that get sent.

Ironically, or maybe cruelly, enough, about half the books people send end up having something to do with war. Whether it be fiction or non-fiction, biography or auto-biography, there's always something to do with shooting and killing. Typically I toss them aside for some other poor soul to read if they really have nothing better to do than to read about things that could possibly happen to them. I enjoy the fiction books most, being able to get somewhat lost in a different world while I'm off duty.

But there was one war auto-biography that I gave a shot, entitled "American Sniper" by Chris Kyle, from where I got the quote above. I'd heard about him, that he had the single highest recorded sniper kills by an American troop in history. The sad part is, he survived all four tours that he made overseas only to go back home to his wife and children and be shot in the back by a fellow former soldier. That's scarier to think about than being shot out here honestly. At least out here if you die then they can come and tell your family that the enemy killed you, that your death was their fault. But how would it feel to hear that your loved one was murdered a few miles away from you, in the place where you thought they'd finally be safe from the violence that they'd been surrounded by for God knows how long. Not only that, but to be shot by someone who took the same oath as your loved one, to fight for and protect everyone in their country, and then betraying them in the worst way. –H.S.

"Styles! Get your ass over here and help me beat Malik in poker!" My head turns up and slightly to the right, seeking out the voice that demanded my attention. Liam was looking at me, the frustration evident on his face as he pleaded for help. Zayn was smiling to himself on the other side of the table, eyes scanning over his cards before he looked up at me as well, neutral as always. "That's an order soldier," my attention diverted back to Liam who had a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. I chuckled quietly as I got up, walking over to where the two men were sitting. I drug another chair over next to Liam's side, the legs of it screeching almost painfully as I did.

"Poker huh?" I ask as I look over Liam's hand and shake my head. "You got dealt a shitty hand mate, there's no way in hell you're going to win." I chuckle and lean back, folding my hands behind my head. Liam frowns and looks at the cards in his hand, then back to me.

"What? I thought it was pretty good." He says, trying to reevaluate the value of his hand.

"It sucks," I repeat calmly. Liam sighs and nods; Zayn smiles and sets his hand down, nodding at Liam to do the same. His smile quickly turns sour though when Liam lays down his hand.

"Hey!" he says and looks over at me. "You said his hand sucked." I chuckle and draw random patterns on the table.

"I'm a damn liar, you should know that by now Malik." I tease him. Liam meanwhile is grinning from ear to ear.

"Thanks Styles!" he exclaims heartily, clapping me on the back. "Just for that I'll get you some extra food tomorrow," he teases as he gathers the cards back into a pile. I chuckle and am about to answer when suddenly Louis comes in, sulkily and quietly taking a seat by Zayn. Both characteristics were quite unlike him so it was easy to see that something was wrong. I didn't really like confrontation, and Zayn knew him better so I figured he would take the lead on this one maybe; or Liam even since it was sort of part of his job description to take charge.

"What's up with you mate?" Zayn asks like I expected him to. Louis doesn't respond for a minute before finally groaning a little and running his hand through his short hair.

"You know, we're the ones who are in hell over here," he starts speaking, and part of me wants to flee at the direction this conversation seems to be heading. I hated when people talked about this place, I didn't want to think and/or hear about it. I was here and that was it, nothing to discuss as far as I'm concerned. Louis continued though, oblivious to our somewhat obvious discomfort at how he began his rant. "We are the ones in hell, yet she's the one who apparently 'can't handle' having a long distance relationship." he continues and it clicks for all of us then. Eleanor must have broken up with him, and over the phone nonetheless. That was a shitty way for this to happen, although I don't think I would've wanted to go home if I was him, excited to see her, only for her to tell me that she wasn't interested anymore.

"I'm sorry Louis," Liam speaks up, sincerity laced in his voice, and I know that he's thinking about how he would feel if his girlfriend did this to him. Even if he was our sergeant, I knew Liam would be crushed if that ever happened, and most likely wouldn't even want to leave his bed.

"Not your fault Payno," Louis sighs, rubbing his hand on the stubble that had begun to appear on his chin. "I just don't understand how she thinks this is harder for her than it is for me," he says before letting out a breath. "But what's done is done, there's nothing I can do about it yeah?" he asks rhetorically, seemingly trying to psyche himself up.

"That's right," Zayn agrees and then nods at me with a light smile "now you, Harry, and Niall can all start a single club," he offers in hopes of making Louis feel at least a little better. Louis laughs a little, although it seems somewhat forced.

"We'll see, one step at a time," Louis tells him and noogies Zayn's hair with his knuckled playfully. Zayn scoffs a little and reaches up to fix his hair from habit before putting his hand back down when he realizes there's nothing to fix. Danny comes in off of his shift and over to our table, speaking to all of us but facing Liam.

"Sir, we've detected some abnormal heat signals in the area," he tells him "You may want to put out extra guards for the night, just my opinion." Danny suggests, still maintaining a professional aura around his sergeant. Liam nods and signals at me.

"Styles go and find Horan, you, him, and I will all take the night shift, Malik and Tomlinson can take over in the morning." His sergeant side came out smoothly as he took charge of the situation, dismissing Danny of his duty while I went to the bunks to find Niall. He was in bed as I suspected, he liked getting extra sleep when he could most days, as long as the cafeteria didn't feed him any sugary foods. I go over and shake his shoulder gently until he stirs, sitting up quickly,  and alert as he was trained to be.

"We got extra guard duty," I explain. "Danny and Josh picked up on some heat signals in the area." By the time I'd finished explaining Niall was already out of bed and fixing his uniform, making sure he had everything he needed before following me back to where Payne was waiting for us. So we walked out together, guns heavy on our backs as we all silently prayed we wouldn't need to use them.