Soukoku Oneshots

What I Didn't Say

Angst

Odasaku was dead. It'd happened hours ago, but Dazai still hadn't recovered from the shock, he sat on his bedroom floor, eyes wide and shoulders shaking. He didn't cry. He couldn't.

But suddenly, there was a sharp knock on the door, forcing Dazai out of his trance.

"Go away." His reply was muttered, like he didn't even have the energy to say more than those two words.

"It's my room, you can't tell me to leave." The person outside said, clearly scoffing and rolling his eyes.

Oh. Chuuya.

Dazai didn't say anything after that, but Chuuya turned the doorknob and entered the room, where he was greeted by the sight of Dazai, sitting on the floor with blood all over his palms, staining his usual bandages red as well.

"What the fuck?" Chuuya jumped at the amount of red on Dazai, it dripped on the floor, on his clothes, everywhere.

Chuuya immediately rushed to the bathroom and brought out some tissue paper that was damp with water and kneeled down next to the other.

"Put out your hands." He ordered.

Dazai didn't reply, or hold out his hands.

"Dazai. What happened?" The redhead's voice was half of concern, half annoyance, he ducked his head to look at Dazai's unreadable expression.

When he received no answer, Chuuya sighed and reached down, grabbing Dazai's wrist and bringing it forward, to gently wipe the blood off his fingers.

But to his surprise, when the paper was all dyed red, Dazai's hands were pristine, not a trace of injuries on his pale skin.

Chuuya looked at his clean hands. Then he looked up at Dazai.

"Don't bother." The other said, still not looking up.

Chuuya sprung up from the floor, "'Don't bother'?! One, you're my partner, I'm supposed to bother. Two, you're in our room covered in someone else's blood and won't say a thing!" Chuuya shouted, pissed that his will to help was met with this attitude.

"It's Oda." Chuuya froze.

"What..?" His reply was slightly stuttered, his eyes wide.

"Oda's dead." Dazai specified, his voice still unfeeling but his heart was about to explode with grief.

Chuuya opened his mouth and then paused. He sat back down next to his partner, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"Hey Mackerel. It wasn't your fault. You couldn't have done anything." Chuuya attempted to reassure him, when his own arm was trembling, his words were also shaky.

"THAT'S WHY! I COULDN'T DO ANYTHING!" Dazai suddenly screamed, grabbing his head with both hands, getting bits of blood Chuuya missed into his fluffy brown strands.

"I can't even cry for him now." Dazai mumbled, lowering his hands and covering his eyes as his whole body shook. When he finally removed his hands, his eyes were still dry, but the light in that usually glowy amber had faded.

"Cry. If that's what you want, why can't you?" Chuuya questioned, taking his hand off Dazai's shoulder and looking straight at his face.

"I don't think I'm human, Chuuya. I can't cry." The brunette whispered, his voice laced with both denial and ignorance.

A vein popped in Chuuya's forehead. He'd always wanted to be considered human, even with his wretched power of Corruption, and here Dazai was, without that burden, and still spouting such bullshit.