I need a quiet place where i can scream how i love you.

4. Wet Swings and Thunderstorms

(SOPHIE'S POV)

I woke up at.. surprise, surprise, 2 in the morning. I sat up in my bed- i feel lightheaded.. i feel like I can't breathe.

I started hyperventilating, trying to get as much air in my lungs as possible. I try to stand up but i just feel worse. I felt so heavy. I just decided to lay back down.

I needed fresh air. I needed it. I opened up my window, but I didn't feel anything change.

At this point I'm frantically trying to fix myself.

...fix myself. I need to fix myself. I need to feel better-

I cut, and i scratch.

As i see the blood gently ooze down my skin i feel a tad bit better. I felt some sort of comfort, of familiarity.

...

I felt at peace.

...

But there's still something nagging at me.

...
I needed to go outside. I needed to.

I grab my stuff, knowing i was going to the park and back.

I open my window and jump.

(JENNY'S POV)

I knew it was a bad idea to go to the park at night, but I didn't care. I had finished any school work that needed to be done. I just wanted to get out of my house. I don't feel safe, this is my escape. But i still have to come back. Back to this hellhole. Every night.

As i walk through the dimly lit streets, approaching the park, i hear a bit of thunder. I didn't mind, sure the water was going to suck but I can't say i would rather go home than be stuck it the cold, wet rain.

I finally arrived and just sat on one of the swings.

(SOPHIE'S POV)

I walked to the park, slightly limping from the jump.. i think i rolled my ankle. I heard thunder, now im excited to get to the park.

As i walk up to the park i hear the creaking of the swing set. Someone is already here. That upset me.

I get to the park and notice... it's.. what was her name..? Janelle? No.. i know its sometimes J... Julia? No.. Jani? Thats not even a name.. is it? I don't know.. it would be stupid to name your kid Jani.. thats a bit mean... what was i thinking about?

Oh yeah.! Her name..

Was it.. Jenna? Or Jenny..?

Oh! Its Jenny!

She suddenly spoke to me, that startled me..

"why are you here?" She asked

I couldn't help but think she hates me...

"Uh.. i just wanted some fresh air.. why are you here..?" I reply, trying to seem as calm as possible.

"Same reason... but shouldn't you just stay home, you're concussed after all.." she answered. Why was she quizzing me, this is too much stress.

Tears blur my vision. Why am i crying? Nothing happened.

But she seems so mad.. I can't do this..

"well? are you gonna answer?" She says, her tone harsh.

"um.. y-yeah.. i.." i took a deep breath to calm myself "i guess I wasn't thinking to clearly."

My voice sounded shaky

"You're a bit of a dumbass, aren't you?" She chuckles lightly

"Yeah.. i guess so.." i reply, answering her question this time.

She gave me a weird look "That was rhetorical. You aren't supposed to answer."

The tears fill my eyes again.

She got mad at me for not understanding but then she's also mad at me for responding.

The tear start to fall.

I start to sniffle.

She noticed.

"Are you seriously crying?"

I try to wipe my tears, to hide the shake in my voice.

"No.." i say, no matter how hard i try to hide the shake it still there.

"Sit. On a swing. Now." She commands.

I hesitantly sat on one of the cold swings, right before the rain starts to pour.

"God damn it.." she grumbled, not seeming happy about the rain. "Why are you out here when you have a concussion?" Her voice still sharp.

"I don't know, i'm sorry.."

"Oh my god.." she mutters

"You're lying. Tell me. Tell me the truth." She demands.

I took a deep breath.

"You're not my therapist." I said as i walked away.

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