𝐓𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐌𝐞 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞

𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞.

"He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away"

- Revelation 21:4

____
Joshua

I started to realize at a young age that life could change at any moment.

One minute, you're running through the park with your parents—laughing, carefree—and the next, you're staring at the blank wall of a hospital room, holding your three-year-old brother's hand at just twelve years old.

We waited for our parents to wake up.
Minute after minute passed.
But I guess it was too good to be true.

The car crash that took their lives became my first real lesson:

Life is short.
So live in every moment.

But even now, I still ask myself...

What exactly am I living for?

After the accident, my grandmother took us in.
She got custody and did everything she could to keep us whole.

Me and my brother—Trey—we grieved differently.

Trey found comfort in the church. That became his safe place, his peace.

I was proud of him for that. Watching the light return to his eyes was the one bright spot in that season.

But for me?
Church didn't do anything but make me feel more broken.

I couldn't stand the way people looked at me—so full of pity.
Always asking,
"Are you okay?"
"How you holding up?"

Truth was, I wasn't trying to hear all that.

So I turned inward.
I became a worker, a goal-getter, a hustler.
The "man of the house."
At just twelve years old.

And I held that title like it was my identity.
I had to prove that life could still move forward, even after heartbreak.
I couldn't be a kid anymore—I had responsibilities.

By the time I was 14, I had side jobs.
By 16, I was contributing to the bills.
It wasn't much, but it mattered.

Still...
Who was I really kidding?

By 18, I felt helpless.
Like life had passed me by.

I was burnt out.
Exhausted.
In crisis.

My grandmother saw it, even when I tried to hide it.
She always did.
She used to say, "You can't keep nothing from me, baby—even when you try."

She'd invite me to church with her and Trey, just gently.
No pressure.
But I always said no.

I'd grown so used to doing things alone,
To relying on me...
I didn't think I needed anyone else.
Not people.
Not even God.

I shut everyone out.
And in doing so, I hurt the very people who loved me most.

I wasn't there for my brother when he needed me.
Wasn't present for my grandmother in her moments of worry.

Because I thought that providing was enough.
That staying strong meant staying silent.

By 18, I got into college.
Earned my bachelor's in business and entrepreneurship.
Then went to barber school—got licensed.
Opened up my first shop at 24.

Now I'm 27.
My barbershop is one of the most popular in town.
I've built a name.
I've built success.

But sometimes, late at night when everything gets quiet...
I realize I'm still missing something.

The motivation is there.
The success is there.
But love?
Love isn't.

And I don't just mean romance—
I mean real love.
Soft love.
Safe love.
God's love.

I thought I had it all figured out.
But now I see—I don't know the first thing about what it means to be loved.

So where do I even begin?
How do you search for something...
You've never truly known?

______

Authors note ‼️

Hi everybody🥰

This book is my baby and i'm putting a lot of effort and heart into what i'm writing. Hopefully you feel the love of God through the chapters.

Love y'all lots and thank you for reading❤️

"Teach me how to love"
by Favor🤍