too young, too thoughtless: a marauder's era fanfiction

chapter two

TW: physical abuse and generally shitty father-ness

Remus hated going home, though he loved seeing his mother. She had been ill for years now and getting to see her alive always felt like a gift he hadn't earned. However, visiting her came with the added consequence of living with his father - that, he did not like.

"Remus," Lyall Lupin said, "When you finish making supper, eat in your room. I wish to keep my appetite tonight."

Remus clenched his hand around the wooden spoon. How easy it would be to swing it, hot grease, and all, directly into his father's crooked nose. How simple to drag his sharp nails across his father's eyes, too similar to Remus' own for comfort. So nice to imagine taking his teeth and -

"Remus!" His father snapped, "Did you hear me or are you deaf as well as a beast now?"

"Yes, sir, I'll get out of your sight the second this is done. Apologies for being your hideous little beast so openly."

The smack to the back of his head was expected.

"Don't speak to me like you are any better than I am. You disgust me and you've doomed your mother to her death! She can't stand to have you as a son, not after what you have become."

"What I've become?" Remus asked, laughing a little hysterically, "I have become a monster because you made me this way! This...is your fault. You doomed my mother to death. You!"

Lyall's fist connected with Remus' chin in an instant, but Remus hit him just as hard with the spoon like he had wished to earlier. Lyall yelled in pain. He quickly dragged Remus forward by his shirt, so close they could feel each other's breaths.

"You will leave and not come back. Do you understand me, you idiot beast?"

"Crystal clear."

"I wish you had died in that attack."

Remus brushed the blood from his lip as he left for his room to pack as many of his things as he could. Before he left, he gave his mother a final goodbye, hoping she was too far gone to understand why.

Upon arriving at Hogwarts and checking himself back in with McGonagall, Remus tried his best not to wake anyone in his haste to get to bed. The blood had dried on his face, but he hadn't cleaned it off just yet. It was proof that something had happened, proof he wasn't a liar. He needed the proof for himself in the morning.

"What the hell have you got yourself into?" Sirius Black asked as he entered.

Remus groaned in annoyance.

"Piss off, I'm not in the mood."

Sirius came forward, smirking.

"Get in a tiff, did you?"

"More than a tiff, not that you care. Let me sleep or I'll make a ruckus."

Sirius Black grabbed his arm before he could move away, making Remus wince and shove him. The other boy didn't seem to care or was truly dim, because he grabbed Remus by the face and inspected him.

"Does it hurt badly?"

"About as much as a split lip always hurts. What, are you going to play parent and kiss it better?" Remus mocked.

Sirius Black did just that, leaning forward and landing a kiss right on Remus' chin. Suddenly, Remus would rather be anywhere but in his own dorm. He needed to take a trip to the Slytherin dorms, immediately, actually. It was of such importance that he turned around and left without so much as a word to the boy who had just kissed him. Remus fled down the stairs and to the dungeons. He knocked and knocked on the entrance until finally someone appeared. They took one look at him and sighed.

"Regulus or Snape?"

Remus blinked, suddenly wondering how bad he must look for them to not even put up a pretense of hating a Gryffindor.

"Right," they said, "Regulus. One moment."

Remus was only left in the hall for a few minutes before Regulus was pushing the entrance open and flooding into Remus' arms. He pulled away after a split second, glanced around the corridor, then hugged Remus again. When he pulled back for good, his eyes zeroed in on the fresh bruise and dried blood Remus' face was sporting.

Wordlessly, Regulus dragged him to the nearest sink and they both sat themselves upon the countertop.

"Tell me everything," Regulus demanded. As Remus struggled to string together a good enough explanation, the younger boy began to gently clear Remus' face of blood. Their faces gradually became closer and closer, until they mirrored Sirius Black and Remus' position from minutes ago.

"I said I would be fine," Remus said, adding, "I guess I lied."

"I guess you did," Regulus whispered. He gently worked his fingers through Remus' hair, detangling the knots that had formed after days of not combing it. "I won't hold it against you. Not your fault your father is an awful man."

"He kicked me out. I don't know if he meant it."

"You're fourteen! How could he?"

"I'm also a hideous beast," Remus reminded him.

Regulus shot him a fierce glare.

"Don't you dare start this, Remus. I won't let you fall into some awful hole just because Lyall Lupin wishes it."

Remus carefully leaned forward until he could rest his forehead against Regulus' shoulder. Regulus went from detangling his hair to just petting it, soothing Remus in a way he couldn't remember ever being soothed.