Miscellaneous Character Oneshots + Headcanons

Home • Reader x Harley Quinn • IMAGINE

Word Count: 1158

You always knew Harley was a horrific criminal that had once long worked with THE Joker, but that somehow didn't bother you. At least not anymore.

You first met when you had just arrived in Gotham. It was the only place close enough and cheap enough to live. And growing up with a crazy conspiracy theorist dad somehow convinced you that all the chaos Hotham was famous for just wasn't as bad as it was portrayed. God, you were so dead wrong. The DAY you had moved into your new apartment, The Riddler struck. You were so fucking scared, it was comical.

Of course you never felt safe. But it would have to suffice for now. Just for now. Very soon you hoped to skedaddle. You made it work.

One night, you exited your work building to find your tires slashed and your car robbed. Huh?? Was this a targeted attack or just a random carjacking? You didn't want to stick around to find out. Taxi prices were a bitch in Gotham and you didn't want to spend an arm and a leg to get home, so you walked it like a fucking pro. Determined, you speed walked so fast, a soccer mum would gasp.

On your little late journey home, some rattling occurred behind you. You took that as a sign to run. Suddenly a figured jumped in front of, jolting you back. You scuttled backwards, babbling worried apologies and offering your life. Stepped forward was a brightly dressed clown. Harley Quinn.

She leaned forward and smiled her wide, scary smile at you, canines shining. "Hiya, toots!"

You apologised frantically for getting in her way, stumbling to stand up and run. She quickly grabbed your forearm and pulled you back. You screamed for help, but she slapped a hand over your mouth. "Shh! Sh-sh-sh... I'm not gonna hurt ya.. just need a little help is all. Can you do that for me?" she whispered. You nodded quickly, already sweating.

She released you from her tight embrace, backing you against the way. She planted her hand next to your head, leaning towards you. Your heart pumped rapidly and your knees trembled, ready to give way any second.

"I'm hiding from Bats. I don't know if you noticed, but this isn't my usual look! I'm trying something new, and hopefully that bird brain doesn't notice my outfit's changed," she explained.

"Okay, what do you need me for?" your voice tried hard not to stammer.

"Just pretend like we know each other personally. I'm just wearin' a Halloween costume and you find it hot, so we're makin' out in an alley way," she giggled. You gulped. There was no denying she's always been an attractive woman, but she's also like a major criminal? Also, The Joker is DEFINITELY gonna have your throat for this if he ever finds out your identity. It's not like Harley knows who you are, but that didn't stop your paranoia.

"Uh- aren't you with Joker? Wouldn't that be cheating...?" your face shied away.

"Joker? Nahh. Pissed him off not long ago, got him out of my sweet life. That's why I'm startin' fresh, wanna make a new name for myself. Hell, might even gang up with Ives and Kitty."

The longer you looked at her beautiful face, the safer you felt. It was almost insane. You stopped shaking for the most part, but your guard was still high up. Her cheeks puffed up as she smiled, like a cute chipmunk or something. Her perfume smelt lovely too, you just hoped it wouldn't have a negative side effect on you...

A flash of shadow swept overhead and she immediately smashed her lips into yours. The kiss was nice and sweet, lasting almost a minute. It actually felt like heaven. Your hands slowly slipped to hold her waist, and her hand met your cheek endearingly.

Finally you pulled apart, blushing hysterically. You faced down so she couldn't see your red glow. She chuckled. "Sorry, probably should've warned ya first. Are you single by the way? Didn't think to ask, hah!"

"Yeah I'm single, it's fine... uh thank you, I guess... for not like- killing me? I think," you had no clue what to say. What if you accidentally annoyed her? You swallowed hard. She laughed loudly, her iconic laugh possibly bringing her unwanted attention.

"I should be thanking you! Didn't want Batsy to notice a lonely little clown wondering the streets, would've been thrown back inta' Arkham!" just before she skipped off, slid something into your pocket and swatted your rear endearingly. She disappeared into the shadows, and you immediately pulled out the note she gave you.

'Here's my number cutie ;)
##########

Call me later, wanna see you AGAIN!
Harlz xoxo'

Your heart fluttered. There's absolutely no way you were going to go on a date with a supervillain. No way. That's ridiculous and stupid. You'd get yourself kidnapped way too often, and you'd probably be killed. Who knows, this may be a trap and she could be the death of you. You would not be dumb enough to date Harley Quinn, Joker's ex.

At least that's what you told yourself three years ago. After that first date, and the second date, and the fifth date, and the third vacation together with her gal pals, and the home bought together, and the many cats and puppies to fit in with the hyenas, it seemed PRETTY obvious you were dumb enough to date Harley Quinn.

Of course it was hard. She was always being caught and sent back to Arkham, but she always eventually came home to give you that sweet victory kiss. She never hurt you, intentionally at least. But all relationships have bumps along the way. You get along with her friends and her team, and they'd all be willing to save you the second they hear you're in distress.

At the moment, Harley had been in Arkham for two weeks. Just yesterday you received a bouquet of red roses, some of them painted black. They had colour corresponding glitter and little chocolates stuffed between the petals. At this point you don't even question who delivers these gifts from Harley, you're just glad that you're on her mind while she in prison.

You were in the midst of making some nice pasta for dinner when a knock sounded at the front door. You quickly went to check it, but nobody was in sight. You smiled and went back to the kitchen to find Harley at the kitchen window. She had her adorable face pressed against the glass, beaming at you.

"Looks like I won't be having leftovers tomorrow," you laughed as you opened the back door for her. She bounced into your arms, covering your skin in gleeful kisses.

"I've miss you, doll," she hummed, her head resting on your shoulder. A warm embrace encompassed you both, the house finally feeling like home once again.

~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm sorry this is so bad guys 😞🙏