The Boss Is Dead

Chp: 21 A sin

It was later that night after everyone had gone to bed that Sarah sat alone outside the barn, curled up with a warm blanket around her shoulders to block out the chill. She was staring aimlessly into the flames, her mind numb with grief. She was rethinking the same things again and again, over and over: Julia's last words to her. How could one person cause so much hurt?

"This is god's punishment for me... for my sins. This is all my fault..."

"What do you mean by that Julia?" Sarah murmured softly, almost inaudible.

Julia chuckled, a bitter bitter laugh. "I was the second woman...I came between you and Mark. If I hadn't broken you both apart... it might have worked out differently. But no matter what, I ruined your engagement, I ruined you both! This is all my fault!"

"Julia...it's past time you stopped blaming yourself." Sarah sighed, turning away from her. Her voice was barely audible, but Julia heard her just fine.

"You don't know the half of it, Sarah." She sounded tired now, resigned. "It was never Mark's fault. It was mine! This child ...is not made out of love, Sarah."

Sarah felt a sudden chill go down her spine, a foreboding feeling settling in the pit of her stomach. Suddenly, Sarah didn't feel comfortable anymore, her fear taking the better of her, making her legs wobble like jelly. "Julia...what are you saying? I don't understand...." Her voice trailed off as a sense of terror overtook her. As Julia spoke, the words grew louder; her voice became more and more frantic, pleading, desperate.

"Please, please, please, please. You don't understand. Not yet! You remember the Christmas party at the office, don't you?" Sarah was silent, listening.

"I've always loved Mark, you know. Since the day I joined the company, I loved him. I wanted to marry our boss. Oh, how stupid I was. Then one evening after work I saw you and Mark kissing in his office."

A sob broke through her composure, her voice becoming choked and raspy. "You were holding each other and kissing and you...you loved each other. So much, so very much."

Sarah was frozen, horrified. But a dying man tells no lie- well delivering a baby is close to dying. The horrible image was crystal clear in her memory.

"Julia...please stop...stop it...don't ...please..." she pleaded.

"Don't you understand, Sarah? I am the villain here!" Julia cried out, tears streaming down her face.

Sarah's vision blurred. A twig snapped in the distance, jolting Sarah from her musings. An owl hooted softly in reply. She gazed at the starry sky, wondering if angels watched over Julia now. Would God forgive her? Could Sarah and Mark find peace? So many lives hung in the balance over one reckless act. If only Julia had been honest from the start.

"Why, why did he not marry you Sarahhh? Why? WHY?!" Julia sobbed once but kept going.

"It's because I was so jealous. Jealous of how happy you two looked together. I wanted Mark to be with me. I wanted to be his beautiful bride in the wedding photograph that would hung in his office, not you. I'd give anything to have Mark.

So at the Christmas party when I saw Mark giving you the engagement ring—I knew I couldn't let him marry you. I knew I'd have to ruin everything somehow. And so, I planned everything. Every single detail."

Another sob escaped Julia as one more contraction hit. "And that night... luck was in my favor too, I guess. Because Mark had already been drinking. He was drunk and confused, stumbling around the ballroom dancing with you as if nothing else existed. You went early because it was your mom's birthday or something and ...you wanted to surprise her. That left me free to act. I took our boss outside for a cigarette. That cigarette was my only hope. It was a spliff of some kind that I managed to get from Gary. You remember Gary right? He used to take that stuff. It was meant to put Mark to not remember any details... that I could get close to him." Julia continued.