AURELIA || Pride And Grace Series

PRETERITE

Dusty floor, stuffed air, an open sachet of half eaten chips now hugged by mucus on the center table, even the right wing of one of the windows had fallen. I was face to face with the room I shared with two other animals.

I could already see the colour of depression that was going to hit me by the time I would be done.
I dropped my bag on the dusty floor and searched the side pockets for my phone where I had tucked it away from Coleman's sight.
Still squatted in that same position I texted Eve, waited five minutes and no reply, I called her.

"Please, please, I beg you Eve!" I was close to tears immediately she picked up. "I can't do this alone and you know I have fragile fingers, they could break from touching dust. Please come and save me." I begged dragging my words for more drama.

She started laughing and I wiped the one drop of tear that had slipped out of my left eye, I knew she had bought my exaggerated cry for help even when she knew I was only overdoing it.

I called Eve only because she was in school and Matilda wasn't, no serious favouritism between my roommates.
I liked Eve more, let me just throw it out there.

Eve and I were the initial friends, my mother's colleague's daughter. They both worked in an international Nursery school owned by this big scary Lebanese man like six years ago. Eve and I met during the school's end of year event and became close, I'm not even sure if our mothers are still friends but  we've been friends ever since.
Matilda on the other hand is Eve's childhood neighbor, we've all become really close now in university ever since we became roommates, I just am closer to Eve because of the connection we had in the past.

Thirty minutes had passed and I was still squatted by the entrance on the same floor, knees folded for more than half an hour. My legs were numb but I refused to make another move inside our apartment.
The door handle was finally juggled and I heard keys  clanging against each other, I didn't wait for her to finish whatever she thought she was doing, I flung the door open and jumped on her.
At this point I was numb from feet to throat so I just let my body stay on her.

"Hey baby." Only my lips felt alive.

***

Cleaning the room was nothing too serious when you had an extra hand supporting and an extra mouth to gossip with.

"Wait Coleman didn't say anything?" Eve was now wide eyed invested in the story of the clean kidnapper with a black Gucci travel bag.

"He did." I told her, "He wanted me to stay, but I was more worried about what Gucci man was going to say and you know there's no way he wouldn't know it was me, he just saw me!"

Eve was laughing now, hair all over her face and a cleaning rag in her hand, pure maid resemblance.

"Pack your hair up." I told her. Silence followed after as we both faced our share of work.

"Leonora how is Matthew?" the silence became louder when Eve dropped the question.

"Who?" I was genuinely asking. Eve looked at me with doubt while packing her hair up.
"Ohh Matthew."  I feigned remembrance.

Matthew was my boyfriend, first kiss, first relationship and funny how I didn't have sex with him. Coleman was my first and only sexual partner.

"We broke up." I smiled at her.
I wasn't heartbroken at this point, if it were a coupl months back I'd be balling my eye out with that statement but now I was fine and I was more focused on how I wanted to present myself in front of the idiot if I did see him again.

Matthew and I met and became close when I was still fresh into college. I was naive, scared of physical contact even from a guy I loved but still I clung to any amount of attention he showed me because I was in love with him. He did the barest of the most minimum and I would still smile and lay all positivity on that tiny moment of affection because I wanted to believe he loved me too.
He was a senior, a year towards graduating at that time and there I was with my innocent mind believing a boy could give me his full attention just because I had a pretty face. Now that I've lost every form of feeling whatsoever that I had for that man, I keep hating myself for how I let him treat me.
I cringe anytime I remember the last times we spoke.