Butterfly Reign - SilentTeyz

33

Sam departs on a bleary, gray autumn morning. Tommy has come to see him off despite the duke's insisting that he doesn't have to. It's only polite, he thinks, after everything that Sam has done.

His heart speaks of a different story. Of farewells in early winter, parting gazes colder than the flakes of snow fluttering from above. Sam rides into the fog but pauses just as it is about to consume him wholly. For a moment Tommy almost mistakes his dark brown eyes for his father's blue – but then he lifts his hand in a parting gesture, something that the Emperor has never done. Tommy mirrors it hesitantly.

The rest of the morning seems to pass him by. Tommy remembers sitting, reaching to pet Fran and his fingers flexing around nothing. He is neither asleep nor awake, floating in some lazy current where thoughts are an unnecessary burden and his body is as tangible as the mist crawling beneath the manor fences. Once or twice a voice reaches him, a distant echo, tone threaded with worry. Even if Tommy could respond, he would not have chosen to.

Tommy cannot say what makes him strain his hearing. Some sound, soft, quiet, like the touch of a feather upon the surface of a still lake, and constant like the flicker of a light on the distant shore. Something stirs in him like a wild animal waking after a long time asleep. One paw, one loggy motion at a time, it wades through the dead waters.

The sound grows in volume, sometimes rising, sometimes falling back again. Vibrations thrum against his eardrums, almost too loud for him to bear at first, then not loud enough. The longing – he remembers its name, now – picks his chest apart from the inside, ribs displaced and lungs shriveling in an attempt to give it space.

Oh, he thinks, I'm breathing.

It hurts a bit. The air is cold and crispy, a sharp contrast to nothingness that has been there before. He's grateful for the clouds covering the sky. Though the light is unpleasant, it's not as terrible as it could have been if the sun was out in its full radiant glory.

With that realization follows a few more. He is sitting, spine pressed against something that feels like polished wood. Beneath his arm is an arching handle on a bench. His legs have been woven together and pushed so far back that they began cramping. He forces them apart and rolls his feet. The motion is strained, but it's a motion nevertheless.

Tommy tilts his head to look around, his neck feeling far too fragile, like a toothpick sawed in the middle. Likewise to many other buildings in the Imperial family's ownership, the manor sports a large territory beyond housing and service quarters. A garden has been fashioned in the courtyard; decorative trees are spangled with yellow and orange-like bejeweled ballroom gowns. It's daunting how much space there is, after so many days Tommy has spent in the same four corners. He feels much like a hare in a sea of grass, hard-wired instinct whispering that a predator is somewhere there, hiding beneath the surface, waiting, stalling for the right moment to strike.

The song casts a blanket on his fears. He can hear it clearly now, a lullaby-like the whisper of treetops, like barefoot steps upon silky glass and silver bells chiming, pushed around by the summer sea breeze. It halts as Jared's shoulders rise to take a breath. He leans forward, elbows on his thighs, a crease to his forehead that betrays deep thought. The same troubled look Tommy had once obliged himself to banish.

The tune starts up anew. It calls Tommy from the past, and tethers him to the present. Jared still hasn't noticed Tommy looking. Cautiously, like a creeping feline, Tommy puts both palms flat against the bench and drags himself closer. Just an inch, and then he freezes, peering for a reaction.

When Jared fails to notice, Tommy continues his pursuit. Bit by bit, he closes the distance between them, until, at last, there is only a horsehair gap between Jared's arm and Tommy's head. The song flows just beneath his ear. With a pause of last-second hesitation, Tommy lets his head droop against Jared's shoulder.