"No Life 'Til Leather"

Ode to Viceroy

note: couldn't find a megadeth song abt smoking so have mac demarco instead :P (1st thing that came to mind)

Shuffle, shuffle.

Arms, like hungry serpents, explored their new home-crevice. Like an eel to a dim, wet cave, they slithered inside and felt around their surroundings. A bit heavy, true. Tad bit too big, also. Sizeable, very sizeable. Strange to the touch, like a dried up hide of some colossal creature. Truly? Many, many dried up hides of many, many slightly smaller creatures. Not the familiar mix of synthetic and organic fibers, none of that woolen softness. This one felt vile against his fingers - violent, itching to squeeze him dry. It had its positives too, though. Pockets out the wazoo, flaps dragging behind his legs, waterfalls of leather hugging his pants from all sides, shoulders hidden beneath a landslide of dead skin...

Andy put on his new coat. Here and there, it was still drenched in Henri's blood, but it didn't really matter. He gave it a thorough look from above, twirling in place to check every little piece of himself - the front, the back, the bottom, the top - all seemed strangely fine. Fitting, yet foreign. Too large, too small, absolutely perfect, all at the same time. His brain enjoyed the feeling of leather against his fuzzy little sweater, no matter how hard it suffocated his lungs. It was simply perfect.

"... How do I look?" He spun in place, before stretching his arms out in front of W. She sat by, atop the broken down tent of soft silks and linen that once stood on top of the sled - arms and legs crossed, lying comfortably on the bed of pricey materials.

"How do you look? Like a moron, the usual." Without much thought, she threw back.

"No, I mean- I mean, how's the coat? Not too big?"

"Eh...? I guess? You're small as hell, everything looks gigantic on you, anyway. I mean, really, but- but it's not bad. Looks decent." W shrugged a little. "You want a second opinion?"

"Yeah?" Andy waltzed over to the sled and climbed over a few barrels filled to the very brim with fresh, fruits glistening in the moonlight. W lazily rolled over to her back to face wherever he was looking - towards the front, where the sturdy, muscly hands of a red-headed merc were busy shuffling through piles of shiny loot and everyday appliances. "Hedley?"

"Hee-eeedley? Woo-hoo?" W chimed along, waving her hands up high in the air to gather the man's attention. His spiky ears perked barely, just a little twitch, as he cast his gaze towards the two morons sitting atop the loot pile he was so invested in.

"Mmm? What?"

"Does that coat look too big on Lawdog?" W asked, before lowering her arms back down and prepping her cheeks on her hands. Her legs mulled through the air, both swaying gently back and forth - up and down.

"...?" Andy joined in on the question with silence, instead taking a few wobbly steps next to her, and once again raising his arms up and wide open, as if to proudly showcase his newly acquired piece of fashion. Hoderer narrowed his ever so weary eyes, and took a step back to better examine the sight.

"I'm not... quite sure. Turn around?"

Andy did so, with the long, leather tails of his garment following suit. They swooshed through the chilly, night air, as he did a few careful spins.

"... Not really, no. Seems fine to me." He summed up, before casually returning to his looting endeavors, having already gathered a hefty pile of only the most pricey trinkets and pieces he could get his meaty fingers on.