Dreamers (Lesbian Short Stories)

Dreaming

Online relationships never work. Nor do long distance. It doesn't matter if you're still in the same state as each other, if you can't see someone in person, it's impossible to really connect with them. These are the hard and fast rules of relationships. Guidelines meant to keep your heart from shattering into pieces.

A lot of people also say that love at first sight is impossible. That you only fall in love with a person after getting to know them. That anything immediate is pure hormones, superficial lust and desire. Part of me agrees with them. After all, looks aren't everything, and at one glance that's all there is to see, right? A person's appearance?

But maybe, just maybe, sometimes you can see more. You can look at a person and for one second, see their soul.  Maybe you don't know them yet, what they like or dislike, their past or present, but you know who they are, that they are good, that they are what you want and need.

And every moment after that initial knowing just proves that you were right all along, that this is the person you are meant to love.

I want to believe in that kind of love. I nearly do, except what happens when that "love at first sight--proven after phenomenon" is one-sided? How real can your feelings be when they aren't reciprocated?

Or at least, when as far as you know they aren't. And when there are hundreds of miles between you.

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"Thalia, hey," I smile breathlessly at the brunette.

"Hi," she responds, elongating the vowel, pitching her voice up and flashing me a smile of her own. "How's it going?"

"Good, you know, the usual." I laugh nervously, and immediately curse myself for being so painfully awkward.

"Ah, still scamming Jesus for free pizza, then?"

I laugh for real this time, and roll my eyes at her.

"That was one time, and completely legitimate," I protest, remembering the incident. This guy had been giving out free pizza and soda in the parking lot across from my school, but on one condition: that we look into his camera and tell him what Jesus meant to us. It was the easiest thing I've ever done to score a free meal, and I had told Thalia about it as we snapped back and forth as we usually did during the school day, both of us bored in our respective classes.

"Sure you scammer you," she teases, and my cheeks flush red as they always do when she starts up this playful banter between us. If she was really here, I would be giving myself away completely, but the computer screen doesn't reveal my secrets as easily.

It's a blessing and a curse to have the love of your life (who doesn't know she's the love of your life yet) live an hour away, when you're both still in high school and without cars.

"What are you up to, then?" I challenge. Thalia shrugs.

"Work, school, hiding my secret plan for world domination from the government, just girly stuff really."

I snort, and shake my head at her, but really inside my heart feels light and happy. It's these silly moments that make me love her even more.

"Actually, I can't really talk right now, because Rich is coming over soon." She wags her eyebrows at me suggestively. "We're going to Netflix and chill."

My heart stops.

"What?"

"Oh shit, I haven't told you about Rich yet, have I?"

"No, no you have not," I chuckle weakly. My world is crashing down around me.

"Oh man, I must have been distracted. Anyway, he came into Starbucks last week, and since it was really slow we ended up chatting while he drank his coffee. He's really cute, plays the guitar, has a few tattoos. He gave me his number and we've been texting nonstop."