Southern steel- Mack

3. Eden

1 year later
"Cora do we have to do this?" I whine.

"Eden honey you need some bras. Unfortunately for you puberty decided now that you're 12 it would be the perfect time for you to start your period and for the girls to grow. Your momma must have been blessed in that department because you are definitely an early bloomer. Sorry kid but I think you're going to be cursed to start middle school a little curvier than most of the girls. You'll appreciate it later in life maybe."

"I don't think I'll ever appreciate any of this. How come girls get all the bad stuff? Periods and cramps every month, we have to start shaving, and now I have to carry these things around that are going to keep growing and wear uncomfortable bras my whole life."

"Honey men wouldn't be able to handle all the things girls go through. The good Lord gave them one thing to handle in their pants, and most of them can't get a good grip on that. half the time they let it do their thinking. The second it starts doing the thinking they get stupid. Some girls let their va-jay-jays make them stupid too. Don't be that girl. Use that big brain of yours. You're going to start getting more attention with the new assets. Don't let boys fool you with fake promises and pretty words they don't mean. Make them treat you right. The right boy will show you respect no matter what you look like. These gorgeous looks of yours are going to be a blessing and a curse my love." Cora gave me the sex and puberty talk about 6 months ago when my body started changing. She says knowledge is power. We have to be informed to keep ourselves, happy, healthy, and safe. I promised I would come to her with any questions.

"Ugh I wish I was a boy!"

"No you don't. Women are strong and fierce. Sometimes we are underestimated, but that just means when you show what a warrior you are it sneaks up on them and they aren't ready. Girls run the world Eden. Grab it by the balls! Balls are weak and fragile. You grab life by the balls and bring it to its knees honey!"

"I will Cora. I'm going to be strong like you. I still hate bras though."

"Me too girl. Me too! Now let's make Pops' credit card and Victoria secret our bitch. If we have to wear bras and panties they might as well be pretty." She says as she winks at me.

We pulled back up to the club a few hours later. Titan comes walking up and grabs our bags. "You ladies get everything you need?"

"I think we got more than we need." I tell him.

"A girl can never have enough pretty girl. Yes Titan we got everything she needs. It's all taken care of." Cora has become a mother figure to me and Titan.

"Let me give you some money. I've been making some good cash at the garage." Titan says to Cora.

"Boy I will be offended if you don't put that wallet away. You never owe me for anything. That is not how family works. I know you've had a shitty example of that most of your life, but here we take care of each other without expecting anything in return. If I expected anything from you we would have discussed it ahead of time, and I wouldn't have offered."

Titan gives her a hug and tells her thank you again.

"Now we're going to take this stuff in the house. Can you boys fire up the grill and get it going for the party? We'll be over to help out shortly." The club is celebrating the boys graduation. They all finished high school yesterday. I'm so proud of my big brother I can't stand it. I'm usually not allowed to go to club parties, but because this one is special Cora said I could go until it started getting loud and crazy later.

A few hours later and the club is packed full of brothers and women. They have a bonfire going and everyone is having a good time. I find Titan and Ty standing by the fire. I hug Titan and he kisses my head. "I'm so proud of you big brother. You're the best man and brother I could ask for." I know he has worked hard and did his best to take care of me at the same time. From the time he was 13 he took on more responsibility than a teenage boy should have to.

"Thanks sissy! You and I are going places. We're not living in the trailer forever. You're going to go to college and be an amazing woman, and I'm going to make sure it happens."

"I love you Titan. I love you too Ty. Thank you for being my honorary big brother." Ty holds his fist out and I hit it with mine like we've always done. This time though he pulls me in for a hug and kisses my head.

"Love you kid." Ty is quiet. He is big like his dad and doesn't say much.

The music dies down a bit and Prez, Mack's dad, starts to speak. "Tonight is a special night. Ours boys are officially men. We've watched them all turn 18 over the last few months and now they've graduated. Not only are we celebrating their graduation, but tonight 2 of them are getting their prospect cuts." Only 2 of them? I knew Titan said they were joining the club as soon as they could. Who isn't? "Ty and Titan get up here!" Pops steps forward with their leather cuts that say prospect on them and hands them to each of them then hugs them. I find Mack standing to the side of the clubhouse watching.

He catches my eyes watching him and looks away. Mack and I haven't been as close the last year. He stopped hanging at the club as much. I seen him around with girls from time to time. Where Titan and Ty seemed focused on work and the club, Mack seemed to hang out with more girls and friends from school, kind of like the blonde hanging on his arm right now.

They are always the same tall skinny blondes. I guess he knew what he was talking about when he said people are sheep. Maybe it was all hot air when he talked proudly to me about bikers before. I once considered Mack one of my best friends. I didn't have many friends.

Prez continues, "I'm also proud of my boy. He has chosen a different path. He has decided to join the service. He is going to be a US Marine." What?! When did this happen? "Tonight was not only a celebration but a send off. Tomorrow Mack will be headed off to serve his country." There are loud cheers for all the boys.

I am shocked. As Prez wraps it up I don't even hear what else is said. I start making my way towards Mack without thought. Once I'm in front of him I almost feel like I'm going to cry, but I stop myself. Tears never got me anywhere's I learned when I was little they did no good. "You're leaving?"

"Yea it's time kid. Sorry I would have told you but it was sudden, and I've been busy." Kid sounds like a kind endearment when Ty says it. Coming from Mack right now it feels like he just put me down. "Hey tell the guys I'm taking off. Mindy and I have plans before I head out tomorrow. I don't want to interrupt their celebration."

With that he turns his back on me for a girl for the 2nd time. I know he's older than me. I know what I have is a stupid kid crush, but I at least thought we were friends and it hurts that he is so dismissive of me. It brings out all those insecurities of being a bother and having to be unseen and unheard at home. I watch them walk to the parking lot and hear the girl say, "who was that?"

"That's just my friend's little sister." Ouch! There goes my heart cracking.

I watch as she picks the helmet up off the bike, my helmet! "This is too small for me. It's like a kids helmet." I want to rip her hand off.

"Yea it's just a kid's. You can wear mine." Crack there goes some more of my heart. I watch him place his helmet on her head, and she throws my helmet onto the ground without a care in the world. I want to scream. He helps her on the bike and as he goes to get on he pushes his boot to knock my helmet out of his way where she dropped it. CRACK!! There goes the rest of my heart. With that act I know my friendship doesn't mean the same thing to Mack as it did me.

I head back to Cora's and tuck myself in to the guest bed which has pretty much become mine at this point. I'm in no mood to party. It's probably best I call it a night anyway. I'm sure it's going to start getting more wild. As I get older I can start to guess a little more what probably goes on at those parties at night. I'd rather read a good book and call it a day.

I know I'm going to be alright. I've made it this far without friends. I have my family. My chosen family. The club, Cora, Pops, and Ty. Titan will always have my back and love me endlessly. They are all I need. It's time I start focusing on the badass I'm going to become. Men will break you. My dad broke my heart every time I heard his venom or felt the pain from his anger when he hit me. Mack broke my heart when he showed me how little my feelings and friendship meant to him. One day I'll find a strong girl like Cora and myself, and we will become besties. When I find her she's not going to know what hit her.