I remembered her words as if they were only spoken yesterday. They were like shards of glass piercing through my heart. My mother wished me a life of suffering; a life where I would never find my way through the darkness. Why? All because I chose to marry a man who was not blessed in wealth like we were.
My family was rich, I grew up rich, with one cold hearted parent; my mother. I never knew my father. The lucky bastard made a clean break out of my mother's life and in turn, out of mine. I couldn't blame him, my mother was a witch. She disowned me all because I fell in love with a struggling man. She left me to suffer in this small, one bedroom apartment, and yet here I was, in this awfully small apartment, crying my eyes out because she died of a stroke. She was still my mother after all.
Collin, my husband hadn't come home yet because he was angry with me. We had an argument a few days ago. I found out I was pregnant. I didn't want to see this pregnancy through; I wanted to terminate it. Collin got angry; I knew he wanted a baby but we were in a terrible financial situation.
The door opened and I expected him to still be angry and ignore me, but he didn't. He sat on the bed next to me and wrapped me up in his arms.
"I'm fine." I said in a shaky voice. I pulled away, determined to address this issue. "About the pregnancy." I started to say.
"Stop." He put his finger to my lips to shush me.
I do not like being shushed. I leaned forward and nipped his finger. He hissed and pulled away with a curse.
"Angela!" he scolded.
"You were shushing me when I was trying to say something." I grumbled.
I gasped at his next move. "Did you just bite my nose?"
"You bit me first."
We ended up in a fit of laughter, successfully making me forget all about the impending pregnancy at hand.
I decided to keep the baby. In my mind I thought this whole pregnancy thing would go down one of two ways.
One: I would have convinced Collin to let me get an abortion.
Two: Collin would have convinced me into keeping the baby.
What I didn't expect was for my feelings to turn against my sense of logic. Here I was, with my phone in hand, ready to make the appointment, but I couldn't. A surprisingly strange feeling of sadness filled my heart at the thought of loosing my baby. It was as if I was going to loose part of myself . There were certain emotions that I didn't let myself feel.
Every time these new strange emotions emerged, I shoved them down. I pushed them back with a clear path in my mind. Work towards a financially stable life and then think about starting a family. But this time, just this once, I let these emotions out. Tears of happiness filled my eyes. The thought of becoming a mother filled my heart with a warm, pleasurable, tingle, one I had never felt before. I wanted this baby so badly, so much. I sighed and threw the phone on my bed, Collin was right.
YOU ARE READING
The Tide Of Time
Teen FictionMy life was filled with pain and uncertainty since the longest I could remember. I only had myself to rely on, I didn't want it any other way. That is what I told myself, it's what I made myself believe in order to survive. But maybe, it's time to t...