Revelations

Chapter seventeen

AN: *writer at last updates, again* :)

As Ciel approaches the kitchen where he knows with no doubt Bard and Mey-Rin will be, he can't help but feel the nervous tremor in his stomach, feel his small form slightly sway, so that he almost falls down the grand staircase, but catches himself at the last minute and slowly but determinedly continues as if nothing's happened, silently hoping that someone has not noticed him.
'Not yet, anyway', the young boy thinks, finally placing one cold bare foot on the last carpeted step.
'I don't want them to see me...not like this...for they will most definitely think something is wrong...'
When the Earl of Phantomhive's feet at last touch the soft plushness of the floor's carpet, he knows without a doubt, that it's too late to turn back, now.
So, with slow, tentative, and very shaky steps, he walks toward the estate's kitchen, feeling for once in his life what he truly is.
A small, helpless child...
He does not speak as he enters the double doors of the kitchen, but rather stares at all of the pots, pans, and cooking utensils, their shiny finishes glimmering in the morning sunlight.
Even when Bard looks over and says: "Mornin', Earl Phantomhive", Ciel doesn't even glance in his direction, but frantically searches with his one good eye for someone he knows wouldn't be there.
Not anymore, anyway.
"Can I help ya, Earl?", the clumsy cook asks, but the young boy is still staring off at nothing, clearly deep in thought.
In his mind though, the answer forms, clear as the surfaces of the pots in his manor's kitchen.
'I'm looking for Sebastian...'
But of course, that is not what leaves Ciel's now trembling lips as he finally takes a breath and speaks.
"Uh, it is nothing, really. I am just looking for Finnian and Mey-Rin."
Bard turns around, flamethrower in one hand, and stares wide-eyed at Ciel.
"They done goofed again?, he asks, as if he knows exactly just that, and isn't surprised.
It's so startling to the young Earl, who didn't think that his servant-well, one of them, was capable of such a feat.
'Maybe, I've been wrong about Bard', Ciel thinks, finding that he would even ponder such a thing, quite shocking.
Finally though, the boy abandons his thoughts and fills the awkward silence between them.
He shakes his head, a hint of a smile crossing his face.
"No, not to my knowledge, but I need them to report here and you, also. I must talk to you. All of you."
A pause.
Ciel fiddles with his sapphire blue family ring, not daring to risk another glance at the cook.
"Something has happened.", he then says, his thoughts instantly filling with images of Sebastian.
Sebastian, waking him up in the morning...Sebastian, dancing with him at that stupid ball Lizzy had wanted...Sebastian, kissing him till he's breathless...Sebastian, whispering calming words in his ear as he pounds into him, making the boy wonder why such things hadn't happened sooner...
But, now there was a new image...a new thought...
Sebastian, alone in a prison cell without him...
Ciel shuts his one visible eye tight, trying to block out that last image.
The one that is most inevitably a reality for his demon butler.
'I will get you back, Sebastian! I'm not giving up on you...on us...ever!'
And, it is these last thoughts of his that give the young boy the strength and determination he need for what will happen, next.
While he was off thinking about Sebastian, Bard had gone and fetched the others, including Tanaka, even though Ciel hadn't mentioned wanting that particular presence.
Now, they all are standing in front of him, their eyes downcast, staring at the tiled floor, as if they are about to be punished for something they don't even know they did.
The Earl of Phantomhive releases a long, deflated breath of air, and clears his throat, hoping that his speech doesn't sound as shaky to them, as it does to him.
"I've called you all here because, I want to set some matters, right. It is time that you all knew the truth...", he says, voice trailing off, as he watches them react, there's sighs of relief as they realize that they are not in trouble.
Ciel Phantomhive doesn't wait for Mey-Rin's inevitable interruption but rather, continues to speak, while he still has the nerve to.
"As you all probably know now, no doubt thanks to Mey-Rin, here.", he pauses, gesturing at the cherry-haired maid who is now flushing profusely, her face a bright red.
"Sebastian, has been convicted of sexual assault by the High Court of Her Majesty, herself. It seems that apparently due to my cousin's intervention, everyone now seems to believe that my butler, Sebastian Michaelis, took advantage of me, without my consent. Well, I can assure all of you, that such a thing is not true. Indeed, Sebastian and I had such relations together, but it was not against my will. You see, I have not exactly been completely honest with you all, lately. Anyway, just to set the record straight once and for all, yes Sebastian and I are in fact, together and yes, he has been wrongly convicted of such a crime. Now, if you have any such objections or comments on the matter, please do not hesitate to speak up now, so that we may all discuss, openly.", Ciel tells them calmly, cringing inwardly at the shakiness still very much evident in his voice.
He sighs when he sees his maid's hand timidly go up, her face now so red, it appears sunburnt.
"Yes, what is it, Mey-Rin?"
"M-Master C-Ciel, why didn't you tell us, sooner? We would've been understanding. Yes, we would!", she says.
The young boy looks completely dumbstruck at her words, but he tries to remain composed as had speaks.
"You-you would?", he asks, clearly disbelieving the girl's own kind words.
'Bloody hell! Stop stammering you, idiot!', he shouts in his head.
In reply, they all nod and slowly smile at their master.
"We only want what's best for you, and Mister Sebastian is the only one that can seem to even come close to that.", Finny chimes in, excitedly.
Even Bard nods, agreeing with the young gardener.
"Finny-Boy's right. Sebastian has been more than jus' a butler to ya, an' we fully do support whatever makes yer happy, Earl."
It's too much for Ciel to handle.
All of the emotions.
The surprising acceptance.
So much in fact, that he finds himself doing something he's never even dreamed of doing with his servants, but that was before, today.
Before, they'd shown him such kindness and support.
So, now with tears streaming down his face, the young boy extends his arms to: Finny, Bard, Mey-Rin, and Tanaka, and gathers them up into a big hug.
Later, he'll deny ever doing such a petty thing, hugging his servants, but he will also find himself feeling finally relieved, like a physical weight has been lifted off his chest and broken into smithereens.
When he finally pulls back from them, their eyes shining with their own tears, and undeniable happiness, he at last grasps at a question, that he knows now will be answered.
"So, will you all...help me?"
Ciel does not even have to wait a second longer before, they reply, nodding enthusiastically.
If only such things were as great for Sebastian, right now...