My life story

My life story Part 5 - My dad

This chapter is all about my dad. My dad's name is Rahmat Ali. This is my dad's story before he got married to my mum. I will explain how he met my mum and got married to her and what happened when he got married to my mum. 

My dad was born in the countryside of Bangladesh and he lived there with his family. Unlike my mum and her family, my dad's family was different. My dad's family orientation was completely different and opposite from my mum's family orientation. This was why my mum and my dad's relationship also clashed and it was really hard to accept each other's differences in expectations and culture. 

My dad is a very clever man but not always clever in a good way. He is more clever than my mum and in fact he is extremely clever than my mum. 

Sometimes, it was easy for my dad to fool my mum because she was so naive. My dad is still extremely clever. 

My dad also has issues with mood changes which is what leads to his anger issues. My dad can be controlling and abusive towards my mum sometimes, he also has high temper and anger issues. Although he never asked for mental health treatment for his anger issues but my mum wanted to treat my dad's mental health but she never succeeded in finding any help and support to treat my dad's anger issues. When my dad gets angry, he would verbally abuse my mum which would lead to physical abuse. Then his controlling behaviour would start. My mum wanted to get help for him many times but neither her family or the support services in London never provided help to treat my dad's anger issues. 

My dad used to study Electrical Engineering at college or university in Bangladesh and for his study purpose, he stayed at a nearby Hostel with friends like an accommodation for easy travelling. 

My dad one day came to the city of Dhaka in Bangladesh all the way from the hostel that he stayed at which was near his home back in the countryside of Bangladesh. He came to Dhaka city to finish his studies for Electrical Engineering and find better job opportunities as well. 

When my dad finally arrived in Dhaka city, he couldn't find a good place to stay. He struggled to find good hotels or any accommodation. He searched everywhere but could not find anywhere to stay because everything was so new to him. His two friends who's name is Tuhin and Sakir, contacted my mum's dad who is my grandpa had agreed that my dad and his two friends can stay at my Grandpa's house as long as they want until they find job opportunities. 

My dad and his two friends Tuhin and Sakir, decided to stay at my grandpa's house after a mutual agreement with my grandpa. This meant that my dad and his two friends really stayed as long as they wanted in my grandpa's house until they found a job.

During the time of their stay, my dad was studying as usual and trying to find good job opportunities. My dad and his two friends Tuhin and Sakir were also studying Engineering with my dad. 

My dad's two friends knew my mum and her family quite well through her relatives but my dad did not know my mum and her family that well, he only heard about them through his two friends. 

My mum was always so shy and preferred to mind her own business all the time. She didn't really talk to people that much. My mum always liked and preferred being on her own and she did not really care about socialising with everyone a lot. My mum would rather stay in her room all day to study or reading a book or even do some other things but by herself. My mum would often get misunderstood by other people for this kind of behaviour because people thought that maybe she has too much ego or something but honestly there is nothing wrong with being alone. 

My dad and his friends would sometimes talk to my mum but she was never really keen to talk to people that much. However, my dad's friend Sakir would be the only one that my mum would speak to and he was the only person she would get along with.