I am just a burden for everyone
Will it be okay if i ask you to love me?
Would you mind if i fight for you?
What is this feeling? Hatred? Love? Possessiveness?
I miss you so bad..
I want to fucking love you
I want you to know that i am not a bad person
Why do you hate me so much?
What did i do to make you look at me that way?
Why can't you see how much pain I've bared in just for you? I'm shaking..
Why can't you tell that i want you.?
Should i give up? It's too much to handle..
Felix ended up writing about his feelings in his notebook. He was upset, by all the hurtful words and broke down. He cried hard by himself while he held what he had written closer to his chest.
"Minho got the wrong idea of me.." felix spoke to himself as he wiped his tears
"Is this why minho hates me? Then what about hyunjin? What makes hyunjin truly dislike me? There's no way he knows that i wrote those letters...so why...? Does he just hate me because i left without a word...? Or is there something more.." felix spoke to himself stressfully
Suddenly felix's door opened as changbin stood in front of him.
"Changbin isn't too busy these days...and i forgot to lock my door...dammit." felix thought
"Hi felix" Changbin spoke a little nervously
"Hi changbin..." felix spoke
"Jeongin called bangchan today...out of nowhere..said he was visiting..." changbin spoke as he scratched his neck
"What...? Jeongin....really.....?" felix responded in surprise
"You wanna talk to him too? You should go see bangchan.." changbin spoke
"Ofcourse i want to..." felix spoke joyfully as he stood up quickly and left for a moment
Felix felt happy that jeongin contacted bangchan, even when he was in village after a long time. Felix wanted to talk to jeongin badly, as he missed him.
Bangchan got jeongin on the phone again for felix.
"Hello jeongin???? Jeongin... how are you..where are you?" Felix spoke briskly as he felt happy
"Hahah calm down felix..I'm okay...I'm coming to seoul...and I'm glad to hear that you're back...too" jeongin spoke
"I'm happy that you're coming...i missed you..." felix spoke feeling sad suddenly
"Me too...felix...I'll see you soon...i need to get ready right now.." jeongin spoke
"Ok...i can't wait to see you... we will talk again later.." felix spoke as he hung up
"Why is he visiting....why does it feel different? Is jeongin not angry at me for leaving...back then?" Felix thought
Felix walked back into his room as he felt light hearted after talking to jeongin after such a long time.
"Changbin...?" Felix spoke as his heart dropped suddenly
"Why....did you read....it..." felix spoke lowly feeling agitated
Changbin saw what felix had written on his notebook and felix was horrified. He felt scared as changbin looked at felix with an unfamiliar look. Changbin closed the notebook and kept it on the table feeling dissapointed.
"Felix..." changbin spoke calmly as he looked away
"I knew you always liked him..." changbin spoke as the atmosphere got chilly all of a sudden
