Home: A Lippa Story

Chapter 1

A/N: This story is told from Pippa's POV. Italicized portions are flashbacks while normal text is present day. Depending on the length of each section, some chapters may only have one flashback or one scene from present day. Others may have multiple of each. Enjoy!

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I pulled open the heavy glass doors to the Richard Rodgers Theatre in New York City as I made a failed attempt to calm my nerves. "It's just a show, Phillipa. It's just a show." I stepped inside the theatre and was met with a flurry of my castmates rushing this way and that; Jasmine Cephas Jones was frantically getting her costume re-hemmed; Anthony Ramos was helping Thayne Jasperson button up his vest for the opening number; Renee Elise Goldsberry was positioning Carleigh Bettiol's hair into a high ponytail. I smiled a little at the sight, my castmates were so nervous for our Broadway Debut, but then I remembered how nervous I was, and my anxiety returned. Lin Manuel Miranda, the playwright of Hamilton and the actor playing Alexander Hamilton himself, rushed over to me as soon as he saw me enter the theatre. Our friendship had grown over the months of rehearsals, and I was happy to see his calm expression in the midst of the chaos. "Phillipa!!" Lin bounded over to me and engulfed me in a hug. I hugged him back, truly smiling for the first time that day; Lin had that power--he could light up a room with just his personality. Lin eventually pulled away from our hug but placed a quick kiss on my cheek before leaving to finish putting on his Alexander Hamilton costume. I blushed but turned into my dressing room to start getting ready myself.

~

I had my mint green dress on and I was dancing across the stage, grasping onto Lin's hands. Lin spun me around as I sang, "Down for the count and I'm drownin' in 'em." The ensemble chimed in as our dancing slowed down and my shoulders faced Lin's. "In New York, you can be a new man," the ensemble sang as I mentally prepared myself for what was about to happen. "Helpless," I managed to murmur before Lin's lips met mine, and I got lost in the moment. I was the one to break the kiss, before our cue. I was aware of the engagement ring weighing down my left hand as I swiftly walked offstage, wiping the remnants of our kiss off my lips. I felt so guilty for enjoying the kiss with Lin. I was engaged, engaged to someone that loved me back; I couldn't be with Lin. He couldn't be with me; he was married!

I stepped into my dressing room and sank onto the couch. I wasn't crying, I truly did enjoy that kiss, I was just worried about what Steven, my fiance, would say about the situation. I sat on the couch, pondering what to do, when I heard a gentle knock on the door of my dressing room. "Who is it," I called, not wanting to get up and bother with the layers and layers of heavy fabric on my dress. "Pippa, it's Lin," he paused. I could nearly hear the gears turning in his head. "Can I come in?" At those words, I stood up from the couch and slowly turned the doorknob, letting Lin inside my small dressing room. Lin awkwardly sat on the couch on the back wall of my dressing room, and I sat beside him. "Hi," Lin turned his shoulders to face me. "H-hi," I stuttered. I was nervous to be around him, ever since the kiss-that-should've-been-just-for-acting.

"Are you ok?"

"I think so," I fidgeted with the hem of my dress.

Lin placed a hand over mine to calm my nerves, "Why are you so nervous, Phillipa?"

"I-I'm engaged," I said, pulling my hand out of his grip.

"I am aware that you're engaged, Phillipa. But why are you nervous?"

"I can't be kissing you, even if it's just staged. Steven would be so mad if he found out."

Lin frowned, "Steven would be mad?"

"Y-yeah."

"But what about you? Are you mad about having to kiss me onstage?"

"I don't k-know," I had started to silently cry. Lin tried to wrap me in a hug, but I pulled away, "I-I can't be around you. I'm practically c-cheating on Steven."

"You're not cheating on Steven, and I'm not cheating on Vanessa. It's all staged, Phillipa," he tried to hug me again, and, this time, I allowed him to. "It's all staged."

I took a deep breath to stop the flow of tears from my eyes, "L-Lin?"

"Yeah," Lin turned his head so he could look me in the eye.

"I don't think I can love Steven anymore."