Dinner Disasters: Drake and Quinn

Chapter 9 (Quinn): Answers

For the four thousandth time that day, I looked at the ring on my finger. I still couldn't figure out why I'd agreed to wear it when Drake had asked me, other than his takedown of Jessa had softened me for a minute. The man had beautiful taste and the ring looked perfect on my finger, but I knew that wasn't the reason he wanted me to wear it. 

He wanted me to think about what it would be like if that ring was on my finger for real. What it would be like if we were actually married. He wanted me to remember all of the things he'd promised me about what he would be like as a husband.

Drake, when he'd been trying to talk me into marrying him, had woven a vivid picture of what our marriage would be like from his point of view, and I'd loved listening to him talk about setting up our home, things he thought about how our day-to-day lives would be, trips he wanted us to take for our vacations. Then he coaxed me to open up about what I imagined marriage would be like, what I wanted in a husband, in a marriage. What I would be like as a wife, vacations I'd like to take.

Everything we'd talked about had seemed like a dream come true to me. Until I'd woken up and discovered that it was no dream. Without thinking, I picked up my phone and dialed Drake.

"What's the purpose of this?" I demanded.

"You're going to have to narrow it down," his voice said, amused and confused.

"The ring," I explained. 

"Do you like it?"

I liked the way his voice got when he he wanted to know if something he'd given me had pleased me. He reminded me of a little boy in elementary school giving the girl of his choice some little treasure he'd found, hoping it found favor with her.

"It's beautiful." I held out my hand in front of me and twisted it to make the ring catch the light and sparkle.

"Like you."

Normally, before everything about the bet came out, I would have believed that. Now, I wondered if it was a line to placate me, and I hated that. Why couldn't I just believe him? Why did I allow doubts to assail me?

"I used to believe that."

"You should still believe that. Regardless of all of us assholes in the world, you should believe that you are beautiful because you are."

"But if I really was, you would have never met me."

"You know what, Quinn? I like to think I would have somehow, someway met you no matter what because you're the woman I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with. I believe that down to my bones. Maybe we were supposed to meet in that bar. Maybe we would have run into each other in the grocery store. Maybe you would have gotten a kitten, named her Squishy and she would have escaped from your place and climbed a tree, which is when I would have met you when we came to rescue her."

"Squishy?"

"Yeah, you'd have picked an adorable little name for the fluffhead."

That made me smile. I'd buy her a little rhinestone-studded collar, too, so she could be blinged out like my hand was.

"What about the ring, Drake? You said you bought it after only a month."

"I bought that picturing me coming home from a long shift. We'd have an hour together before you had to start work, and I'd just hold you against me, and suddenly I wouldn't be so tired. But I'd be happy to be home because you were there and you made everything worth it."

"I'd have breakfast ready," I said, playing along. "And we'd sit down and eat together, then I'd send you to bed while I went off to work."

"And I'd have dinner ready when you got home, and after we ate I'd spend the rest of the night loving you."

"I can see it. Or I could see it. It's just humiliating knowing how we started, that all your friends think I'm completely unattractive. And I think I'm afraid that, deep down, you do, too."

"I think you're beautiful, Quinn," he said, no hesitation. "You think back to how I was around you from the first night and let that guide you. I called you the second I left the bar, and I left the bar so I could call you immediately." 

As soon as I get out of here, I'm calling you for a date. And he had.

"Think about the timing of that, Quinn. I left the bar -- I didn't go back to my friends to tell them I got your number and you were a sure thing. I left the bar so I could call you and lock you down for a date. I was infatuated from the minute you shook my hand and I looked in your eyes."

He sure had seemed to be.

"I've had women pretend to be into me, Quinn. They didn't care who the person they were dating was as long as he was a fire fighter. It was the job, not me, that caught their attention because they were straight up uniform chasers. And after a date or two, I knew what to look for. I knew they weren't into me. It's hard to keep up a pretense like that for one or two dates, much less months. Did I ever seem like I wasn't into you?"

Looking back as I'd been doing, I couldn't pinpoint one time that Drake had seemed fake with me, bored, not attracted to me. I'd always had his complete attention when we were together, and he always had his hands on me in one way or another.

"I should go," I told him.

"Before you do, I want you to know how much I love you. You, Quinn. I love everything about you, inside and out. There is nothing I would change about you, not one damn thing. I feel lucky you gave me the time of day, and it's why I wanted that date on the books. I needed to be yours as soon as possible, and I wanted you to be mine just as fast."

"Everything in me wants to believe you."

"Well, I want you to believe me, too, and I'm not quinnting until you do and you're wearing that ring for real."

"Quinnting? Really?"

I heard a deep voice call his name.

"I have to go, but, real quick, here's something to make you smile. Got a text from Quest today on my way to the station. He said Jessa brought her car in to him this morning to repair Keres's handiwork, and he told Jessa he wouldn't be able to get her on the schedule for three years because we were really busy."

"That's cold." I started laughing. "But I love that. Keres will really enjoy that, even though she's not too happy with someone named Hux who kept answering the phone when she called there."

"Jessa deserved it," he laughed back. "And Hux isn't a fan of Keres, either, after the shit they got into on the phone yesterday. But they're not what's important. You keep thinking about why I got you that ring."

"I will."

"I messed up in a lot of ways that hurt you. I'm going to make sure you know that I will never hurt you again. I love you, Quinn."

"Bye, Drake," I said.

I looked at my ring four thousand more times before the day ended, but it didn't have any answers for me.