Dinner Disasters: Drake and Quinn

Chapter 11 (Quinn): You'll Know What To Say

Hearing my name and seeing Connor hurrying toward me, I positioned myself close to my open driver's door just in case he was in a nasty mood again.

"That's close enough," I stopped him with my hand.

He gave me a pained look but didn't come any closer.

"What do you want, Connor?"

"I wanted to tell you I'm sorry, Quinn. I'm sorry for saying what I did the other night at the bar. I'm sorry for a lot of things -- drinking so much and being nasty to you. You'd never been anything but nice to me and I lashed out at you."

"How did you know I'd be here?"

"Quinn, I swear I'm not following you. I 'd just finished putting my groceries in the car and saw you when I went to return the cart. Drake wouldn't give me your number so I could apologize, so I'd been hoping I'd happen to see you around." He gave me a tentative smile. "This was the first bit of luck I've had in a while."

"Thank you for apologizing." I made to get back into my car, but Connor kept talking.

"I'm not trying to excuse what I did. But the night I blew things up with you and Drake was a wake up call to me. I always told myself that I didn't have a drinking problem because I followed all the rules we have to follow about alcohol use in our jobs. Never drank for at least eight hours before a shift, never drank on the job."

He jammed his hands in his pockets and looked at the ground.

"Thought my ex was crazy when she kept telling me I had a problem and that I wasn't nice when I'd been drinking. But, like I said, losing my ex and then being such an asshole to you that night made me finally realize my drinking was a problem when I was off duty. After getting on me about it for almost a year, my girlfriend broke up with me because she was tired of the way I drank. Of the way I was a nasty asshole when I was drunk." 

He looked like he wanted to cry.

"And I was hurting that night. I was missing my girl and watching you and Drake all over each other, so damn happy -- and I proved how nasty I got when I was drinking. So I tore your happiness apart and hurt the nicest woman I know."

I just looked at him steadily. "You did. I can't even thank you for telling me because you weren't doing it out of the goodness of your heart. You were trying to hurt me. Us."

"I was. I'm sorry."

"I hope you get some help, Connor."

"I attended my first AA meeting the next day."

"That's good. I hope your recovery goes well."

He nodded. "I'm sorry, Quinn. You didn't deserve what I did to you, and I regret everything I did and said that night."

"Good luck to you," I said after a moment.

He turned away and then spun back to face me. "He loves you, Quinn. He loves you so damn much. All of us could see it, right from the start. Drake was just gone on you. He never wanted to settle down, he was always restless with his ex, and then he met you and everything changed. And it wasn't the bet. It was you."

"It started because of the bet."

"It started because a bunch of us were acting like drunk assholes," he countered. "I never would have met my ex if the drink she sent over to our table had gone to the guy she actually intended it for instead of me. The waitress mixed it up. She never told me that for months, that I wasn't the guy she really wanted that night, but I like to think we were meant to meet."

I smiled faintly. "That's pretty much what Drake said."

"I'm sorry, Quinn. That night...we were all shit. I think that's one of those moments in your life that always stays with you from the shame of it. And maybe that's good so we can remember to have more care with people. To be better. But I am sorry the lesson came at your expense."

I took a deep breath and channeled my grandmother. "Well, it wasn't for nothing, then. I'll see you around, Connor."

"Thanks for listening. You didn't have to, so I appreciate it."

I nodded and he walked back to his car as I looked at the the engagement ring.

I remembered the first time Drake had told me he was going to put a ring on my finger. There'd been a five-alarm fire, and his station had been one of many called in to assist. I'd been around long enough to know that after a deadly fire like that, the fire fighters' loved ones came to the station on their return to greet them, to welcome them back. I'd been following the news updates and knew they were headed back to the station.

Without thinking too much about it, I headed out to meet them, not even wondering if Drake would mind that I was there. I just wanted to see him after he'd faced a fire like that. Two fire fighters had been seriously injured, and it had hit me that it could have been Drake, or any of them, who'd been injured.

The two engines were already back by the time I parked, but I immediately spotted Drake, covered in soot, dirty...but very much safe.

"Drake!" I called, and his face turned to me, his smile bright as he weaved in between the other couples hugging and talking and he grabbed me into his arms. He smelled like smoke, but I didn't care. He was safe.

"Are you OK?" I asked after he kissed me. I wanted to strip him down and make sure he was unharmed.

"I'm good, I'm good," he said, pulling me close again. "Ah, this is what got me through, Quinn. Had a scary as fuck few minutes, and I just imagined getting home to you."

"You have to come home to me."

"I will, Quinn."

"Is it OK that I was worried?" I asked.

"I was, too," he whispered into my ear. "But even under threat of torture, I'll never admit that again."

Wrapping my arms around him, I squeezed. "I won't tell your secrets," I promised.

"I have another secret," he said, staring down into my eyes.

"Oh, tell me."

"I love you, Quinn."

I'd almost let my jaw drop open. We hadn't been dating that long, and I wondered if it was the emotion of the night prompting him to make a declaration like that. But proving that he already could read me, he shook his head.

"I've been wanting to tell you that for a while, Quinn."

"We haven't been dating that long."

"No," he said, "but I knew from our first date. Maybe even from the first time I looked in your eyes."

Lifting my left hand to his chest, he tapped my ring finger. "Someday, not too long from now, I'm going to put a ring on this finger."

That had shut me up, startling me into silence.

"I know you might think it's fast, but I know I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Quinn."

"I don't even know what to say to that."

He'd grinned. "Right now, I don't want you to say anything. But when I ask you for real, I hope you'll know what to say then."

"I might have it figured out by then," I said.

Maybe, just maybe, I did have it figured out.

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