Cam Cameron // Summer Again

7

We decide to do one last game of go karting to end our day so we have to walk to the other side of the boardwalk. On the way there, Taylor "bumps" into me knocking me into Cam who catches me in a dip. I look up at him and remember the lights from the Deb hall and I want to smile but I feel too guilty to. He clears his throat and pulls us upright before walking off. I follow along and lose the hope that I wish Taylor never gave me.

In go karting, the boys take the win, meaning we need a tiebreaker.

"Well since Cam isn't playing maybe he can judge a tiebreaker," Jeremiah suggests. The group murmurs in agreement. "Great! Cam..." he thinks. "Oh pick a number 1-10 and the teams will guess it and whoever is closest wins!"

"How do we know he won't just side with you guys?" Taylor asks.

"Whale watcher's honor," Cam says with a hand on his heart. Taylor asks the nearest worker for a sticky note and a pen and makes Cam write the number down and put it in his pocket.

The girls and Skye huddle together while the boys do the same.

"Okay no problem we got this in the bag," Taylor says with confidence. "Gracie," she says putting everyone's eyes on me. I look around nervously.

"Um, well if it's between 1-10 I would guess 8. It's Cams favorite number. We would always film at home vlogs of us quizzing each other and every one we got wrong would be like... a hit with a pillow or a spoon of hot sauce," I laugh at the memories.

"Okay, we'll guess 8 then," Taylor confirms. We turn around and Jeremiah represents the boys while Taylor and Belly push me up to represent our team. Cam stands between us and goes into announcer mode.

"Jeremiah... what is your guess?" he asks with a game show host voice while holding up an invisible mic to his mouth.

"We guess... 5!" Jeremiah beams crossing his arms.

"And Gracie... what is your guess?" he says with pizzazz.

"We guess 8," I say awkwardly looking at Cam. He looks at me with a telling look. I'm right. I know I am. I'm right and he knows I remember. I mean, how could I forget?

"And the winner... is the boys team!" he says prolonging their victory. I turn around to my team and apologize.

"Sorry guys," I drop my head. My team doesn't sweat it and we all head over to the candy shop to buy for the winning team.

—

Taylor's POV:

I don't buy it. On our way to the candy shop I pull back Cam behind everyone else and let them walk a few more steps until they're out of ear shot. "Lemme see the paper," I demand with my hand out.

"Taylor, C'mon I wouldn't do that," he says but it feels guilty.

"Okay," I cross my arms. "You think I'm afraid of grabbing it myself?"

"Taylor..." I put my arm out one last time. He looks around annoyed and pulls it from his pocket and slaps it into my hand. I unfold it.

"Are you shitting me right now?"

"I'm sorry!" he shrugs.

"Why did you lie? We totally deserved that win!" I prepare to run to the group to reclaim what should be our victory. A hand stops me by grabbing my arm.

"Taylor please," he pleads. I look back.

"Gracie got it right. Why are you doing this?" I squint my eyes trying to understand.

"Because... it hurts. She still knows me better than anyone. It hurts that she can just— stand there and still have my heart while we have to pretend like nothing ever happened!" he breaks. I look at him as he stands small in front of me.

"Okay," I shrug.

"Okay?"

"Yeah, dude, okay... I won't say anything. But, if you don't tell Gracie how you feel, then I will. She deserves to know!" I stand up for her.

"Just... give me until we can like— get the house back or something..."

"Fine."

"Taylor! Cam! Here you are we thought we lost you!" Steven says running back for us. Gracie is right behind.

—

What on Earth did Taylor say to him? Steven and Taylor tease each other some more leaving me and Cam to follow behind them.

"I'm sorry about the internship..." I apologize awkwardly trying to fill our walk.

"Oh— uh thank you. It's alright though... How've you been processing?"

"Um... better. I think. I started therapy so... I have been trying to learn how to use my words," I force a laugh.

"That's good. I'm glad. You uh— you look... like you're doing better..." he trails off.

"Thanks. Belly's right ya know? You look great in that uniform," I flirt without even realizing. I guess being romantic with Cam was so second nature that it just came out.

"Oh uh— thanks..." he looks away. Fuck.

We catch up with everyone else and we buy the bag of candy. Apparently Belly made a bet against Conrad so she has to ride the Tower of Terror. Jeremiah rides it with her. We watch at the bottom as they hold hands and scream. I turn to see Conrad and his jaw is clenched tightly. Taylor looks beyond happy due to her being a diehard Jellyfish stan. I look over and see Cam looking at me sadly but as soon as I catch him he looks away. I look down and hold back my tears. I wanna make this right. I still love him... but I don't deserve him. I don't deserve a second chance. Who's to say he would even give it to me? Jeremiah and Belly get off the ride and we head home.

We enter the house and it's empty. The furniture is gone. The art on the walls. All of it. It's gone. We scatter through the house tearing up to see what was left of Susannah just vanish. I stare at the bay window in the house where I used to write. the poems I wrote that Susannah would hang up are gone. Like they never existed. Like I never existed. I feel my knees grow weak. I turn to see the wall where our portraits hung and all that remains is the dust around the frames that once were. Julia emerges and I see Conrad yelling but all I hear is a ringing in my ears.

Stand still sweetie. I have to capture you the way I see you so you can see what I see. You're radiant darling.