Philophobia - My JoURNaL

Chapter 15# Tired of this

Anyways, I'm kinda sobbing right now, I feel like my past self ruined the 'dream' of being the strong 'touch me and die'- type of girl I always wanted to be. Now I'll only be like that with people I don't... Know yet? And that's kinda AWFUL.

Max and Elodie are sleeping Together tonight, and I don't know how to feel about that.

3:30 am; Max woke up from her sleeping bag and went to the bathroom, I'm still sobbing on the bed and my tears make drawings on the pillow below my head.

It's 11 in the morning rn. What happened? Max noticed I was sobbing and she came to me, laying in the bed with me.

-I'm here. - She said while hugging me.

She didn't even know why I was sobbing, but if she did, I don't know if she'll like it. I don't think she knew me when I was... You know... Cringey and different. I'm and I'll be forever ashamed of that and I wish I could go back in time, but I can't do anything about it now.

-Wait...

Max took Elodie out of the sleeping bag and carried her to the bed.

She looked so cute when she was asleep on Max's arms, I turned around to face the wall and waited.

I turned around again and found Elodie, asleep, with a hand below the pillow and another hand in her mouth.

I took the hand out of her mouth, and she grouned, angry I did that, putting her hand in her mouth again. I did this a couple times until she turned around and I started laughing.

I hugged her. Some minutes after, she turned around again, almost hitting my head with hers.

She looks extremely cute with her sleeping face and grinding when I take her hand out of her mouth.

When we woke up, she looked confused and I started laughing again.

-What the-

Option 1: "Max put you here"
(Continue)

Option 2: "I think you came"
(Chapter --)

-Max put you here.

-No fucking way! - She said blushing. - I'm gonna kill that little shit!

-HAHAHA I don't think so.

-Huh?

-You liked it.

-Well, I-

-YOU DID.

-Okay mayb-

-YES, YOU, DID.

-MAAAAX!!

-Who fainted?! - Max answered.

-HAHAHAHAHA, WHO FAINTED?!! - I laughed. - Oh... Okay... - I mumbled while sitting because I felt dizzy after screaming.

-DON'T LAUGH, I HAD TO ASK!

-Anyway, DID YOU PUT ME IN ELLORA'S BED?!

-No, I didn't-

-YES, YOU DID!

-No, It's not her bed, is MY bed.

-DID YOU PUT ME IN THERE?

-Yeah, why? I wasn't gonna let you sleep on the floor! Why do you care, darling?

-WHAT DO YOU- Oh, uhmm...

-What's the problem, Isn't this a sleepover anyways?

-I mean... - Elodie mumbled.

-Do you have any problem with that? - Max asked.

-I- don't.

One of Max's giant balloons from a party suddenly poked, making a pretty loud noise. They just said it was ugly anyways, while I got hella dizzy just because of the noise.

-Girls... - I mumbled trying to get their attention while I tried to walk, but couldn't, so I had to go back to them and sit again.

-Yeah?

-I- could you-

-OH, NOO-

-I- know, could you- I was about to pass out because of the balloon's noise, and because I woke to fast from the bed and I laughed before, so that caused me to fall unconscious, but Elodie grabbed my head and held me in her arms as I fell. Apparently I moved my head to the right and then slighty to the left a couple times before falling.

And no, I do not have Tourette syndrome, F off, they're just shivers. I move my head when I shiver. It's like a tic.

I started doing it consciously when I got shivers, but I can't help it now. Well, I don't do it on purpose.

-GOD, PLEASE STOP FAINTING ON MY ARMS!!

-No... - I mumbled.

-YOU'RE AWAKE?!

-No?... - I continued

-You're lying!

-No...

I WAS unconscious, just not at all, I mean... Hahahah like, I was, but not fully unconscious. Like when you fall asleep and then you wake up and you're like half-awake?

Anyways...

I woke up again to her looking deeply at me like she was dying to kiss me. Like GURLL, I wish I had that face so you could kiss me with mine- I mean... Okay just kidding. It felt weird.

We played some PlayStation and went to eat something for breakfast.

After that, my phone started ringing; my aunt was in the hospital and I probably needed to head back home to take care of my dog.

My girls saw my worried face and paused the Playstation to come at me.

-What happened? - Max asked.

-You can tell us everything you need us to know.

-My- aunt is in the hospital. I probably need to take care of my dog. I- have to go.

-Is someone at your house?

-Well, no, you could- stay there if you want to...

-I won't stay at your house unless you want me to. - Elodie said.

-How come wouldn't I want you in my house?!

-Just say you want me there.

-Aren't you being a little weird? - Max asked.

-I WANT YOU THERE

-Okay, so let's go!