Late night thoughts

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(Just look at that blush when Ashlyn smiled at him😭They're the cutest)

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Something drew him in when they'd first met. He liked solving things, any hesitation hesitation she seemed like the perfect puzzle to put together. But never did he think it'd come to this.

As Aiden was laying sprawled on his bed, he thought back to his first interactions with Ashlyn. He recalled the day of the field trip.
Having succeeded in managing to get Ashlyn to come on the trip, he felt really proud of himself. She was so intriguing to him. Every time he'd smile at her, even when using his biggest grin, she'd look at him blankly or sometimes even scowl in response.
Whenever he tried getting close to her, she'd jump away from him like a cat. Throughout their entire hangout with the group, he'd walk close to her or constantly try to get her attention, but she just wouldn't budge. Right then, he made it his goal to make her more comfortable, to get her to share more about herself, maybe get her to smile at him.

The first thing he noticed about her was later that night when they came across their first phantom. In the spur of the moment, without a second thought, she took the lead and came up with a plan right on the spot to get them out of the situation. Instead of panicking, she figured out a way to fix the situation, and that really surprised him.
If anyone were to ask him who the smartest person in the group was, without a second thought, he'd say her. She had the ability to lead and the intelligence to come up with effective plans, which, in his opinion, was pretty impressive.

He couldn't figure out why he had wanted to protect her. He'd tell himself it was for the adrenaline, just for the fun of it. But the more things that happened, the more eager he was to shield her from anything dangerous that happened. He'd often subconsciously stand close to her so that if anything were to happen, he'd be able to get her out of the way.

Then he found himself wanting to be around her even more. It was even more confusing. Up until now, no one could really pick up his interest that much. But now he found himself wanting to be in her particular presence, find out more and more about her.

As some time passed, a new thought creeped into his mind. She was like a painting. He found himself unable to pry his eyes away from her. He often realized he had spaced out and simply sat there, watching her. Her expressions, the way she talked or moved. He found her weirdly hypnotizing. In different parts of the day, his mind would wander back and repeat images of her as if to torture him.

Why did her hair fall this way when she undid her braids, like a river of soft waves? Why did her eyes shine like that? You could often see the determination in them. Why did she make such calculated movements, like every move she made had been carefully planned. It's so flawless. Why would more and more questions pop up into his mind?

Then he remembered one of the things he wished he could go back and change. Because of his recklessness, he had caused her to get dragged up on the roof and get hurt. Why did she have to pay for his stupid decisions? At that moment, he had felt so helpless. Afterwards, he'd had countless nightmares leading back to that night. He didn't want her to get hurt ever again. If he could take away any pain from her, he would do it over and over again without any hesitation. When he had hugged her, he'd felt himself growing unable to let her go. He wanted to hold her in his arms forever, just keep her away from anything bad.

At that point, he'd figured he had some sympathies towards her, but maybe it'd go away. It's just simple nothing. Maybe it was normal to feel this way for his friends. And then came the day they went to the arcade. When she'd looked at him with that smile, her usual seriousness and stress, now replaced with the gentle burrow of her eyebrows and the chuckle she had let out that knocked his breath out.
He felt like somebody had jump-started his heart. He almost thought he had imagined the interaction. Well, that one image wouldn't be leaving his mind anytime soon. Now he knew it wasn't just a simple nothing.

But now a new question came up in his mind: How did she feel? He could see a change in her since their first meeting. She had opened up to him more, she didn't avoid him like before. Sure, he followed her around like a puppy usually but he could maybe recall times when she'd also choose to stay near him. He wasn't sure if it was his imagination or if she really did, though.

He remembered that time when he had comforted her at the hospital. She blamed herself for what happened to Tylor even though no one else would. When she'd held onto his hand, she'd looked as if she were on the edge of falling apart. He'd never seen her like this. Her usually collected and strong exterior had crumpled completely. He wished he could convince her that none of it was her fault.

But now his mind was buzzing with  questions about the whole situation. He knew she's not really keen on showing her feelings in front of people, so he wondered if she trusted him? A tiny part of him hoped she'd chosen him specifically to confide to. But maybe it didn't mean anything, and she probably just needed someone in the moment, and he was there.

Then why did she seem so scared of losing him after he had died in the phantom dimension? Why did her hands shake when she embraced him the same way his did when he'd thought he'd almost lost her. She'd held him tightly like he might disappear any second. Was she genuinely scared of losing him? Of course, he knew she cared about everyone in the group, but he'd never seen a reaction like that from her before. Or maybe it didn't mean anything again.

Being brought back in reality, he slapped himself on the forehead and groaned, annoyed at himself. Why did his mind have to torture him like that? He wasn't used to feelings like that. He thought he was for sure going crazy now. He didn't understand himself, couldn't understand how she felt for him, he didn't understand anything. He knew she was the prettiest girl he'd ever laid eyes upon, and he knew he'd probably do anything for her. She was so smart, caring, and no doubt the bravest person he knew as well. She wouldn't admit it, but he could see the pressure she took upon herself, how much it pained her. How much she pushed herself to protect them and find a way out of this mess. He honestly didn’t think he could do what she does, and that made her all the more amazing in his eyes. She was his idea of perfection.

But what was he supposed to do with that information? How was he supposed to proceed from here? And if he said anything to her, would she distance herself from him and all the progress between them would be lost.

What if she never spoke to him again? He couldn't bear the thought. He knew he wouldn't be able to live with himself if that were to happen. Maybe for now, he shouldn't say anything. Did they even have a chance to be together with everything going on? But then again, what if they never manage to put a stop to the phantom dimension visits?

His head was spinning from thinking. Glancing at the clock, he realized he should probably go to bed if he wanted to get some sleep before midnight. He tried to calm his racing mind, and a bit later, he drifted off, dreaming of a certain green eyed ginger.

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Author's note:

Soo this is the first one-shot. I hope you enjoyed it :)

The main idea that I had for this one is that I wanted to really analyze the development of Aiden's feelings for Ashlyn throughout the story. It's so clear he's in love, so I kind of wanted to explore his thoughts and views, and when exactly he started falling in love. It was a really cute one-shot to write.
Also I'd be happy to take requests if anyone has any.

All characters belong to Red.

Byeeee👋

Word count: 1367

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