A Court of Trickery and Salvation

Chapter Twenty One

"What?" I step out of Rhys' embrace, staring up into those sparkling violet eyes. Excitement and apprehension shine with those stars as he takes a step back to give me space. "I-I just became Fae, how can we possibly be mates?"

"I felt it before you became Fae, it just snapped into place when you did." He explains as he carefully reaches for me but I simply stare at his hand, completely overwhelmed with everything. The stars in his eyes start to dim and my heart aches that I'm the one doing this to him.

"Rhys.. please." I don't know what I'm begging him for but Rhys seems to understand what I need more than I do. He simply nods before exiting the room and as soon as the door clicks shut it feels immensely empty, just like that damned cell. For a second I debate on calling him back but I need to be alone to at least attempt to work out these emotions. I've been so focused on surviving in that hellhole that I've been shoving everything except anger down, save for that explosive episode. Casteel's declaration of loving me weighs heavily on my mind as well, another thing to work out. So much shit to work out completely on my own, I can't exactly waltz back into the human lands and ask my sisters what to do nor can I go to the Spring Court to ask Feyre, Casteel used to be my biggest supporter besides Jaye but now they're both stuff I need to work through.

"You know Rhys only wants to help." Mor's voice cuts through the silence in the room, startling me enough to jump. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. I just want to check on you, Rhys left pretty quickly and you don't seem exactly put together." Her comment brings heat to my face, from either anger or embarrassment I'm not entirely sure.

"I don't need advice from you and I sure as hell don't need you judging me." I snap at her, that burning anger rising up inside me again. It seems like the only safe emotion, it kept me alive for so many years dealing with Crighton.

"I'm not judging you Kayla. I want to help, Rhys is my cousin and I owe him so much." She says softly as she holds her hand out in an invitation but that boiling anger prevents me from seeing reason.

"I don't want your help!" I snap at her, feeling something strange flare up inside me at the overwhelming emotion. Mor stares at me, her brown eyes wide with shock as she back away from me.

"Kayla..." She breathes, her voice small and timid as if she is afraid of me for some reason. "I know accepting help from a stranger is hard.."

"You don't know shit about me! What I've been through!" Memories start flooding me, soon the searing anger turns into a crushing sorrow as tears sting my eyes. Everything with Crighton, Jaye, the sting of Casteel's betrayal followed by his declaration of loving me.

"Kayla!" In a flash her arms are around me, holding me tight against her as she lets me sob against her. I struggle against her, knowing she'll go straight to Rhys about this but I need my space from him. "Calm down Kayla, I won't tell him if you don't want me to." She soothes in my ear, pausing my intense struggling. "You don't have to fight alone anymore Kayla. We have you." Something inside me breaks at her words and I cling to her tightly, sobbing into her shoulder as everything hits me again. Mor holds me tightly against her, rubbing my back and whispering soft words of encouragement.

"You can't tell Rhysand. He doesn't need to deal with putting me back together while he's healing too." I tell her after I finally manage to calm down enough to string together a coherent sentence. Mor squeezes me a little tighter and I feel her nod against my shoulder, I don't know why she would keep secrets from her cousin but I'm glad she will keep mine.

"Rhys wants to help you Kayla, he won't judge you." Mor pulls away and squeezes my hands as she gives me a sad look. "But I understand not wanting to burden him as long as you remember you are not a burden." She looks me over with a small smile on her lips as she leads me towards another room. "Let's start by getting you washed up." Confused, I follow her willingly until we reach a beautiful bathroom decorated in the same colors as my bedroom. The bathtub is huge, it could probably fit two people comfortably, and it has an assortment of shampoos and body washes.

"This... this is too much." I turn to Mor who just smiles at me before walking in behind me, clicking the door shut softly.

"You better get used to things like this. Your mate is a High Lord and your best friend is a Prince, you won't go without for as long as you live and that's forever now." She chuckles at me as she waves her hand and the bath instantly fills with water, the steam rolling into the room letting me know it's hot. The mention of Casteel only increases the building pressure behind my eyes as a huge migraine forms.

"Please don't remind me. There's so many thing to untangle that I don't even know where to start." I groan, digging my fingers into my temples to attempt to alleviate some of the pain caused by those two.

"I'm here if you need help." Mor says sweetly, rubbing my shoulders in the most soothing gesture I've felt in a while from a woman.

"You wouldn't happen to know what went on between Rhys and Casteel would you?" I smile innocently at her and she just chuckles before patting my arm.

"I'm sorry Kayla but that's for them to tell you. Get cleaned up and relax for a while before joining us for dinner. There's some people you need to meet." The look she sends me makes me want to drown myself in the bathtub.

"Hey Mor?" I call after her and she hums a response while looking back over her shoulder at me. "Thank you." She smiles broadly at me before nodding and leaving me alone with my thoughts again.