BANE OF HIS EXISTENCE

Chapter 3: PERVERT VS SNOTTY

**Andrew**

"Good morning, guys! I heard last night’s race didn’t go your way again. I’m curious, how much do you think you could have gained this time? Maybe one or two million naira? Let’s talk about strategies for next time! I think I might be able to help you"

An overly cheerful voice sliced through the morning air, and I turned to see its owner casually plopping down in the seat opposite Hossein. With her back turned to me, she stole a piece of bacon from my breakfast plate, a mischievous smirk dancing on her lips, exuding the kind of playful malice that only a she-devil could embody. My stomach churned as I pushed my plate away, the food suddenly unappetizing. I shot her a fiery glare, clearly warning her to back the hell off!

How on earth did she uncover what happened at last night's race?

"It was three million," Min interjected, responding to her question. I shot him a furious glare, my frustration boiling over.

"What the hell, man? I know you're trying to impress her, but it’s bros before hoes, alright?" My words dripped with disbelief and irritation as he shrunk back, looking like a kicked puppy caught off guard.

Meanwhile, the source of my annoyance dared to chuckle at our exchange. Hossein, ever the gentleman, broke the tension by asking a question, adding to the atmosphere of absurdity that surrounded us.

“How are you doing today, Maya?”

The moment the words left his lips, her playful smirk dissolved, replaced by an unexpected sweetness. A bright smile spread across her face, illuminating the dim light of the room, as she leaned closer, her enthusiasm bubbling over as she launched into a lively discussion about a book he had been reading at breakfast.

Seriously, who reads a book during breakfast?

It’s unmistakably Hossein! That's who!

Just one glance at Min and I could read him like a book; his thoughts mirrored my disbelief.

What’s going on with these two?

Hossein has always been a bit of a mystery to us, rarely allowing a genuine smile to cross his lips. He usually cracks jokes only when it’s just the three of us, and his words come alive mainly when Min and I are deep in some ridiculous antics that inevitably warrant a scolding from him—about 90% of the time if I had to guess. But ever since he met Maya, everything seems to have changed. There’s a perpetual, goofy grin that's taken up residence on his handsome face, radiating warmth and joy in a way we’ve never seen before.

And Maya? She’s always laughing, her eyes sparkling with delight at something he’s said as if he’s suddenly become the most amusing person in the world. It’s a delightful transformation, and it leaves us wondering just what kind of magic she’s worked on him.

Dude is not even that funny!

And I’m not jealous, alright?

I promise!

I just can’t stand Maya.

Yeah, that’s definitely it.

I was only six years old when I first met her. She was just five at the time, her tiny frame snug in a pink jacket adorned with a bunny hoodie. I still vividly remember her beaming at me with a smile so adorable that it made my young heart skip a beat. At that moment, feeling a mix of admiration and irritation, I blurted out the first thing that popped into my head.