𝙇𝙊𝙑𝙀 𝙂𝙊𝙀𝙎-ˡᵘᵏᵉ ᵃˡᵛᵉᶻ

fourteen

THE OFFICE WAS QUIETER THAN  the next morning. Sadie sat at her desk, staring blankly at her computer screen. She hadn’t slept much, her mind racing with everything Luke had said the night before. The painkillers were still in her bag, just inches away, but for the first time in weeks, she hesitated before reaching for them.

Even after hesitating, she still took the bottle from her bag.

Sadie's thoughts drifted to Hotch. He had been sent on a special case alone, which Sadie thought was strange—something like that never happened.

After what Sadie and Hotch went through with Mr. Scratch, they had built a connection that helped her get through it.

"You okay?" Aaron asked, noticing Sadie staring out from the plane window on their way back home.

The case had messed with both of their minds—Mr. Scratch had messed with their minds.

"I'm fine," Sadie lied, but Aaron caught it immediately.

"He made me watch as each one of you died," Aaron opened up, making Sadie look at him with a shocked expression. "And I couldn't stop him," Aaron said, his voice breaking.

"It wasn't real..." Sadie started.

"I try to tell myself that, but it looked and felt so real," she whispered.

"I saw it too... everyone was dead on the floor... and I heard my mother..." she whispered the last part. "She was yelling at me, saying it was my fault."

Sadie paused, her voice trembling. "And then suddenly, I felt like a little girl again, as she beat me until I couldn't feel my body anymore."

She came clean, admitting something she had never told anyone about her abusive mother before.

Aaron frowned as he watched Sadie flinch while talking about her mother. His heart ached because he knew that pain too well. His own father had beaten him when he was younger, and he knew exactly how she felt.

When Sadie looked up into his eyes, she could see it—he had been there too.

He gave her a reassuring nod.

"What happened in our pasts is what made us who we are today. You're out here saving people, Sadie. You're making a difference," Aaron said, offering the words she really needed to hear.

"Thank you, Hotch," she smiled, wiping away her tears.

The past few days had been a blur. Everything moved too fast, and Sadie kept losing focus.

Everyone noticed, but nobody dared to say anything.

Sadie turned and looked at Spencer. Her tired eyes lingered on him as she slumped in the chair next to Emily, who was half asleep.

“Oh, I didn’t hear you come in,” Emily said softly, her voice groggy.

“It looked like you were sleeping,” Spencer replied, placing an evidence bag on the table.

“Thank you.”

Emily sat up straighter, glancing at him. “I heard about your mom. Spencer, I’m so sorry.”

Sadie frowned, her gaze shifting between Emily and Spencer. What? She was so out of it that she didn’t even know what had happened to Spencer’s mother.

“It’s okay,” Spencer said, his tone even. “Luckily, there’s a clinical trial at Johns Hopkins. It’s happening at just the right time.”

His words blurred together for Sadie, who squeezed her eyes shut against the pounding in her head.

“I’m headed to the crime scene, all right? He’s all yours, Prentiss,” Luke said as he walked into the room.

“We’re thinking now that Todd killed Cormac,” Emily replied.

“The timeline works out,” Spencer said.

Sadie sat silently, trying to process the conversation around her, but her thoughts felt distant, detached.

“Brother against brother. That’s tough,” Luke remarked.

“Well, according to the Bible, fratricide was the first murder ever committed,” Spencer said, his tone clinical.

“That’s interesting,” Luke replied before shifting focus. “Anyway, he’s as clear-headed as he’s been. I’d jump on it.”

“Okay. Sadie, go with Luke,” Emily instructed.

The group’s attention turned to Sadie. Her head was in her hands, eyes shut against the noise in her mind.

“Are you okay?” Luke asked gently.

Sadie stood abruptly. “I wish you’d stop asking me that,” she snapped, brushing past him toward the door.

Luke followed close behind. “I’ll stop when I see you’re doing fine. You’re not okay.”

“Just let it be!” Sadie’s voice cracked with anger.

The drive was no better. The blur persisted, and Sadie could feel herself slipping further away.

Penelope sent the unsub’s address to Luke’s phone mid-drive.

“Sadie.”

“Mhm?”

“I need your head in the right space,” Luke said firmly.

“My head is—”

“No, it’s not,” Luke cut her off.

“Will you shut up?” she snapped.

“Just don’t black out, okay? Don’t let your head go somewhere else. I need you focused.”

“Fine,” she muttered.

When they arrived, Sadie stepped out of the car, her head pounding harder than before.

Luke opened the door first, his gun raised. Sadie followed, her movements sluggish.

“FBI! Drop the weapon now!” Luke commanded.

They moved closer.

“You know what they say about a cornered animal,” the unsub said, his voice low and tense.

The two agents kept their weapons trained on him.

“He gives up,” the man continued before throwing the knife to the ground.

Sadie hadn’t even noticed he was holding a knife.

Her chest tightened with a mix of panic and frustration. She lowered her gun, watching as Luke secured the arrest.

The realization hit her like a cold wave—she wasn’t okay. Not even close.

Sadie stood outside the door, her hand hovering just inches from the wood. She hesitated, her chest tightening with every second that passed. She hated this. Hated feeling weak.

But she needed help. She didn’t know where else to go.

The thought weighed heavy on her: I’m a burden.

Her hand trembled as she finally knocked, the sound echoing louder than it should have in the still night.

The door opened almost immediately.

“I need help,” Sadie said, her voice breaking as the words tumbled out. Her hands shook at her sides, and her gaze darted everywhere but at him. She couldn’t focus, couldn’t steady herself.

Luke stood there, his brow furrowing the moment he saw her. She looked like she was barely holding it together.

Luke didn’t hesitate. “Come in,” he said softly, stepping aside.

A/n:

Hi...

I'm back.. well, kind of. I recently started school again. And it has been so busy. I also had a lot going on in my personal life.

I also watched the show 9-1-1 finally! Would you guys like an Evan buckley fanfic?