Eclipse

Chapter 24

★Aruna★

I feel like an asshole. All he asked to do was hang out. I keep thinking back to his face when I rejected him. The way his face fell, his lips curling into a wobbly smile that didn't yet reach his eyes. He opened his mouth to say something, but before he did, he was rushing out of the shop. I watched as he left, his head facing his feet the whole time, his hands in his pockets. I felt horrible.

I went ahead and bought another book and headed home. It was only when I was laying on my bed, my blanket draped over my knees that I realized which book I chose. I throat clenched, reminding me of the way Elio looked at me.

I look down at the book. It's very well-known. The book is called, Clipped Thorns. I open the cover of the book, an old drawing on the first page. On the paper is a sketch of a rose, the thorns clipped. Beneath the rose, there's a note underneath, and I read it.

This book is for anyone who has fallen in love with the wrong person. For anyone who loves someone so deeply just for everything about your world to forbid you from being happy.

I swallow thickly, remembering Elio once more. I wanted to say yes, I really did. I was about to. I hadn't felt that excited in a long time, but it was short-lived as I remembered who I am. What I am.

I close the book and set it on the table next to me, closing my eyes. I press the heels of my hand to them, trying to stop myself from feeling so horrible, even though it doesn't work.

I drop my hands, staring at my wall straight ahead. I imagined in my head what it would be like if I had actually said yes. I imagine Elio walking with me across the town. I imagine him planting a kiss to my covered cheek. I imagine him accepting me for who I am. I imagine him meeting Rya like Massimo had, and I imagine them loving each other like family. And I imagine what it could have been if only the universe allowed it.

★★★

I took a nap before getting dressed into my homemade outfit. I stare at myself in the mirror as I brush my hair, watching the long strands fall against my covered breasts with each stroke of the brush. My lips part slightly, taking in a breath.

I remember, when I was younger, my mom would sit me in her lap and brush my hair. She told me that my hair was dangerous but beautiful. That things can be scary, but sometimes it's worth it. It's because of her that I want to show off my beauty.

"You look wonderful." My eyes flick to Rya's reflection, her body leaning against my door frame. A small smile laid on her lips.

I glanced down and smiled. "Thank you." I laid my brush down, not getting up from my seat.

Rya walks up to me, a soft look on her face. For a while, she's been the tough older sister that I'd needed her to be. She'd been there when I needed her the most. She believes in tough love. She knows that she's all I have and would sacrifice her happiness a million times for me.

She stands behind me, grabbing the hairbrush from the vanity. She moves my hair from in front of my shoulders to my back, brushing it lightly.

"I remember Dad," she says. I'm not surprised when she says it. I've always known that she remembered him. He left when I was two, when she was five. And Rya has always been the type to remember when she was little.

I waited to see if, for once, she would continue, and she did. In a way that she never has before. "I can't remember his face, but he had long, black hair. He wore it down in front of Mom." She paused, and I don't fail to catch this look in her eye as she says the next part. The sparkle. "I still remember how he looked when he would kiss Mom. I was convinced that they would forever be in love."