Ahoy

Chapter 1: Intro

Skipping to the beat, swaying my hips, softly humming the sweet melodies inside my head and I swiftly deliver my handcrafted Krabby Patties to the many starved customers. They look up slightly and grin when I come by with their orders. The joy emitted by these fellow fish is enough to keep me going on even the toughest day at work. Granted, after they all leave and it is time to close, I am instantly in hell. Don't get me wrong, I love to clean. Seeing the grime wipe away to reveal underneath a brand new looking grill. Or maybe effortlessly spraying off each dish from saucy and cluttered to shiny and pearl white. But while the open sign is still up, so are my spirits.

It's not easy being the #1 and only fry cook in all of Bikini Bottom. Long hours, strict scheduling, shitty coworkers, shitty management, overworking, perfectionism, Karens. It never ceases to amaze me how long I've really been working at the Krusty Krabb when I remember this. But they need me. The morsels of goodness that I sculpt from nothing always impress and satisfy hungry fish. I can't just stop. I don't want to either. Knowing that I make such an impact on the community makes everything worthwhile.

Eventually I made my way back into the kitchen where I found three more order tickets on the line in front of me. I pick up the still warm spatula from beside my grill as Squidward turns around to look at me through the small window.

"Hurry up Spongebob! We have more orders coming in and you haven't even started on those!" He said while furling his brow at me.

In the time it took him to say those words, a line of about four started in front of the boat. He quickly turned back around and began greeting the customers. I took this as my que to get busy. I gathered up more patties, throwing about eight on the grill. The meat began screaming for mercy while I turned up the heat and sprinkled a little seasoning on top. I glanced back up to see two more chits on my line. When I turned back down I damn near blacked out as I got into autopilot. Tossing, twirling, flipping, squirting, assembling. It all happened so fast and without a thought going into it other than love, the day was over before I could say King Neptune!

One look outside and the view of the moonlight shining so beautifully along a path of coral and flowers meant it was time to get the hell out of there. I carried out my closing duties as quickly as possible before Mr. Krabbs had come out of his office for the first time all day to jingle his key ring and exclaim, "Alright me boys, it's snoozing time."

I did a look over once more to be sure everything would be in order for the next time I would come in because the next day was special. It was Mr. Krabbs' mom's birthday. She wanted to take him with her on a day-long trip over to New Kelp City to see the sights. After a bit of debating, Krabbs decided to let us not open the next day due to the history of bad things happening when we opened. While I wasn't the most on board with not opening, I did eventually accept the needed time off.

Squidward and I always walked next to each other on the way home. I know he hates me, but he has always done that. I never really knew why, but he almost insists on it. I think it's like a feeling of protection or something. But I get it, it is really creepy outside at night. All the oogly booglies are out and you can't see them before it's too late. Also the sound of his tentacles beside me was always comforting. The quiet popping always let me know he was still beside me, ready to fight off anyone who dared cross us.

Tonight, we didn't make much small talk. We chatted briefly about some plans for the next day but nothing too crazy. We both seemed to be wanting to just do what we always did. He was going to do some painting and practice his clarinet, and I was going to watch some TV with Gary and maybe go out for a walk. Blow some bubbles, blow off some steam. Though, when we got closer to our houses, the conversation shifted. He started asking me about my love life and if I had found anyone yet. I responded with a typical no and he just kind of huffed at that. I asked him what that was about but he didn't say anything. Instead he just stared forward for a while. I could tell something was going on inside his head that he just wasn't saying. Then he drew in a deep breath and looked down at me right outside our houses.

"Bobby, do you want to come inside and keep talking? I recently bought a new bottle of bourbon, maybe we could share a couple glasses?" He said with a smooth tone of voice. His face showed only good intent yet I was still hesitant. He hated me, why would he be asking me to come in for drinks if not to do something to me.

"Thanks, but I think I'll pass for tonight. Gary always expects me home by a certain time and WOO if I don't make it, boy is the guy an ass."

"Oh, that's okay. I hope you have a good night Spongebob."

"Thanks, you too." I responded with a smile and then entered my home sweet pineapple and retired for the night.