michigan cherry // billy the kid (2022)

seven

Walking on eggshells around Billy has been a minor yet effective form of torture. You stopped singing for him, and he stopped asking. He still attended your shows, but you can't help but believe it's out of obligation.

It's endlessly confusing. When you first met he had most definitely been hitting on you, unless you were misreading that. You're rethinking every decision you've ever made because he won't talk to you anymore. Well, he does, of course, but it's small talk, mostly. It feels like you constructed a brick wall between you even though it was his fault for reading your stupid notebook in the first place. Every time you thought about it, you spiraled back to anger again.

It doesn't help that you're staring at his back as you lead your horses into a new town, wordlessly having cycled back East this week considering your savings were starting to get close to what you needed. Soon, or maybe even on the way to Michigan, you'd be able to make enough to get your family back.

You force yourself to look away from the way his body sways on the horse, your jaw tightening as you take in your surroundings in a new city. Without discussing it, the two of you cycle a fair distance around the schoolhouse on the edge of town, the old fence falling and tipping over in several places from years of children climbing all over it.

There are children playing outside currently, and you smile despite your foul mood. You missed your family. Those kids, Josie and Harvey and Sarah, and you remember talking about sending them to school once you and Max could finally afford a more permanent place for the five of you to stay. But that day never came.

Billy is lost in his own thoughts, mostly swallowed by the tension in the air that had enveloped you both for over a week now. He just doesn't know what to say, what to do, he wants to apologize but he doesn't want to risk what comes next. As long as you're here, as long as you're still with him, he's willing to suffer the silence.

Silence that's broken when he hears you gasp and shuffle, and as soon as you stumble down from your horse, he's got his gun out ready to stop anyone who's startled you. But you don't seem scared.

You're clambering off the ground from where you fell in your haste to dismount, and sprinting toward the fence of the schoolhouse with your guitar case discarded like it was nothing on the ground behind you.

"Harvey! Harvey!" You call out the boys name as you run to the boy you swore was for all intents and purposes, your little brother, and when he turns his head, you're even more sure it's him.

He hops the fence to meet you and you're crashing into each other, falling on your knees as you catch him.

He smells different, cleaner, and he's dressed in clothes you had never seen, but it's him- and you bury your face in his hair as he clings to you. The last time you held him like this was the night Max was killed.

You don't realize you're crying until you lift your head again, gently grabbing the boy's chin to raise it and get a good look at him. "Oh, honey, what are you doing here? I've been looking for you guys, I never stopped looking, I'm coming to get all of you." You say, brushing your thumb over his round cheeks.

He doesn't answer, and you don't think he can. You just smile, pulling him close again and pressing a kiss to his forehead. "I missed you, I missed you so much." You mutter into his skin, rubbing his back and holding him close to you. You'd never let him go.

Looking around at the rest of the kids watching the scene from the other side of the fence, you don't see Josie anywhere.

You hesitate for a moment before asking. "Where's Josie?"

Harvey shakes his head against you. "I don't know." He answers quietly, and your heart breaks more.

You were thrilled to see him, to see he was okay, but realization comes crashing over you and chills your bones in an instant.