"The Complexity of Desire: Loving Two"

Birthday Plan

My birthday is approaching, and for once, the usual excitement eludes me. Traditionally, I revel in a week-long celebration, savoring every moment of the anticipation and joy. Yet, this year, I find myself strangely subdued, indifferent to the idea of marking another year's passage. The thought of another year slipping away stirs a profound sadness within me.

I recall the eagerness of my youth, how I yearned for the day I would turn eighteen, believing it would unlock a world of freedom and transformation. I envisioned that milestone as a beacon, a threshold that would alter everything and grant me the liberation I craved.

But as the years have flowed by, one after another, that promised transformation has faded into a disquieting emptiness. At twenty-eight, I am no longer the wide-eyed dreamer of my adolescence. Time seems to accelerate, its passage more relentless, and I am left to grapple with a deepening sense of melancholy and nostalgia. Each year feels like a fleeting moment, a whisper of time slipping through my fingers, leaving me to confront the reality of growing older and the void that accompanies it.
A voice murmurs from the background, drawing me from my reverie and anchoring me back to reality. "Earth to Meg," it gently chides, "where have your thoughts drifted off to?"

"I'm lost in thoughts about my birthday," I confess, a hint of melancholy in my voice. "This year, I just don't feel like celebrating."

"That's nonsense," comes the quick retort, filled with resolve. "Of course we're celebrating! In fact, I've already secured reservations at the new club opening downtown. So, no excuses or justifications."

"But honestly, I'm just not in the mood. Please, don't make me do this."

"Listen," comes the firm but kind reply, "I promise, it will just be us. But we've got to at least wait until midnight—it's our tradition.

It was our cherished tradition, a ritual that bound us together year after year. As the evening wore on, we would gather, hearts brimming with anticipation, waiting for the clock to strike midnight. When the hands finally aligned at twelve, signaling the dawn of a new year in your life, we would offer our heartfelt birthday wishes, enveloped in the warmth of shared memories and the promise of another year.