Day of pani- unity!! / Darius angst one-shots

Panic and cuddles.

Sooooooo, I want Darius angst. That is it, there is a lot ourt there, but I want, no need more!!

Here we go!

Ps: everything is PLATONIC. In adition, I did (try to) write a panic attack, it has been a while since I've tried to write one, though I have dealth with my own, sooooo. In other news, I am using gender neautral pronouns for EberWolf.

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With the day of unity fast approaching, in other words they has a few nights left, Darius was getting restless. He, among the rest of the catt's, knew that sleep was vital would they want to stop the emperor, however he couldn't get some shut eye even if he wanted to. Unrest eating away at him.After freeing Luz, since when did he call her Luz and not human?, and the Owl Lady, he had explained their plan to the two of them, Lilith, understandably, tried to offer her own solution, but was shut down. 

Darius sighted, helping Raine lead a rebellion while also being a covenhead trying to not act in any way suspicious, was tiring. He, sitting at a table, doing who knows what, was staring at the Human and the Owl Lady, carving a palisman. He remembered all the times Belos would destroy them for Tigtan knows what reason. He himself didn't want to remember his own being taken from him. It felt wrong, not having his palisman with him. Eventhough it was years ago, at his initiation to be exact, it still left him feeling empty trying to remember how it felt with their companion around.

He sighted again, his usually stoic face, dropping into his hands as he closed his eyes. Picking himself up again, a few more nights untill the day of unity. The catt's didn't even have plan for after, did things seem so hopeless?? He stood up, grabbed a cloak and went out to the balcony. Pulling the cloak over his face, trying to make sure he wasn't seen. It was dark out, looking up at the stars he felt the stress of the past few days creeping up on him. Leaning on the railing, on his arms on the railing to be precise, he was getting lost in his thoughts.Are you sure the plan will work?

Not for sure, there are to many variables to take into account. The other covenheads for example, they believe they'll be granted paradise...And the kids, the be more exact, Hunter?He'd heard from Luz and the Owl Lady that he got out the the mind of the Emperor, he also heard about the commotion at Hexide before going out and investigating with EberWolf. Hunter was save.For now.The voice said. And Darius knew the voice was correct. Not only was Belos still out there, looking for Hunter, if the draining spell wouldn't be stopped the kid would also die. Darius pushing down the thoughts, though he felt a stress induced anxiety attack coming up. Great, because I need that right now. 

He sighted, again. Sighing usually helps, but he hadn't realized that he needed to do so, so very often. Rubbing his wrist, something he'd do if he needed comfort, he looked down at the lights below. So small, he thought to himself. Just like all of us. What are we thinking? Rebelling against the Emperor? Like that would work. They where all going to die and there was nothing to do about it. Nothing he could do about. He was going to lose yet again and he hadn't done nearly enough to even try and put up a fight.

His thoughts started spiraling even more. 

He was a useless nobody, someone that shouldn't be standing where he was. He shouldn't be trying to put up such a useless front. He should not, could not, dare to make an effort. Standing up for what is right? That is something Darius never did. Why should it be different now? Why should he do anything good now? Why today, tomorrow and lastly on the of unity, why did he think he could make a difference?

He hadn't realized it, but he started breathing heavily. He had slumped down to the ground, back against a wall, grabbing himself by his shoulders, trying to ground himself. It wasn't working, if only he had taken matters into his own hands earlier, not waited untill he had captures Raine. 

Speaking off, Raine has noticed Darius had gone out to the balcony a few minutes ago, but, while looking over, they didn't see him. Raine, looking back over the past few days, no weeks, realized that they had seen Darius busy. And only busy, always doing something.

They decided to the on Darius.Walking out onto the balcony, cloak hiding their features as well as possible, they saw the abomination covenhead sat on the floor, breathing heavily, eyes staring into nothingness and, whilst trying to comfort himself, Raine realized that Darius had torn the fabric on the cloak. His gloves and cape where still intact, how? Raine, having dealth with panic attacks of themselves and others before, slowly sat down infront of Darius. Carefully in doing so, they grabbed Darius' hands in theirs. Darius didn't seem to notice, or rather if they did, didn't give a reaction to the touch. 

Raine started whispering. Saying things like: "Hey Darius. Hey, hi. Darius. Breath. Can you hear me?", at some point Darius managed to look up at Raine, still breathing heavily, rapidly now to. Raine gave a soft smile. "There we go", they said, still holding onto Darius' hands they continued. "Try and match my breathing okay?", they asked. Darius, through his own thoughts heard Raine say something to him before they took an, exaggerated, deep breath in, and out, and in and out again. 

Darius tried, he really tried, to match Raine's breathing. He couldn't, even by focusing on Raine's hands touching his, he couldn't manage to get put of his own head. Raine, smart as ever, realized this. Raine thought about something before looking away from Darius' paniced eyes and they called out for someone. Darius, in the mean time closed his eyes, trying to ground himself. He felt Raine's grip losen, but before he tighted his own grip on their hands, they had already let go.

See? Even Raine doesn't want to help you, you out of all people, one of the strongest witches alive, you should be better than this, but you aren't. You are worthless, couldn't even protect your palisman. Useless, selfish man that you are. Raine hadn't realized it yet, but silent tears had started falling down Darius' face. They hadn't realized that them holding onto Darius' hands was the only left to ground him. Instead they had gone inside and looked for EberWolf. 

Eber was looking around, sniffing the ground and seemingly being worried. "Eber?", Raine said, as they approached the covenhead. "Looking for something?", they asked.Eber nodded before continuing to look around. "If it is Darius-", Raine was cut of by Eber growling. They where startled but managed to collect their thoughts and continued, whispering: "He's outside, he's having a panic attack and I can't seem to help him so I thought that, maybe, you could help?"

Ebers ears pearked up, looking over at the balcony before thanking Raine and hurrying off.

Finding Darius on the balcony Eber saw that he was shaking. They saw that Darius was hugging himself, his breathing heavy and rapid. Raine wasn't kidding, he was defenitly having a panic attack. Eber, slowely aproached Darius, Raine had followed them. The both of them made eye contact, never having seen Darius that fragile. Raine slowely sat down infront of Darius again and grabbed his hands, rubbing their thumb over Darius' palmes. Eber walked up to Darius, who was already calmer than before due to Raine's exaggerated breathing and their hands grounding Darius. 

Eber started to sluggle upto Darius calming him more. As the three of them sat there, Darius started to calm down, Eber was sleeping and Raine was standing guard as Darius was clearing his head. 

"Are you alright Darius?", Raine asked in a whisper, making sure to nate wake Eber or startle Darius. Darius hummed before confirming that he could be better. Raine nodded in agreement, they could be better aswell. They sat down next to Darius, the both of them feeling tired and not sure what to say so they sat in silence watching the night sky turn into a morning sunrise.

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Phewwwwwwww, I hope you like(d) this one-shot!! I sure did writing it (eventhough I had to start over about 1090 words in because of some saving issues)! I hope I gave everyone the correct pronouns, I think I did, though my brain has been staring at the fic for to long and am staring blindly at the black void- 

Hope you like it!!