one sided crush to one sided love, all at once
(Really short and my random thoughts but publishing this is part of self growth so bear with it please🥲🙏)
"Shreya, coming to the function?" I asked the pretty girl, who looked my way and smiled, "Why," she smirked, "Don't want me to?"
"Never said that." I retorted back, noting down her name as one of the people who will be coming to the last annual function of our school life, the class 12th Farewell Party.
And I was bittersweet, knowing I would be, one way or the other lose contact with my friends, lose some and meet some new. I deeply despised the fact that the life which once brought all of us closer, would be separating us all. It felt like cheating or some sort of a crime. I wanted to be with my friends, and hopefully, some more time with Shreya, the girl I had liked for so long.
She rested her head on my shoulder. Though this would have my heart racing, to everyone else and my closest friends and best friends, it was two close friends being clingy. Even I was, with my other friends.
"Sad?" She asked and I answered, "Not really. I'm not going to lose contact. Not with the friends I love."
"...Does your list have me in it?"
"Fuck no."
And I laughed when she hit me hard on my head, landing punches on my arms, laughing, "You bitch!" And others joined in, knowing it was our usual shenanigans. But to me, it were my last precious moments with Shreya. The prettiest, funniest and the best girl I knew. Happy, sensitive to the smallest things and yet cursing like an old drunk man. She was the smartest and dumbest person I knew. With a big attitude and even bigger sass. Gleaming brighter than stars and laughing louder than anyone else, to the point where her laugh was inaudible and everyone had been slapped. Shreya was someone I loved.
"Does my saree look good?" "Haan, haan. It looks perfectly fine."
The definitely not awaited day had arrived and I was in the restaurant bathroom, fixing Shreya's saree. Because after all the formal events, the private party and great food, group photos it was time for a little rest time for our huge gang.
"Fix my necklace na yaar." Shreya pulled on my hand, and my stupid heart jumped. "You're so annoying, I swear." I turned her around and looked at her back, the deep cut of her blouse would definitely kill me today because the bpm on my smartwatch had been suspiciously high ever since I had been here with her. I touched the clasp, as delicately as possible, as I blew away the hairs that fell on my fingertips. I looked at her through the mirror. Pretty, pretty lady, so beautiful she'll kill me.
"Done, let's go now," I hadn't even finished when she hugged me and I melted, so perfectly in her arms. "I'll miss you," she whispered. "Me too."
"Can I talk to you for a moment in private?" She asked.
"We are in a private space though."
"Not here yaar!" And she grabbed my wrist and ran and I followed, and I wish she'd do this everyday. We ran until we were on the balcony of the restaurant where there wasn't a single person with Shreya who held my hand. I looked at the sunset, the blazing red colour, that perhaps matched the blush on my cheeks. The sudden February heat was crazy. Then she laid her head on my shoulder again, "I love you." She said. A statement. I repeated accordingly as a friend, "Me too--
"I don't love you as a friend. I love you as a lover would." She had said in one breath. And I was wrong that the sunset-red matched my cheeks, because it clearly did with hers. Red cheeks and teary eyes, the perfect heartbreak combination. And I pulled her closer to me faster than the speed of light, her feather light lips on mine, the hunger in my heart calming and my mind turning mush.
-ThatThugRus
23.36 PM
22 August 2024.
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