DARLING (yanderes x reader)

XXIV- bad reputation

Tobias didn't know how long he'd have to fight against himself, against the darkest part of himself, the very same one he'd been trying to escape from by pushing it away deep in his heart.

The more time he spent away from (Y/n) without news from her, the louder the thoughts got and the harder it became to deny the very tempting idea of erupting back into her life and see for himself whether she was safe or not. Still, he knew he shouldn't, if anything the trial he was facing was the very proof that he should stay away for both their sakes.

Nothing good would come out of him giving into his Infection's urges. Nothing.

So why was he still contemplating ways in which he could have yet another glimpse of her smiles? Be close to her and hear her voice?

She needs you.

She doesn't.

She's vulnerable without you, an easy prey.

No, she's an independent grown up woman.

Day in, day out, those two parts of him fought in his head, arguing about whether or not (Y/n) was capable of keeping herself safe, or whether or not Tobias had a role to play in protecting her from others and herself.

And so far, Tobias had been able, although barely, of reasoning with the twisted part of himself that tried to convince him to crawl back to her. But the thing was, Tobias was running out of breath, was growing tired of resisting a part of him that only seemed to grow with each passing moment away from (Y/n).

He didn't know for how much longer he'd be able to remain himself, and the moment his Infection won, he feared the repercussions it would have on both his life and (Y/n)'s. The very last thing he wanted was to shatter the freedom and equilibrium she had slowly built for herself after years of feeling trapped in her own family.

Maybe I should just steal her away from everyone and everything.

Tobias jolted up from his bed at the thought that had just invaded his mind, fear rippling through him. This was the first time such an idea hit him. And he'd never been this scared of his own mind before in his entire life.

Images of him and (Y/n) played in his head. Just the two of them sheltered from the world in their own little house, away from the city and from the Uninfected Community. Away from any threat to her wellbeing and safety, away from all she ever loved and wanted.

A scenario that, to his Infected mind, was a daydream, but to himself was an utter nightmare. Not because he didn't want to be with (Y/n); hell, Gods knew he ached for nothing more than her loving him back; but because such a scenario could only occur if he failed at preserving the both of them from the twisted part of him that aimed at destroying the both of them.

A low groan fell from his lips as he brought his hands to his ears. As if this could keep his Infection from pestering him, as if this could save him from the inevitable. As if this could save him from himself.

"Tobby?" Marcus's voice sliced through the roaring of his own mind, followed by a knock on his bedroom door. "Are you okay, my boy? You've been cooped up in your room all day."

This earned another groan from Tobias. He really wasn't in a mood to put on a mask right now, and he feared that if he tried Marcus would see right through him anyways. That's just how well the older man could read through him.

Tobias cleared his throat, trying to compose himself. He hoped that if Marcus didn't see his face it wouldn't be as easy for him to see through his bullshit.

"I'm fine, sorry for worrying you." He said, "I'm just feeling sick and don't want to pass on whatever I caught to you."

Silent seconds pounded in Tobias's ears as he waited for Marcus's reaction to his half lie. Technically he had been feeling sick, just not in the way most people would think.