Violet

20. Neither Mother Nor Father.

Anyway, Matthew had every intention of saying goodbye to me. He knew and agreed that, at least for today, we would have to part ways. And maybe that's why, taking advantage of the moment, he disappeared from the scene as soon as Toby got thoroughly distracted by me. Honestly, Toby was completely focused on me. He even turned his back on Matthew, showing complete indifference. The heated expression he'd had before cooled off.

The vampire didn't yet know that I had already arranged for my trip home tomorrow morning. I hadn't told him, when would I have had the chance? But there was no need to anyway, because Toby had likely already stolen every thought from my mind along with everything else. Not a single memory escaped him.

In this regard, Toby was probably lucky with me. After all, I never had a lot of thoughts. Whatever happens — that's what I think about. No more, no less—I don't dwell on things, and I rarely revisit the past. So Toby didn't have to dig deep to understand what worried me most and what intentions I was likely to follow.

"Do you want to go to my store tomorrow?" he cautiously suggested, seemingly pretending not to know my true plans for the next day. "You and me. You can take a look. You've never seen it before."

He was indeed being cautious. Out of everything he could have said to me right now, he chose the safest option. In any other case, he wouldn't have been able to predict my reaction. He was likely certain that pressing me under the current circumstances wasn't a good idea. How could it be otherwise? Treating me any differently would have been too harsh. For instance, if he bluntly reminded me, without any sugar-coating or alternatives, that everything had already been decided and communicated to me. And that it was, more or less, inevitable.

I could sense, from his patient posture and slow speech, that Toby was only trying to create a moment to grab me more securely. And when we got back to his place, the vampire had likely already envisioned that the only thing left for me to do was to go to bed immediately. That was all I needed to do—sleep. He was concerned about this, without showing his worry, to avoid causing me unnecessary panic.

So, it turned out that Toby was choosing to act as if my intentions were unknown to him. Our inevitable conflict on this matter (since the vampire never agreed to let me leave him) wasn't preferable for him, as it could harm the quality of my sleep later on. In the near future, which was waiting for me just a few minutes away.

"No," I shook my head. "I don't want to."

Back when I had asked (begged) him, I genuinely wanted to go. Toby remembered my few requests to him accurately, but now—I had changed my mind. Trying to win my consent to stay at his house for another night like this was way too easy. It was a simple trick on his part, obvious even to me.

"Then where do you want to go?" he asked next, interrupting my thoughts, still as calm as ever. He quickly added, "Besides back to your home, of course."

Now, hinting that he was indeed aware of my true desires, Toby seemed ready to convince me of something else for as long as it took. The realization that, although he could threaten me, he lacked the will to do so, quickly inspired me to ask the vampire for something completely impossible or at least challenging to accomplish.

"America," I said sharply.

I wanted to add a specific city or state, but I hesitated and couldn't think of any. Maybe New York? But what if that's an independent country, not a state...?

"Tomorrow?" Toby clarified without malice, unable to suppress a smile at my ridiculous request.

I nodded confidently:

"Yes. Tomorrow, right away," I made a pause, unable to come up with any other way to make this task harder for him. "Early in the morning."

Why this particular request came to mind, I wasn't entirely sure. Maybe this country just seemed so far away to me. Almost entirely unreachable and therefore not even existing. Unfathomable even for a vampire.