✿⋆·˚❀˚·⋆✿ The Thread that bind Us ✿⋆·˚❀˚·⋆✿

Silent Longing

Noah's pov : 

I hunched over my desk, a fortress of books and papers surrounding me like a protective wall. The world outside my small bubble was a whirlpool of color and noise, but I focused intently on the pages in front of me. Each word swirled together, creating a haze that both soothed and isolated me. I could hear the distant laughter and chatter of my classmates, but one voice pierced through the chaos, a melodic laughter that made my heart clench — Risa Anders.
She floated through the classroom like a sunbeam, her long black hair cascading over her shoulders, catching the light in glimmers of midnight. Her brown eyes sparkled as she tossed her head back in laughter, drawing the attention of everyone around her. My fingers tightened around my book. I hadn't been able to shake the image of her standing in front of the class, her declaration of love ringing in my ears like a haunting melody.
"I love you, Noah White. Will you make me your wife?"

I swallowed hard, forcing my gaze back down, trying to drown out the memory. I had said no, and I was determined to stick by that decision. Love was a distraction, a frivolous notion I had never believed in.
Risa hadn't spoken to me since that day. She hadn't even looked at me. It was as if she had vanished into a world where I didn't exist. The vibrant energy she brought to the classroom was now muted, and I felt the emptiness in her absence.
"Hey, Noah!" A voice broke through my thoughts, and I glanced up to see Ralph, leaning against the desk with a grin. "You've got to check this out. Risa's been posting some wild stuff on her Instagram lately." 
I forced a smile, but my heart wasn't in it. "Not interested," I muttered.
"Come on! You can't ignore her forever. It's Risa, man!" Ralph persisted. "I mean, you turned her down in front of the whole class. That's legendary! But now—"
"Legendary?" I interrupted, the word tasting bitter on my tongue. "I just said no. It's not a big deal."
"Oh, but it is!" Ralph laughed, shaking his head. 
I pushed the chair back, standing up abruptly. "I need to go." I grabbed my bag and headed for the door, but Ralph called after me. "Where are you going? You can't just run away!"
I paused, glancing back at Ralph. "I'll be fine," I muttered. 

I stepped into the bustling hallway, feeling the warmth of sunlight through the windows but also the chill of Risa's absence. As I walked, I could hear snippets of conversation that made my stomach twist.
"Did you hear? Risa's not even talking to Noah anymore. She's totally over him."
"Good riddance," another voice chimed in. "He's such a weirdo."
My jaw tightened. I quickened my pace, my heart racing with a mix of embarrassment and anger. I didn't care what they thought. I didn't care about any of it.
The library beckoned me, a sanctuary of quiet and solitude. I stepped inside, the familiar scent of old books wrapping around me like a comforting blanket. I settled into my usual corner, surrounded by towering shelves, and opened my book, but my mind was elsewhere. Risa's laughter echoed in my thoughts, her bright smile haunting me. "Ugh," I muttered, slamming the book shut. "Get a grip, Noah."
The door creaked open, and I glanced up. It was a couple of classmates, and they were chatting animatedly. "Did you see her with Jason? They looked so cute together!"
"Yeah, and I heard they're going to prom together. Risa really moved on, huh?"   
Prom. The word sent a wave of panic through me. Risa was popular, and there were countless boys lining up to take her to that dance. I had made my choice. I didn't believe in love, and I certainly didn't believe in high school romances. 

As the days passed, I found himself watching her from afar, unable to tear my gaze away. Each time I caught a glimpse of her laughing with friends, or flipping her hair over her shoulder, it felt like a knife twisting in my chest. Risa was radiant, and I had turned her down. 

"Hey, Noah!" A voice jolted me out of my spiral of thoughts. It was Amber, one of the quieter girls in class.  "Are you okay? You've been really distant lately."
"Just busy studying," I replied, forcing a smile.
Amber's brow furrowed. "You know, you can talk to me if you want. I heard what happened with Risa. I think you should really just—"
"Don't," I interrupted sharply, feeling a heat rise to my cheeks. "I don't want to talk about it."
 Amber nodded, her expression turning sympathetic. "Okay... just know that I'm here if you need anything." As she walked away, I felt a wave of guilt wash over me. I didn't mean to snap at her, but the situation was spiraling out of my control. I just wanted to forget. Forget Risa's smile, forget the way my heart raced when she was nearby, and forget the way my stomach dropped when I saw her with someone else. But forgetting was proving to be impossible.

The following weeks dragged on, each day blending into the next, and still, Risa kept her distance. It was as if I had become a ghost in her world. I watched helplessly as she threw herself into her social life, surrounded by friends, laughter, and the occasional boy who dared to catch her eye. 

 One afternoon, as I sat in the cafeteria, a loud burst of laughter caught my attention. I looked up to see Risa sitting at the center of a table, her head thrown back, her laughter ringing like chimes in the wind. She was animated, vibrant, and utterly captivating. "Why did I say no?" I whispered to myself, my heart heavy with regret.
"Still pining for her, huh?" Ralph slid into the seat across from me, smirking. I shot him a glare. "I'm not pining for anyone."
"Sure, buddy," Ralph chuckled, glancing over at Risa. "You can't fool me. I see the way you look at her."
"No, you don't," I snapped.
"Right. Because the way you're practically melting into your chair is totally normal," Ralph teased. "You need to talk to her, man. This 'ignoring each other' thing is just awkward."
I sighed, rubbing the bridge of my nose. "What's there to talk about? I said no. It's over."
"Is it?" Ralph leaned in, lowering his voice. "You think she's just going to forget about you? Risa may be popular, but she's got feelings. Maybe she's just waiting for you to make a move."
I shot him a skeptical look.  My heart raced at the idea. I pushed my tray away and stood up abruptly. I walked out of the cafeteria. I took a deep breath, my mind whirling with conflicting thoughts. What if  Ralph was right? What if I was missing out on something incredible because I was too afraid to face my feelings? But then the doubt crept in. What if I tried to reach out to Risa, only to be met with rejection again?  I ran a hand through my hair, my mind racing as I paced in front of  locker. I needed to talk to her. I had to. But how?