Eternal Ember

Chapter 13: Woeful Wens . . . Oh!? Wait, There's A Note . . .

  When I wake up in the morning the world seems to be against me, the late autumn sun streams into my room and the heat of it is nice. I wanted to wake up expecting to feel the same way that I have been feeling and act the same way that I have been acting. I frown at my window and a tear slides down my cheek, touching my ear before it hits my pillow. I'm not in the mood for happy things, I enjoy not being able to feel anything else but sadness because it stops me from worrying and I don't want to worry, they wouldn't want me to worry. I go downstairs like I normally do, my hair unbrushed and with tear-puffed eyes. I have to go to Eliza's house and I have to have Jordan drive me I'm introducing Zach and Zoey to their new BFF's for while I'm gone in a few days. I saunter down the steps expecting to see Mother in the same spot on the couch that she has been in the past two days when I come downstairs in the morning but this morning Mother jumps at me and tries to hand me an envelope somewhat forcefully.

"Your brother wrote you a letter." She says through tears of what I assume to be joy. I take the letter from her hand and hold on to it as it is my very lifeline.

"Should I o—"

"Yes! Yes, you should." Mother interrupts.

I wear a sad yet hopeful grin as I walk into the living room and sit down on the couch. Mother comes and sits by me. I open the envelope and take out the note. I have to unfold the letter multiple times since my brother folded it three times. Each time I unfold it I do so with so much gentleness and care as if the paper will crumble and disappear in my hands if I move too quickly. It's a silly thing to think but I have not seen my brother for five days counting today and the whole time he has been gone I have been worried like crazy. I open the letter and read it aloud to Mother:

Dearest Sister,

I really don't know how to start this note. So I'm going to say the most obvious thing. I love you so much little sis and I can't wait till I can hug you again or till I can tell you how silly you used to look when you used to wake up in the morning and come downstairs when you had forgotten to brush your hair. You mean a whole lot to me Emmy. All that said if it is not to much I would love for you to let Mother and River know that I miss them deeply as well.

Now you are probably wondering how Asher and I are doing. The answer to that question is tired. I know or at least I hope that you laughed at that. But before I say anything else I just want to say that I know that by the time you get this, it will be Wednesday and I know that means you will be leaving in a few days to put action into your plan. Now please don't be mad at him for telling me what you plan to do. I made him tell me plus I would've found out eventually.

I also want you to know that while the part of me that sees you as my fragile baby sister urges me to convince you not to do this, the better part of me - the part that sees you for who you truly are - says that I fully support you. And that part is bigger.

Okay, so how are we doing? You likely want to know that. If I'm right let me know that I was when I get back since I'm sorry to say that you are not allowed to write to me.

Well . . . as I write this note Asher is racing the chief commander around the track. The reason for this is because despite my best effort to keep him silent Asher said he could beat any man here when it comes to speed. I just hope that he doesn't screw up and lose. Oh, and I forgot to mention, they have to do three laps around the track by the way. And I know that is not a problem for him. I mean I've seen your friend race and I know he's fast, lighting fast if I may say that.

I, on the other hand, am writing to you with a bandage wrapped around my arm just below my elbow and two inches down because I got sliced with a dagger in drills the other day. But I am totally fine, just a little sore that's all. So don't worry. I also have been acing every drill and am on the way to upping my rank, and if I get that I can be sure Asher and I stay as safe as possible. I know that the whole rank thing sounds odd since I have only been here 2 days but we do nothing but train, eat, train, and then do war strategy and of course, we get some sleep.

These next lines are written to you as I watch Asher finish his race, which of course he has won. And o, how I wish you could see how red the chief's face is from the anger of losing or maybe it's from being drained from his run. Your friend has beaten every man here and is now known as Rapid. Alas, dear sister I must go and I hope to be able to write again very soon though I do not know if I will be able to.

Missing You Deeply,

Noah

I look over at Mother who has tears pouring down her face I can't tell what type of tears they are. I know she probably wants to know what my plan is and that probably has to do with some of her tears, knowing that her only other child is leaving, or maybe she's just glad to know that Noah is okay. I wrap an arm around my mother and hug her as I release the last of the tears that I'm allowing to fall from my eyes.

I shift my gaze towards Mother, and my heart aches at the sight of her tear-stained face. Her eyes are red-rimmed, and her cheeks are flushed with emotion. I can't quite discern what kind of tears they are - are they tears of relief, joy, or sadness? I can only imagine that she must be wondering what my plans are, and that thought alone could be causing her tears.

As I move closer to her, I can feel the heat radiating from her body. Her breaths come in ragged gasps, and her hands tremble with emotion. It dawns on me that perhaps her tears are a result of the knowledge that her only other child is leaving, and she'll be alone. Or maybe she's just relieved that Noah is safe and sound, and that's causing her tears of joy.

Without a word, I wrap an arm around her, pulling her close to me. I can feel her body shuddering with sobs as she clings to me. As our tears mingle, I realize that this is a moment I'll always remember. I also decide that these will be the last tears that I shed and that no more tears shall fall from my eyes as long as the boys are gone.

I need to change the way I'm acting. Sulking and feeling sorry is gonna get me nowhere.

I release my mother from my embrace. After standing up from the couch, I take a moment to collect myself and wipe away the new tears that have welled up in my eyes. I mutter a few words to my mother, letting her know that I'll be right back, before darting up the stairs to my room.

Once I'm in my room, I quickly change out of my comfortable clothing and into a pair of snug jeggings and a cozy black hoodie. I take a moment to tidy up my hair, brushing it until it gleams, before pulling it back into a high ponytail.

After a quick stop to the bathroom to brush my teeth and wash my face, I rush back to my room to grab my bag. I take a deep breath, trying to calm my racing heart, before sprinting back down the stairs and out the front door. Once outside I run all the way to Eliza's house not stopping to breathe till I get to her front door.

I pound on her front door as hard as I can, "Eliza I need your help!" I pound more, "Eliza!" I pound more. Why the heck is she not answering me? "Elizabeth! Please I really need your help." I sink to the ground. Just as I'm about to give up hope and head home she opens the door and I bolt to my feet.

"What do you need at five thirty in the morning?"

"Is that really the time?" She nods her head, "Oh, I'm sorry. I'm not myself."

"No duh." She rolls her eyes.

"I've been keeping a secret from many people and I'm telling you now because I trust you."

Eliza's expression is a mix of concern and slight annoyance as she nods her head, clearly not pleased by the sudden banging that just happened on her door and the shouting of her name. I empathize with her, as I too would be bothered by such a rude interruption but I had to do it. Despite her initial reaction, she gestures for me to come inside her house, revealing a hint of curiosity about what I could possibly want. It was clear that I had caught her attention, and I felt a sense of eagerness to share what had brought me to her doorstep.